Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
🤷‍♂️ "I don't get mad, I get impressed with life's consistency in testing my patience. It's like a daily pop quiz I never asked for, but hey, let's roll with it. Bring it on, universe! 🙄"

acceptance, again, attitude, frustration, humor, i, just, mad, ok, reaction

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Man, it sucks having no kids. All I do is whatever I want, all the time.

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2 months ago

freedom, having, humor, i, kid, kids, lifestyle, man, parenting, sarcasm, sucks, time, want, whatever
That awesome moment when you open the fridge and the first thing you see is the thing you wanted to eat.

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2 months ago

awesome, craving, desire, eat, food, fridge, happiness, kitchen, moment, open, snack, surprise, thing, wanted
Did anyone ask the daylight if it wanted to be saved?

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2 months ago

daylight, humor, irony, perspective, question, saved, time, wanted
There’s no one I respect more than duck hunters. You spent $15,000 on a camouflage boat to outsmart a duck.

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2 months ago

boat, camouflage, duck, duck hunter, humor, hunter, hunting, i, money, outsmart, respect, spent
If my calculator had a history, it would be more embarrassing than my browser history.

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2 months ago

browser, calculator, embarrassing, history, humor, technology
I wish anxiety came with french fries.

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2 months ago

anxiety, came, comfort, comfort food, craving, food, french, french fry, fry, humor, i, irony, wish

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on X this month:

Alexa, take responsibility for my actions.

49 shares on Telegram this month:

A lot of men actually do forgive cheating, as long as their homies don’t know.

84 shares on Twitch this month:

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

90 shares on Snapchat this month:

At Christmas time, all outstanding invoices are always transferred with the reference “Hohoho”.

16 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I won’t rest until a cure for insomnia is found.

65 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m currently on a really effective diet called “I only have twenty dollars until payday”.

17 shares on Discord this month:

Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

27 shares on Discord this month:

The only difference between hungry and horny is where you insert the cucumber.

35 shares on Messenger this month:

“What’s your blood type?” I don’t know, boiling!

70 shares on YouTube this month:

If you drink enough, any bar can be a karaoke bar.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

The phrase “Treat yourself” has ruined my bank account and waistline.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

I have read the room and decided to be illiterate.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

Airlines be like: “Oh, wow. Oh, God. We didn’t think everyone would bring a bag!”

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

I am staying up till a million o’clock tonight.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Welcome to adulthood: 9pm is midnight now.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I say “huh,” then answer the question before you can repeat your question.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

I’m planning to eat the rich, but can I sub out fries for a salad?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

The history of mankind would have been completely different if Adam and Eve had been Chinese. They would have left the apple hanging and eaten the snake.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

As long as you’re still fishing fruit flies out of your drink, you’re not drunk.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

I don’t like to call it a xenomorph — I prefer the term “the alien from Alien.”

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

All my small talk is done with a car horn.

Making waves on YouTube:

The difference between the kids table and the adults table during holiday dinners is that there is much more screaming, crying, and arguing at the adults table.

Making waves on Telegram:

In medieval Europe, it was pretty easy to amass vast armies eager to go into battle and have their heads chopped off because no one wanted to be alive in medieval Europe.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Relationship tip: Make sure you’re the crazy one.

Making waves on TikTok:

We all have that one coworker whose sole purpose is to reduce our life expectancy by ten years.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

How do I gracefully leave this party early but also take the queso dip with me?

Trending via Pinterest:

When a woman texts you three questions, you should only answer one. She will love that.

Seen just now on Slack:

“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.

Going viral on YouTube:

Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

Just landed via Snapchat:

To all the people with grammatical issues, don’t worry, I also have problems with badly timed periods.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I don’t get mad anymore. I’m just like “again?” Ok then.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Man, it sucks having no kids. All I do is whatever I want, all the time.

That awesome moment when you open the fridge and the first thing you see is the thing you wanted to eat.

Did anyone ask the daylight if it wanted to be saved?

There’s no one I respect more than duck hunters. You spent $15,000 on a camouflage boat to outsmart a duck.

If my calculator had a history, it would be more embarrassing than my browser history.

I wish anxiety came with french fries.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨