Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, yes, the elusive and rare human manifestation of a headache, talkative, demanding, and ever-present. 🤯💆‍♂️ Beware, approach with caution, and keep aspirin close by at all times!"

ever, headache, human, humor, meet, met, personality, version

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Monsters can’t hide under my bed. That’s where my cats have their fight club.

0

2 months ago

bed, cat, cats, childhood, club, fight, fight club, hide, humor, imagination, monster, monsters, pet, where
Girls only want one thing, and it’s to be photographed candidly on 35mm film.

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4 months ago

35mm, 35mm film, camera, candid, film, film camera, girl, girls, humor, only, photograph, photography, thing, want
Homeless man just called me a “loser,” and I showed him my house keys.

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5 months ago

comeback, homeless, homeless man, house, house key, humor, i, insult, interaction, irony, just, key, keys, loser, man, me, social, social interaction
I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it.

0

2 months ago

back, diet, fitness, follow, humor, irony, loss, media, social, social media, unfollow, weight, weight loss
Mashed potatoes are just German guacamole.

0

2 months ago

avocado, food, food joke, German, guacamole, humor, joke, just, mashed, mashed potat, potat, potato
Introducing two cats is tedium. Not interested in your dumb politics just lick each other and be normal already.

0

2 months ago

behavior, cat, cats, dumb, just, lick, normal, politics, tedium

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on Discord this month:

I’ve been alive my whole life, and not once have I seen a commercial for Chinese food.

72 shares on TikTok this month:

For all those wondering, yes, I am retired. I was tired yesterday, and I am tired again today.

94 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t think I’ve ever made the right amount of pasta.

28 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m bad at being sad. Three minutes in, and I’m already making fun of my situation.

42 shares on Discord this month:

I deserve a percentage of your pay if you ever stole any swag from me.

71 shares on Slack this month:

Overthinking should at least burn calories.

46 shares on Slack this month:

Accepting you’re about to throw up, gotta be the worst feeling on God’s green earth.

71 shares on Messenger this month:

The problem with salad is, it’s salad.

59 shares on Facebook this month:

Saying “sounds good to me” in a meeting then quickly realizing a lot more was expected from you.

79 shares on Reddit this month:

I like to minimize the disappointment by being myself right from the start.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

No more relationships for me, the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Someday I will make a sandwich that will change my life forever.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Counting calories is a great way to combine super fun things like math and not eating.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Did you get that psychic damage I sent you?

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

There should be a three-day weekend: one day to do nothing, one day to do something, and one day to do laundry.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

Dear autocorrect, that’s not what I was trying to say. I’m getting tired of your shirt.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

They should let you spend one night in a house before you buy/rent it, just to make sure it’s haunted.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

What if the universe wasn’t infinite or finite, but a secret third thing?

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

It got weird when I thought both arm rests at the movie theatre were mine.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Don’t really want to have 6-8 pints and a takeaway tonight, but it’s Friday and rules are rules.

Live now on Facebook:

Ruined a Ferrari guy’s day today by telling him that I loved his Corvette.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I’m sorry that I’m canceling plans. I made them last week when I assumed that, by now, I’d be a different person.

Seen just now on Threads:

I’m upset that my parents never got rich enough for me to become a socialist.

Just landed via Telegram:

You’d be surprised how many times you can use the word succulent in a work email.

Just landed via TikTok:

According to this box of macaroni and cheese, I am an entire family.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Dear music, thanks!

Just shared via Reddit:

They should invent a food that sounds good for dinner tonight.

Going viral on Twitch:

I’ve been on Facebook for so long, I remember when it all used to be farmland.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Have you ever met the human version of a headache?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Monsters can’t hide under my bed. That’s where my cats have their fight club.

Girls only want one thing, and it’s to be photographed candidly on 35mm film.

Homeless man just called me a “loser,” and I showed him my house keys.

I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it.

Mashed potatoes are just German guacamole.

Introducing two cats is tedium. Not interested in your dumb politics just lick each other and be normal already.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨