Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

I’m full of rage, but in a very chill and nonchalant way.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

Naturally introverted, selectively extroverted.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Windmill? Big fan.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Me at war: You guys mind if I leave a bit early today?

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

Babysitting a pair of twin babies right now and feeding them saying “here comes the airplane”. I don’t know, just feels weird.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

In an alternate universe, the hard way is always learning me.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

Does anyone play Trivial Pursuit anymore, or did it retire with the encyclopedias?

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

I came, I saw, I was disappointed, so I left.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

I love wearing sunglasses. Am I looking at your face? Am I looking at your ass? No one knows.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,748

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

Dying and being reincarnated as a beetle, and crawling to my old body’s grave, and digging down and living in my old ribcage.

Just shared via Messenger:

Kendrick inspires me to be a bigger, deeper, more passionate hater.

Trending via Reddit:

People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

Just shared via Messenger:

They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

Live now on Reddit:

Some people are so fake, their lock screens don’t recognize them.

Just landed via Twitch:

My toxic trait is consistently cutting off the resealable part of the bag of frozen vegetables.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

Spotted on Telegram:

My mother still has some really ugly things from the 90s. My older brother, for example.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Sex is like tacos. I wish I were having some now.

Freshly posted on X:

I have been putting a lot of thought into it, and I just don’t think being an adult is going to work for me.

How do I get my glasses prescription placed in my windshield?

4 weeks ago

Playful joke about blending glasses prescription with car windshields, humorous and witty text.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Why stop at glasses? Let’s just turn my car into a giant pair of binoculars! 🤓🚗🔍

funny question, glasses, humor, i, prescription, question, vision, windshield

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on Slack this month:

One of the great joys in this life is looking at your pet’s weird little teeth.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

Told someone I’m as “single as a pringle and as neato as a dorito” and they blocked me immediately.

61 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My girlfriend wants us to try couples counseling and I said we should use my therapist because he already knows what’s wrong with her.

100 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I was going to warn my kids about the repercussions of drugs and alcohol until I realized that they in fact were the repercussions of drugs and alcohol.

82 shares on YouTube this month:

I can now tell the hour of the day by which part of my body needs a heating pad.

54 shares on Facebook this month:

I have found that there is usually a lot of day left at the end of my patience.

75 shares on Instagram this month:

What part of “I need to save money” do I not understand?

13 shares on TikTok this month:

Toddlers will take your last nerve, deep fry it and eat it for breakfast.

98 shares on Snapchat this month:

Someday I will make a sandwich that will change my life forever.

36 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Nobody stresses a woman out more than a man who isn’t her man yet.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Wanna know a real adult life hack? Don’t tell anyone when you have a day off. Absolutely no one.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

So I used to wonder about people that paid a fortune for those little bottles of Evian water, until I read it backwards.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Go ahead and use that semi-colon; no one will know you’re doing it wrong.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

People always love to claim that a celebrity’s death is “unexpected”, but they never actually release the data on which celebrities they expected to die that day.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

Super excited about a brand new year full of questionable life choices.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Refusing to attend my brother’s gambling intervention until they agree to call it a slot shaming.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

Is my life this bad because I didn’t forward that email to 15 people back in 2007?

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

When kids try to guess your age it will either be completely flattering or utterly devastating, but never correct.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Fog. When nature is too lazy to load the complete environment.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

I avoid those club cameras like my life depends on it.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Everyone is a genius until they try to use someone else’s microwave.

Trending via Discord:

That pen in the junk drawer that hasn’t been used in four years picked today to have an attitude.

Spotted on Twitch:

Your girlfriend needs two hours to get ready. But if you don’t have your shoes on when she’s ready, you’re the problem.

Live now on Facebook:

Monday: The only day when you can wear the same outfit from the day before without anyone noticing.

Making waves on Facebook:

One day you’re young and fun, and the next you’re saying, “I wonder how old this tree is.”

Shared recently on Reddit:

Opinions are like air fryers. Everyone’s got one and they won’t stop banging on about them.

Trending via WhatsApp:

When you look this sexy, they should let you leave work early.

Making waves on Telegram:

Everyone has that one friend they’ve known for years and still have no idea what they actually do for a living, but it’s too late to ask.

Trending via WeChat:

I need one of those jobs they have in sitcoms, where it pays my rent but interferes with exactly zero of my social plans or situations.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

How do I get my glasses prescription placed in my windshield?

Why would I get married when it’s a well-known fact that only 50% of all marriages end in divorce?

Santa has the right idea: only visit people once a year, eat a snack, leave early.

I’m really hoping money falls from the sky this week, or else I’m doomed.

The best part about NYC is you literally see a brand new, hottest woman in your entire life every single day.

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

How do I get my glasses prescription placed in my windshield?

Keep the laugh going 😂

Sorry I can’t have a pleasant, safe and affordable life, my government said no.

Why would I get married when it’s a well-known fact that only 50% of all marriages end in divorce?

Santa has the right idea: only visit people once a year, eat a snack, leave early.

I’m really hoping money falls from the sky this week, or else I’m doomed.

The best part about NYC is you literally see a brand new, hottest woman in your entire life every single day.

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨