Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

Watching a movie and subtitles not syncing is low-key pain.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

Why can’t opportunity just come back later?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

That awkward moment when you’ve said “What?” three times, so you just say “Oh, yeah..” even though you have no idea what they said.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Living solo: where pants are optional, and snacks are unlimited.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

When you turn 50, they change the lightbulb in your fridge to that memory eraser from Men in Black.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

The biggest first-world problem is having your favorite makeup product be discontinued.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Saw a big spider crawl into my closet last night. He’s probably in there trying on all my clothes, acting like he’s me.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

There is literally no rule that says you have to get married and start a family. Normalize splitting a mansion with your five best friends and ten dogs.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,623

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Slack:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Everyone has these three colleagues: The one who is always cold. The one who is always hungry. The one who is always tired. I am everything in one.

Seen just now on Discord:

An evil genius rising to a position of power is bad but it makes sense at least. Feels insulting we’re constantly seeing evil idiots doing it instead.

Making waves on WeChat:

AI is that friend who is always there for you but gives terrible advice.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

What if i just replied “not now kitten daddy’s busy” to all my work emails?

Freshly posted on YouTube:

In an effort to keep our house clean before Thanksgiving, I’ve asked my family to go live somewhere else.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I haven’t given up on my fairy-tale ending. I still plan to be eaten by a wolf.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I can’t really explain it but cereal at night tastes better than cereal in the morning.

I can’t believe we became the adults in the most unaffordable period in history.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Guess we finally understand why Peter Pan never wanted to grow up! 🧚‍♂️🏠💸

adult, adults, affordability, believe, disbelief, economy, history, i, most, period, unaffordable

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Be the horrifying lore of your family’s lineage.

0

2 months ago

family, horror, humor, legacy, lineage, lore
Letting her be the passenger princess cause I care about my safety.

0

2 months ago

care, driving, humor, i, passenger, princess, relationship, safety
Only difference between me and someone in a psych ward is I’m outside.

0

2 months ago

awareness, difference, health, humor, joke, me, mental, mental health, mental health awareness, mental health joke, only, outside, psych, psychiatric, psychiatric ward, someone, ward
I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

0

2 months ago

fired, humor, i, job, joke, just, massage, parlor, people, reason, rub, specific, wrong, wrong way
Some nights I stay up hella late just farting.

0

6 months ago

bodily, bodily function, farting, function, habit, humor, i, just, late, late night habit, night, nights, stay, staying, staying up late
Expecting your first baby’s exciting, but have you ever ordered a new coffee machine?

0

2 months ago

baby, coffee, coffee machine, comparison, daily, daily life, ever, excitement, exciting, funny comparison, humor, life, machine, new, new purchase, parenting, purchase

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

36 shares on WeChat this month:

My laptop is overheating because I am doing a really good job.

83 shares on Facebook this month:

I suck at charging my phone, 21 percent charged, and I’m taking it off so I can lay the other way.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

What are some beginner bad habits for someone just getting into ruining their life?

45 shares on Facebook this month:

Vote for me and I’ll remove all the calories from cheese.

19 shares on Slack this month:

If he doesn’t like your fruit puns, you need to let that mango.

48 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Do we lazy people actually go to heaven? Or are we being picked up?

38 shares on YouTube this month:

If you wait until the last minute to do something, it only takes a minute to do it.

75 shares on Snapchat this month:

“Some things are better left unsaid,” I think to myself immediately after I hit send.

74 shares on Facebook this month:

Don’t even bother contacting me on the Ouija Board after I die. I barely answer my texts now.

68 shares on Snapchat this month:

And for my next trick, I will turn yesterday’s sweatpants into today’s sweatpants.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

How do I become a billionaire by 9 a.m. Monday? Please, it’s urgent.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

The sole purpose of your child’s middle name… is so they know when they’re really in trouble.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Got my dog microchipped, so if he runs away, I can just press a button, and he’ll explode.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

Set my sex robot to boyfriend mode and now it’s liking other girls’ pictures on Insta.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Just heard my knee crack so loud I expected it to glow in the dark.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Gravestone inscription: “Hey guys, I’m going to be taking a little break from social media”

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Why is there a level 6 for toasters? As if someone thinks: “Tonight I’m really in the mood for ashes with butter!”

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

I highly recommend having hobbies, it distracts you from falling in love unnecessarily.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

When people block me, I just assume it’s for my rugged good looks and killer jawline.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

Sorry for the things I said when the internet was down for 10 minutes.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Texting a man first feels like I’m on my hands and knees begging him to talk to me.

Live now on Discord:

I got bills. They’re multiplying.

Seen just now on Slack:

Call me old, but these days I just get excited to go home and lay down.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Being the forward-thinking person I am, I kept my winter fat through the summer.

Broadcasted on X:

The gaps in my resume are from the space bar.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I try not to laugh at my own jokes, but we all know I’m hilarious.

Going viral on Twitch:

Your Honor, that doesn’t sound like me.

Breaking via X:

Apparently, it’s rude to poke someone in the forehead and yell “Skip Intro” when they start talking to you.

Just landed via Reddit:

Super excited about a brand new week of self-sabotage.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I can’t believe we became the adults in the most unaffordable period in history.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Be the horrifying lore of your family’s lineage.

Letting her be the passenger princess cause I care about my safety.

Only difference between me and someone in a psych ward is I’m outside.

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Some nights I stay up hella late just farting.

Expecting your first baby’s exciting, but have you ever ordered a new coffee machine?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨