Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

I don’t mind pulling your cart — I’ve been chasing the carrot anyway, and it’s in the same direction.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

Some people shop for designer heels. I shop for nonstop flight deals.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Unless it’s manic, I don’t want to hear about your Monday.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

Got a scam email full of mistakes like they’re not even trying. It won’t be long before AI takes their jobs.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

I get shy when my man stares at me for too long because what if he’s realizing I’m actually a lil ugly.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

When people say I don’t mean to brag, they’re bragging about not bragging.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Sleeping in in winter is really great, you still have about an hour of daylight left before it gets dark again.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Every ‘c’ in ‘Pacific Ocean’ is pronounced differently.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

I don’t care if it’s AI or an immigrant, I desperately need someone to take my job, it’s killing me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,653

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

Shopping at the dollar store makes me feel rich and poor all at the same time.

Shared recently on WeChat:

It’s important to get out of the house every once in a while to get excited about going home.

Just landed via Instagram:

If the interviewer doesn’t think it’s cool when you pull a quarter out of his ear, the job wasn’t good enough for you anyways.

Making waves on Instagram:

I’m too lazy to be a superhero. If I had laser eyes, I’d probably just use them to heat soup or something.

Spreading quickly via X:

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, and most do.

Making waves on Instagram:

The circus does not condone the actions being taken by its monkeys.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Tonight we shall read a passage from the old testicle.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I accidentally clicked on an ad, so I guess I will see that product all over my phone until I’m dead.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Be the lemon you want the world to hand to others.

Just shared via TikTok:

My superpower is wasting time I don’t even have.

Funny reflex quotes

New funny reflex quotes 👇

All funny reflex quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

73 shares on TikTok this month:

What’s a beginner question to ask for someone just getting into being nosy?

55 shares on Telegram this month:

Relationships are actually easy when you’re not dating a retard.

73 shares on Threads this month:

Changing your mind is an underrated activity.

16 shares on Twitch this month:

Instagram is run by celebrities. Twitter is run by the streets.

86 shares on Twitch this month:

At bedtime, I ceremonially move the claw clip from my hair to the bag of chips, signifying the end of the day.

90 shares on Slack this month:

Hey, boy, are you the worst-case scenario? Because you’re all I think about.

27 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

67 shares on Facebook this month:

I just want peace, not a notification every time someone breathes.

74 shares on YouTube this month:

I have no issue with people talking in the morning. But not with me, please!

57 shares on Pinterest this month:

Alexa, take responsibility for my actions.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Babe, would it kill you to meow back?

8 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s not the destination that matters. It’s the snacks you eat on the way.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I took the road less traveled. Where am I?

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Googling symptoms until you cry.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Texting random numbers “It’s done.”

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I respect perfume commercials being like we can’t show you a smell mind if we just go insane for 30 seconds.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t hate me, date me!

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Leggings: elegant for some, elephant for others.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I love it when God gives me money.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

You know when you have so much to do that you just sit down and do nothing?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,499

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Money enters like Beyoncé and exits like Britney.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

The feminine urge to open a coffee shop that’s also a library, a bakery, and a flower shop.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Sometimes you just gotta say LOL and move on.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

In my 20’s: might hit the club tonight. In my 40’s: might go to the grocery store to listen to some bangers.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Girls know how to flirt until it’s with someone they actually like.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

Being an adult is spending every day looking at a pill bottle, wondering, “Did I take this already?”

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

At my age, I’m more frightened of a hip break than a heartbreak.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Just a few more hours of scrolling, and then I will finally know.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

If you’re happy and you know it, you’re clearly not paying enough attention.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Slack:

I’m never drinking again, unless something is going on later today.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

It’s all fun and games until it’s 10 p.m., you’re all cozy in bed, and you remember you still have laundry in the washer.

Trending via Threads:

It’s funny how sometimes you buy a book, then read it in two days, and sometimes you buy a book, and it lives on your bookshelf for 12 years.

Making waves on Reddit:

Turns out my superpower is the ability to go into incredible detail in completely the wrong direction.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Goodbye, August, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Making waves on Threads:

My sweatpants sat me down and said they want me to get an office job again.

Breaking via Slack:

To horses, hay is considered both a bed and breakfast.

Going viral on TikTok:

The worst part about going to work is the part where you have to go to work.

Just shared via Slack:

Euthanizing my Tamagotchi.

Trending via X:

These quiet electric cars are really annoying. I have to stop scrolling and look up while walking outside now.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴