Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

I cannot hear a word you are saying if your hoodie strings are uneven.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

What is the morning wood equivalent for women, and why do I always have it?

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

I hate when I grab a live wire and everyone sees my damn skeleton.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

The only thing faster than an escalator is an escasooner.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Being a writer means having a story you want everyone in the world to read, except anyone who knows you.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

Egyptians did pretty well for a civilization that wrote entirely in emoji.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

I saw The Blair Witch Project way too young and it made me afraid of projects.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Looks fade but dark, twisted, inappropriate humor is forever.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,686

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

I’m a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Who needs a weighted blanket when you’ve got the weight of the world?

Making waves on X:

That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

Shared recently on Facebook:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Shared recently on Instagram:

After 30, an all-nighter is not getting up to pee.

Seen just now on Telegram:

My neighbors were yelling so loud at their kids to clean up their room that out of fear even I started cleaning my room.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I’m still at work.

Spotted on Messenger:

People who quit their jobs before having a backup job lined up ain’t scared of nothing.

Trending via Threads:

If overthinking burned calories, I’d never need to exercise again.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Yeah, sex is great, but have you ever watched the teams you hate be first-round exits?

Funny loose lip quotes

New funny loose lip quotes 👇

Be nice to your children’s teachers. Especially elementary ones, cause kids have loose lips and that teacher has all the dirt on you.

5 days ago

advice, children, dirt, elementary, humor, kids, lip, loose, loose lip, nice, parenting, teacher

All funny loose lip quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on X this month:

Alcohol is actually a performance-enhancing drug. But you’re not gonna like the performance.

45 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t think humans were put on this earth to know what Salesforce is. It’s unnatural.

60 shares on WeChat this month:

Let me seduce you with my knowledge on useless things.

18 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Libraries were a good start, but we need more places where people can’t talk.

46 shares on TikTok this month:

90% of my thoughts start with: “What can I eat now?”

19 shares on Telegram this month:

I try to find the good in every situation. Wait, no – that was a typo. Food. I try to find the food in every situation.

51 shares on YouTube this month:

I bet God still calls it Twitter.

18 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m just a crazy person looking for a crazy person who finds me completely normal.

54 shares on Twitch this month:

Twitter is just a diary I choose to show to strangers.

40 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It’s almost time to put winter tires on the struggle bus.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

Sure, you can invite more people to the plans we made 2 months ago. The more, the merrier. Also, I’m not going now.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

My toxic trait is treating my glasses like they’re not the most expensive thing I wear everyday.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Trying to carry a pet to bed is like moving a dense liquid that’s annoyed by you.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

I thought my friends in their 60s were making love in the other room but they were just putting on their socks.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

I, unfortunately, was born without any interest in Avatar.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

All I want I for Christmas is to go to the mall in 1986.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

I’m not into casual sex. Send me a résumé.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

No one told me adulting would involve trying to avoid so many scams.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

A treadmill minute is four times as long as a sleep minute.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

Getting old is not fun. Sometimes I have to check my texts and photos when someone asks me what I did yesterday.

Live now on Pinterest:

We all have that one coworker whose sole purpose is to reduce our life expectancy by ten years.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Anxiety should have a loyalty rewards program.

Making waves on Twitch:

No, it’s totally fine, Grandma. Nobody else needs to use the stairs today.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I have lots of hidden talents. The problem is, even I can’t find them.

Making waves on YouTube:

Grocery carts should have barcode scanners on them so you can see how much you’re spending as you put things in your cart.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Іf you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, just remember that nobody loves you on any other day of the year either.

Making waves on Twitch:

Saying “Hmmmm” when my boss walks in so he knows I’m thinking about stuff.

Making waves on Slack:

Losing jewelry is a different type of hurt.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Never faked an orgasm before, but the joy of ugly presents.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny loose lip quotes

New funny loose lip quotes 👇

Be nice to your children’s teachers. Especially elementary ones, cause kids have loose lips and that teacher has all the dirt on you.

All funny loose lip quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨