30 funny met quotes - Wordgag

Nobody supports you like that one internet friend you’ve never met.

May 25, 2026

Take me back to the night we met so I can never give you a chance.

May 19, 2026

You know it’s bad when people start telling you, you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

May 19, 2026

“I’ve never met a medical receptionist that I believed wanted me to live.”

May 19, 2026

Men will ask you zero questions about yourself, and then say they never met anybody like you.

May 19, 2026

I deleted Google when I met you because the search was over.

May 18, 2026

(to my executioner) I wish we had met before this. You seem cool.

Apr 1, 2026

Software engineers are the dumbest smart people I’ve ever met.

Apr 1, 2026

Hiking in your 40s is a great way to meet new people. Today I met two paramedics, three nurses, a cardiologist, and nearly met Jesus.

Apr 1, 2026

Somewhere, a therapist you never met knows about you.

Apr 1, 2026

I met the real Santa tonight, and he said you’re all in trouble.

Apr 1, 2026

Maybe the problem is that I’m cooler than any man I’ve ever met.

Apr 1, 2026

Growing up, there was a Cody in every elementary school class, but as an adult, I haven’t met a Cody in years. Where did they go?

Mar 31, 2026

Based on the amount of laundry I wash each week, I’m starting to think there are people who live here that I haven’t met yet.

Mar 31, 2026

You know it’s bad when people start telling you that you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

Mar 31, 2026

(Most depressed guy you’ve ever met) I’m doing pretty good.

Mar 31, 2026

I’m so old and have never even met a woman named Jolene. I’d really like to find her, though. She can have my man.

Mar 31, 2026

I once had a psychic girlfriend, she left me before we met.

Mar 31, 2026

The show “How I Met Your Mother” was just a really long TED talk.

Mar 31, 2026

The man who invented the Ferris wheel never met the man who invented the merry-go-round. They traveled in different circles.

Mar 31, 2026

Absent father sucks, but have you met the final boss, the father who is actually in your life every day but emotionally unavailable, lol.

Mar 30, 2026

Sorry for widening my eyes and whispering “The prophecy” when we first met.

Mar 30, 2026

Hey bartender, can you turn down the music, please? This guy I just met is trying to explain how baseball works.

Mar 30, 2026

Met my soulmate again today: mashed potatoes and gravy.

Mar 29, 2026

I would only enjoy the Met Gala if at the end of that runway they all walked into a volcano.

Mar 29, 2026

It’s freaking me out to think of how bad I’d look at the Met Gala.

Mar 29, 2026

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t turn into a disaster.

Mar 29, 2026

Have you ever met the human version of a headache?

Mar 29, 2026

You ever met someone so dumb you gotta take a deep breath before responding to them?

Mar 29, 2026

“Autism didn’t exist until recently!” Have you met old guys who work in hardware stores?

Mar 28, 2026