Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Telling the guy next to me on the subway that I’m not even ticklish, so don’t bother trying.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

Let me help you turn that software into hardware.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

People really be like, “I would never do that to you,” and then do it with a remix.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

That was pointless, we could’ve just stayed strangers.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

You ran a half marathon? That’s really cool, I’ve almost finished a bunch of things, too.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

I really cannot be friends with picky eaters because it somehow always correlates to bigger problems and character flaws.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

This year has been the perfect blend between me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Retiring my wallet condom after two years of active duty. 87 tours with 0 combat deployments.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

I have been nothing but creepy and aggressive to you. Please respond.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,756

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Snapchat:

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I got a bumper sticker that says, “Honk if you think I’m pretty.” Sometimes I just sit at green lights until I feel better about myself.

Just shared via Facebook:

I personally get offended when rain is referred to as “bad weather.”

Just landed via Instagram:

Me going to work because I’m too honest to scam people, too shy to be an influencer, too good for a sugar daddy, and too dumb for crypto.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

What doesn’t kill you makes you wish it did.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

Live now on YouTube:

Can someone come over and take this phone away from me?

Spotted on Facebook:

“It’s the most wonderful crime of the year!” I crooned running away with the pot of Santa’s donations.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I have no issue with people talking in the morning. But not with me, please!

Just shared via YouTube:

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow.

Funny spotlight quotes

Funny spotlight quotes shine a hilarious light on those moments when all eyes are on you 🎤✨ Whether you’re stealing the show or just surviving the glare, these witty lines bring laughter and charm to center stage 😂🌟 Get ready to brighten your day and own your moment with some seriously funny vibes! 🎭💫

New funny spotlight quotes 👇

All funny spotlight quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Reddit this month:

Another Netflix price increase? Guess we’re only chilling now.

42 shares on Snapchat this month:

Someone asked me how much I spend on a bottle of wine. 30 minutes was not the right answer.

27 shares on Reddit this month:

I no longer dislike Mondays, I’m mature now… I dislike the whole week.

82 shares on Discord this month:

Don’t scare me, I fart easily.

19 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Me, first week as a volunteer firefighter thinking we only rescue cats: We’re going where?

94 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Born to be a frolicker of the forest, forced to be a cog in the machine.

42 shares on Reddit this month:

Weekends are getting shorter and shorter. You blink and it’s already Sunday 5pm.

13 shares on TikTok this month:

I will sit in the rain about this.

68 shares on TikTok this month:

People will think you know what you’re talking about if you give your opinion while cleaning a pair of reading glasses.

85 shares on Slack this month:

“I asked ChatGPT”. I confided in Amazon. I confessed to McDonald’s. I have an inside joke with Exxon Mobil.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to Twitter, where people never let their lack of knowledge get in the way of expressing a strong opinion.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Pinterest algorithm is like a loving dad who fills the whole fridge with oranges after seeing you enjoy one.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes people just need you to be genuine with them, and I personally have no problem pretending to do that.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Not sure if “life hack” exactly, but I fell down the stairs and now my whole family is being so nice and catering to my needs.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I respectfully ignore DMs because I promise you, I am not your soulmate.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The older you get, the farther away your toenails are when they need a trim.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

January 1st: anything is possible. January 2nd: but not today.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Responding to any and all emails with ‘wow ok’

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,683

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

Halloween is the only day you can ghost someone and blame it on being festive.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

The state of my house can best be described as “there seems to have been a struggle”.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

Rescuing a cute dog and teaching it how to drive me home from the pub.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

They say white people don’t have their own culture, but I just got invited to a gender reveal party for a dog, and there’s no way we appropriated that from anyone else.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

ALF is what happens when you are high on drugs in the 80s.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Every outdoor cat should be given a little cowboy hat and a gun.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

According to autocorrect, my favorite Star Wars character is Bob’s Feet.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

“I’m like Sisyphus but with dishes. Dishyphus.”

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Due to inflation and tariffs, my love now costs a thing.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Slack:

I wish laying in bed all day made me rich.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I eat cake because it’s somebody’s birthday somewhere.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Caught a belt loop on a door handle and got yanked back with such force that my audio is no longer in sync with my actions.

Freshly posted on Discord:

What I lack in moves on the dance floor, I more than make up for in dancing around a conversation.

Going bananas on X:

Tested positive for being single af

Broadcasted on Discord:

The only exercise I’ve done this month is running… out of money!

Just shared via Twitch:

I laugh at my own jokes because I am my target audience. Y’all just happen to be there.

Breaking via Facebook:

What beautiful weather outside. I’m gonna close the curtains.

Just shared via TikTok:

A Southerner dies every time you people type “ya’ll” instead of “y’all,” btw.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

My laundry is done, but I don’t even want it anymore. The washing machine can keep it.

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