Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Sorry, can’t. I’m currently nodding in class so the teacher doesn’t feel sad.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

Nothing fixes your life the way deactivating Instagram does.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Wish my metabolism worked as fast as my anxiety.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

You wear a white shirt and all of a sudden everybody wants to go eat spaghetti.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Welcome, new followers! It’s all downhill from here.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

I’m not worried about WWIII. I’ve been feeding a crow army for three years.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

Love to come home after a long day’s work and relax with one thousand short-form videos.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Men be like “I hate drama,” and then have love triangles, secret babies, a wife, side chick, ex that’s still around, breadcrumbs, and unhealed trauma.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

I’m not mad, I just hope your socks slide off in your shoe all day.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

I speak for everyone when I say that finding the balance between watching movies, watching TV shows, and playing video games is harder than any job.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,368

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

Preparing for my beach vacation by watching Jaws.

Trending via Discord:

Nothing hurts more than someone not getting your joke.

Seen just now on Threads:

Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier woman.

Just shared via Threads:

Being gracefully unhinged is the only way to get through the everyday bullshit.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Thinking of starting a religion around cheese.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Don’t let anyone treat you like pond water. You are Fiji water, okay?

Seen just now on Twitch:

When I turned into the harbor of marriage, I didn’t know that a warship was anchored there.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Are French bulldogs actually French? They seem kinda Puerto Rican.

Broadcasted on X:

The art of letting whoever think whatever.

Making waves on Messenger:

I was actually doing so well until your email found me.

Funny personal issue quotes

New funny personal issue quotes 👇

All funny personal issue quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t think you all understand. If Taylor Swift didn’t have a private jet, she’d be Taylor Slow.

25 shares on Twitch this month:

Considering joining a cult just for the subsidized housing.

27 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Establish dominance over your cat by suddenly bolting out of the room for no reason.

22 shares on X this month:

At my next job, I’m gonna lie about having a kid so I can leave the office anytime I want like everyone else with children.

13 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If I complain about being out of shape, I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people?

22 shares on Messenger this month:

You gotta separate the art from the artist. Like, for example, sometimes the artist is really nice but their art sucks.

74 shares on Facebook this month:

My youngest started kindergarten today and I cried, but mostly for his teachers.

79 shares on YouTube this month:

Thinking of starting a true crime podcast. Gotta explain this search history somehow.

11 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Everyone you know is fighting battles you don’t know about, except for my neighbor who just can not shut up about his battles.

87 shares on Pinterest this month:

No, I can’t tonight. I already have plans to look at my phone somewhere else.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish I was a cat, because the fatter you are, the more people like you.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

THRILLED to announce I did an Ironman this weekend! Attended 3 social gatherings in 3 days.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The funniest thing I heard an elder say, “My generation had Wonder Woman, your generation has to wonder if it’s a woman.”

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Thoughts & prayers to all of us back at work tomorrow after the colossal mistake of thinking we’d be lads of leisure forever, for some reason.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

If I ever go missing, check the snack aisle. I’m probably just deciding.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish I had the free time of someone who leaves a positive Amazon review for a rake.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

My new coffee table book, “Accidental Screenshots,” is available for pre-order now.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Actually, you’re having a conversation with yourself. I’m just here so you don’t appear totally insane.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,438

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

Even though he murders a lot of people, you can tell Freddie Kruger is a fun loving guy cause he goes by Freddie and not Fred or Frederick.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

Me, as a vampire: Tell me, mortal, have you had any alcohol in the last 24 hours?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

My therapist says I’m preoccupied with revenge. She’s going to regret that.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Reverse cowgirl so he doesn’t see the double chin.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

Anyone else who tells their pets every time they leave the house that they’ll be back soon?

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Absolutely love wanting to do a lot of things and ending up not doing even one! Yay.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

This cop is parked illegally behind me with his lights on. I’m going to say something.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

“I’m in a really good place right now, not mentally. I’m just indoors with air conditioning.”

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

When I say “the other day”, it can be anytime between yesterday and my birth.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Twitch:

Me: Do you have the movie I want to watch? Netflix: No, but we have hundreds of movies that you don’t want to watch!

Spotted on X:

All I think about is death and sex.

Seen just now on YouTube:

There is nothing an orgasm can’t fix, I have researched it extensively.

Shared recently on X:

Eternal Sunshine of the Thotless Grind.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I don’t want to adult anymore. Don’t even want to be human. I want to be a goat. Jump around randomly, eat what I want, and head-butt anyone who annoys me.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

No one is shocked when a defibrillator doesn’t work.

Making waves on Twitch:

My reality check bounced, guess I’ll have to stay insane for the time being.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

My favorite thing about summer is opening a window for 30 seconds so an insect that hasn’t been identified by science yet can fly into your home.

Going viral on TikTok:

Flip me over like a cassette tape, and play me again.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Camping? No, thank you. If I wanted to sleep outside, I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

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