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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

I’m not sure what everyone at my coworking space does for work, but I’m pretty sure one guy’s job is chewing.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Lost another rap battle by just agreeing with everything the other guy said.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

No more fun facts. I want to know what your last nightmare was about.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

How is a plant not able to handle direct sunlight? You’re from outside.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Ever ghost an entire event to avoid one ghost from your past?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

A good relationship is when she is by your side during bad times to tell you that none of this would have happened if you had just listened to her.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

In honor of the winter solstice, I also will be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Texting is so boring. Just show up to my door with roses.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

You either have a full ketchup bottle in your house or an almost empty one. There’s no in-between.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2447 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,609

Funny Quotes Topics

15,283

Funny Quotes Images

12,609

51 minutes ago

3,452

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Twitch:

Men will ruin your whole life then come back and like your story.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

If you want your kid to play with their toy just give it to your other kid. Follow me for more parenting hacks.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I’m dying for some sweets and the only thing sweet in the house is me.

Making waves on Facebook:

Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

Making waves on Discord:

50 is the new 30. Because it takes 50 bucks to buy what 30 used to.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Husband and I were blissfully happy for 25 years. Then we met.

Just shared via Threads:

Ponytails are only hot on women, bro.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

If I ever go missing, please print my picture on wine bottles and not on milk boxes. My friends are more likely to find me then.

Spotted on Twitch:

Sugar held my hand through every breakup.

Group projects in school weren’t meant to teach you teamwork, they were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.

Jan 24, 2025

Group projects in school weren’t meant to teach you teamwork, they were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.

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Commentary:
Ah, group projects in school – the necessary evil that prepares us for the chaos of the corporate world! 🤦‍♂️📚 Who knew that dodging group members in a school project would be the perfect training for dodging responsibility in the office? 😂 Remember, teamwork makes the dream work…unless you're stuck with a team of dreamers who forgot to set their alarms! ⏰ #WorkLife #TeamworkDreamwork

coworkers, deal, group, group project, humor, incompetence, lesson, life, life lesson, meant, project, school, teach, teamwork, workplace

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2447 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,609

Funny Quotes Topics

15,283

Funny Quotes Images

12,609

51 minutes ago

3,463

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

Three words no parent ever wants to hear when dropping their kid at a play date: “Come on in.”

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Why is smoking the only addiction jobs give you breaks to do? I should get 15 minutes every hour to cook up some parlays.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

I wanted to wear some hot lingerie, but didn’t have any, so I put on this red dental floss.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

When I eat rotisserie chicken, I like to pretend that I’m performing an autopsy.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

Spent the day decorating the house for Christmas and my wife spent the day re-decorating the house for Christmas.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Once I matched with a guy and ended up finding out he lived in my neighborhood, so I told him to go outside and scream, and he did. And I heard it.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

Every man’s biggest fear is trying a new barber.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

There should be a zoo that has people from every country in it.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Schedule your appointment early in the month before your dentist starts fretting about their next boat payment.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

And for my next trick, I’m going to make this first date the last date.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

Reported on Discord:

I wish people would stop holding back and use social media to tell us how they really feel.

Seen just now on X:

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought logical arguments would change someone’s mind.

Just landed via TikTok:

“You shouldn’t let your cat jump on the counter”, my cat could take out a loan in my name if he wanted to.

Live now on X:

It was a complicated 17-hour surgery, but they finally managed to separate the art from the artist.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Who’s up thinking about the crushing weight of existence?

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I am the proud father of two content providers. I mean children. Two children.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Had salad for the third night in a row and now I get why you’re so angry, vegans.

Spotted on Facebook:

Thanks for leaving my door open; I was running low on houseflies.

Just shared via Slack:

Pilots lowkey have an aura when they walk past you in the airport.

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