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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Getting an extra 20 minutes in the day when someone cancels a meeting is like finding a penny on the ground. Not gonna use it for anything, but wow, am I excited.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

If a demon ever possessed me, I’d just sit back and say, “Your problem now.”

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Hey (threateningly), can I join your years-old, tight-knit, close friend group?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

Of course, I also put my mobile down from time to time. For example, when someone tries to call me.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

In the future, there will be grandmas who can’t bake but have tattoos on their backs.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

Messed up and threw a surprise party for my minimalist friend. Now 25 of us are hiding behind the granite orb.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

My trauma is between me and this bartender. The rest of you, mind your business.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

494 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,087

Funny Quotes Topics

17,241

Funny Quotes Images

15,087

Updated

Dec 19, 2025

Users Online

3,941

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

To save money in this economy, I’ve tried eating out and I’ve tried cooking at home. The answer is starvation.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Maybe if I spend another day alone in my room then something life-changing will suddenly happen to me!?

Spotted on Facebook:

At the dispensary asking which strain will stop the yearning.

Making waves on Discord:

The first Humans saw the sun go up and then back down, and so they decided to call it a day.

Freshly posted on Threads:

What’s it called when you mentally want to be horny but you’re physically not at all?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Sorry, my bedroom looks like a child with a credit card decorated it. Do you still want to bone?

Just landed via Messenger:

Time to get off the internet, I’ve already had enough stupid for the week.

Home » Funny Spontaneous Quotes

Funny spontaneous quotes

New funny spontaneous quotes 👇

I’ve learned the best way to find something that I’ve lost is to buy a replacement one, to make the lost one spontaneously appear.

4 days ago

appear, best, buy, finding, humor, irony, item, learned, lesson, life, life lesson, lost, lost item, problem, problem-solving, replacement, solving, something, spontaneous
I can’t wait to buy Chanel bags on a random Tuesday for me and my friends.

4 months ago

bag, bags, buy, chanel, Chanel bag, excitement, friend, friends, i, luxury, me, random, shopping, spontaneous, treat yourself, Tuesday, wait

All funny spontaneous quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

“I’m interested in the divorce rate for couples who sleep in queen versus king beds.”

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

I keep forgetting i’m at the age where people will tell me they’re pregnant and my reaction is supposed to be positive.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Don’t forget, you are someone’s weird colleague.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

December, give me a sweet ending for this year please.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Tonight, the moon is staring at me.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

My neighbor is having some kind of party and didn’t invite me. I guess I have to call the cops again.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Slack:

Bro, did you seriously just forget about Dre?

Breaking via TikTok:

Muting morons is good for your health.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I do not know how to put this gently, but part of being a good driver is using the gas and brake as little as humanly possible.

Just landed via TikTok:

You know it’s a fancy restaurant when you have to point at what you want on the menu because you can’t pronounce the name.

Spotted on Reddit:

This whole week could have been an email.

Live now on Slack:

Each day on Twitter, there is one main character. The goal is to never be it.

Just landed via Slack:

Whenever I go down the stairs next to an escalator, I always move faster than the escalator to prove to the people I made the better decision.

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Activity Log ✨

Funny spontaneous quotes

New funny spontaneous quotes 👇

I’ve learned the best way to find something that I’ve lost is to buy a replacement one, to make the lost one spontaneously appear.

I can’t wait to buy Chanel bags on a random Tuesday for me and my friends.

All funny spontaneous quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Going to a concert with a tomato in each hand just to make the band nervous.

If you’re offended by bacon, the United States of America isn’t for you.

My fitness goal is to lose two straight jacket sizes.

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

I need a day off from myself.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

A girl, her bed, and TV series on a Friday evening is a true love story.

A storm knows it’s laced with destruction, and yet it rages on.

The best part about having a crush is when they crush all your hopes and dreams.

Normalize having a threatening aura, but really just being a sweetheart.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow.

“You’re a cougar!” God forbid a woman gives back to the youth.

5pm on a Friday: call me a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I’m not working.

Alexa, tell Roomba to get the spider.

Got asked to be a godparent, proving God has lowered his recruitment standards.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Remember when you were a kid, you slept on the couch and without saying anything you found yourself in your bed. Now you sleep in your bed and if you say anything, you end up on the couch.

I love the idea of a fruitarian, just morally affronted that anyone could eat a baby spinach.

Note to self: Very important! First hang up, then insult.

Convinced my kid her harmonica didn’t work because the instructions were missing.

No, I don’t like nature. I can’t respect anything that would so flippantly turn dinosaurs into birds.

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