Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

I was going to go for a run, then realized I could just run my mouth on here.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

The pizza delivery guys say “see you tomorrow” to everyone, right?

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

When someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying ‘Haven’t decided yet’ is typically a good response.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Water bottle leaking in your bag is a top 10 worst experience.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

We hate the same people and it’s so romantic.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

We literally used to write an essay by hand.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

For introverts, the worst kind of head-on collision is running directly into the person we’re avoiding at the grocery store.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

I figured out how they built the pyramids. No internet.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

I hate it when I check my transactions history, and everything adds up like damn, so no one stole from me.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

You know you’re getting old when you clean the house to the music you used to go out to.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,561

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

When is a robot gonna take over my job? Please?

Trending via Messenger:

People who live alone should get one practice conversation before they have to speak out loud for the first time that day.

Shared recently on Threads:

I’m a simple person. All I need in life to be happy is to have everything go my way and work out how I want it to.

Spotted on WeChat:

Instead of saying “Good morning,” my wife and I go straight into explanations of how badly we each slept.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Old Spice doesn’t sound like something you wanna smell.

Just landed via WeChat:

I love when my friends have quiet boyfriends. Like, girl, your dog is so good, sis.

Seen just now on Discord:

Even on the coldest of days, there’s such peace found in the warm embrace of a hot pizza.

Just landed via Reddit:

One day you said w00t for the last time, and didn’t even realize.

Just shared via Reddit:

The part right before bench pressing when you’re laying down but not lifting is so good.

Live now on Reddit:

Gonna waterboard my houseplants so they know who’s the boss.

Funny sex life quotes

New funny sex life quotes 👇

All funny sex life quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on Messenger this month:

Lord of the Rings is wild cause Gandalf told Frodo he had to go on a super dangerous journey and Frodo was like “Ok, can I bring my gardener?”

72 shares on WeChat this month:

They should build a separate grocery store for people who have actually purchased food before, know how to push a cart, and possess at least an ounce of spatial awareness.

74 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Having now listened to the entire song, I have to say there’s some obvious internal disagreement as to what the Hokey Pokey is all about.

69 shares on TikTok this month:

I could low-key really use a wish right now.

25 shares on Snapchat this month:

I always knew I’d get old. How fast it happened was a bit of a surprise though.

20 shares on Slack this month:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

89 shares on Twitch this month:

I think I’ma end the year with a plot twist, everyone hold on tight.

86 shares on WeChat this month:

Silently hoping for a comet to strike, to get out of today’s responsibilities.

70 shares on YouTube this month:

If your first child is uncomplicated, then it’s a trick of nature to get you to have a second child. The second will be an unpredictable bundle of energy that seems to get by without sleep.

59 shares on Snapchat this month:

Not being able to see Likes on posts is a tragedy. Love it when two people are arguing and you can see all their little backup dancers.

Trending Topics 📁

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Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I would like to be reincarnated as less tired.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Doctor advised me to stop drinking. This is going to be a big change for me. I was with that doctor for decades.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Set my sex robot to boyfriend mode and now it’s liking other girls’ pictures on Insta.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Spending 5 minutes looking up every word I want to use in a sentence to make sure I can define it in case they ask.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m a go with the flow kind of gal unless the flow is after 9pm or involves parallel parking.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Sucking melted cheese off the burger wrapper as God intended.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The free hotel blow-dryer should be easier to get off the bathroom wall.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s crazy how drinking poison makes you feel like shit the next day.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when kids scream in public. You don’t have real problems. It should be me screaming.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

You can tell a lot about a person by breaking into their home and going through their belongings.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,472

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean it won’t be a good time.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

364 days until Christmas, and people already have decorations up. Unbelievable.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

When Dr. Seuss wrote, “Oh, The Places You’ll Go,” he did not consider how comfortable my couch would be.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

I don’t hold grudges. I just remember facts very aggressively.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

I know my limits. I don’t always obey them, but I know them.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

It’s all fun and games until your jeans don’t fit any more.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Telling my boss I can’t come back to work because I’ve discovered the joy of doing nothing.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

My dental hygienist is probably thinking, I bet i could braid this guys nose hair.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Handshakes should be banned. Touch our naked body parts together for all the world to see? Gross!

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Please do not test me. I’ve been saving up my rage like PTO.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

At the gym and I forgot my headphones and now I have to listen to my own thoughts. Send help.

Going viral on Messenger:

Sisters are so important. How else would my mom find out all the stuff I didn’t want her to know.

Making waves on Messenger:

I think you would all treat me a lot better if I possessed a small amount of plutonium.

Spotted on X:

“You’re like cherry lip gloss. I just can’t get enough.”

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Do you mind if I smash this object of great sentimental value?

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I used to have a great future in my past.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

She was rare. Like a parking spot in the front row on a rainy day.

Just landed via Threads:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Putting a blanket over my boss so he thinks it’s night time and goes to sleep.

Trending via YouTube:

If you need me, I will be at the library sniffing old books.

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