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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

Are they honking at me because I’m cute or because I can’t drive.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

My bank account may not be full but my sink, laundry basket and arteries sure are.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

I sometimes have the desire to meet certain people again for the first time. Only to simply walk past them.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

I haven’t posted a selfie in a while, but I’m still very cute. Just to keep you updated.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m “I can’t sit like that for too long” years old.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

A dating app for people who are shy called Mumble.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Having now listened to the entire song, I have to say there’s some obvious internal disagreement as to what the Hokey Pokey is all about.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Everyone gives pleasure in some way, one when they enter a room, the other when they leave it.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

I like to swear a lot so that people will keep their kids away from me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2444 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,606

Funny Quotes Topics

15,275

Funny Quotes Images

12,606

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,450

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Slack:

Interviewer: So why do you want this job? Me: I don’t. I just need money.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Sometimes our greatest achievement in life is being able to survive our own thoughts.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

Just shared via Threads:

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

Seen just now on X:

You’ve agreed to go out with me, so that’s going to immediately count against you.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Agriculture can’t possibly be a dying industry. Bot farms are booming.

Spreading quickly via X:

If you add orange juice to Jason Momoa, you get a Jason Mimosa.

Breaking via Snapchat:

An Advent Calendar for adults but behind every door is a different kind of anxiety medication.

Shared recently on Slack:

Cigarette smell gotta be one of the worst smells in the history of smells.

Trending via WeChat:

Did you know electronics need smoke to work? Once the smoke comes out of them, they stop working.

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Funny police officer quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2444 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,606

Funny Quotes Topics

15,275

Funny Quotes Images

12,606

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,457

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

I’m a freak in the spreadsheets.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

I don’t care if it’s AI or an immigrant, I desperately need someone to take my job, it’s killing me.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Some women seated next to me are gossiping in French. They obviously think I’m some dumb American who doesn’t speak French and they are correct.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

The human body is amazing. One half-open eye and the brain under emergency power are enough to make coffee.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

You ever killed your own vibe by remembering?

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

I’m not actively avoiding you. I don’t actively do anything.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Welcome to your 50’s. Your doctor and pharmacist are both in your contacts now.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Friends with benefits, but it’s just that they make delicious baked goods.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Leave me alone, man. I’m just living my life like a candle in the wind.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I’m not calling anyone daddy unless I’m asking for money for the mall.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

Guys, please stop wearing NASA shirts, I bet you can’t even name one of their songs.

Just landed via Instagram:

Feeling like a bug without his rug.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I wear a lot of clothes for someone who hates doing laundry.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

In honor of the winter solstice, I also will be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

Reported on WhatsApp:

8 planets, 204 countries, thousands of islands, 7 seas, 8 billion people, and I’m single.

Just shared via Facebook:

The unemployed urge to say I love you during a job interview.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

How many of you also constantly take screenshots of something and then never look at them again?

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Falling off academically is worse than a heartbreak.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

I see WWIII is about to kick off again. I’d best cancel the milk and get the cat in.

Spotted on Facebook:

Alexa, tell Roomba to get the spider.

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