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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Nothing flies faster than the ketchup out of the bottle when you only want a little.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Money is always a motive for murder. Stay broke.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

In other news, congrats to my therapist for securing a 4 year contract with me.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

Damn, how much daylight are they trying to save? It’s dark as hell.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Don’t judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

On my phone, you’ll never see contacts saved as ‘babe’ or ‘love.’ I save full names—first and last—like a government office.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

Nothing more humiliating than sending a text message with a picture and the picture doesn’t send for ages and now you’ve said something sooo odd out of context.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

No one declines an incoming call faster than a 3-year-old watching YouTube.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Weekends are a scam, you spend one day exhausted and the other day anxious. Like, what the hell was that?

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

I wish we were cats so you could just randomly slap co-workers for no reason.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Dec 1, 2025

4,032

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Snapchat:

Being able to notice that a celebrity unfollowed another celebrity is some seriously jobless behaviour.

Making waves on Slack:

I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.

Making waves on Threads:

When I was a kid, there were two ways to die, natural causes and talking back to your parents.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Breaking a heart is considered bad, but melting a heart is somehow good.

Making waves on Facebook:

Normalise following up to an ignored email with “helllooooooo?”

Seen just now on Telegram:

I asked my boyfriend if he believed in trolls and elves and he said, “slightly.”

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Updating my resume. Anyone got a more professional word for “dumpster fire”?

Spotted on Reddit:

I’m neither a lover nor a fighter. I’m a snacker.

Trending via Facebook:

Grocery carts should have barcode scanners on them so you can see how much you’re spending as you put things in your cart.

Trending via LinkedIn:

If a dog growled at me, I would try to understand where they’re coming from.

Home » Funny Loose Lip Quotes

Funny loose lip quotes

New funny loose lip quotes 👇

3 weeks ago

Commentary:
"Remember, in the world of elementary school, teachers are like secret agents – they know all your embarrassing secrets thanks to the little informants running around in their classroom. So, be kind to them, unless you want your dirty laundry aired out during the next parent-teacher conference!"

advice, children, dirt, elementary, humor, kids, lip, loose, loose lip, nice, parenting, teacher

All funny loose lip quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Dec 1, 2025

3,999

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

I don’t want to adult anymore. Don’t even want to be human. I want to be a goat. Jump around randomly, eat what I want, and head-butt anyone who annoys me.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

I like that blood pressure kits come with a free, handy zip-up bag that your stuff will never fit in again once you take it out.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

Bored as hell. Anyone want to emotionally manipulate each other?

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

You’re confusing me with someone who cares what you think of me.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

“Thanks for your payment!” Shut up. I paid that bill against my will.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

I received a bank alert text for suspicious activity. I was buying fruit.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

This going into the office stuff blows. Like, I seriously have to wear clothes now.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

Imagine working at Pornhub. At like the corporate office as a developer or whatever. White collar. That’s gotta be a weird job. Working there has gotta be bloody weird.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Never trust a man that’s good at flirting. He’s had too much practice.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

My husband and I fell in love at first sight. Maybe I should have taken a second look.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

“I’m at a point in my life where I don’t go anywhere unless I absolutely have to.”

Just shared via Twitch:

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, I’m never sending you nudes again.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Men shouldn’t be allowed to download any app other than Wikipedia.

Making waves on TikTok:

“Stop bouncing your leg!” It’s either this or I start screaming.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I don’t want to do exercise, but I want to have done exercise.

Spotted on Slack:

How lazy are you?” I greet people by raising my eyebrows.

Going viral on Slack:

Hey, so this Mercury retrograde is actually really demonic and soul-crippling. Let’s wrap this up by midnight.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

It’s crazy how genuinely entertaining it is to stare into an open fire. That’s some real epigenetic memory shit.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

If you find me offensive, then I suggest you quit finding me.

Just shared via Telegram:

I could never work in an aquarium. I would have a penguin under my shirt at the end of the shift.

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