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Commentary:
"Who needs commas when you've got attitude and sass like that? 💁‍♀️ Breathing is overrated anyways, just wing it like the grown adult you are! 😂 #NoCommasNoProblem"

adult, breathe, breathing, commas, frustration, grammar, hate, humor, i, job, punctuation, tell, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

That moment when you cut into a seedless watermelon and find out it’s only allegedly seedless.

0

2 months ago

cut, expectation, fruit, humor, moment, seed, surprise, watermelon
I love how a film can be life-changing for one person and boring for another.

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4 weeks ago

another, boring, entertainment, experience, film, i, life changing, love, person, personal, personal experience, perspective
Made a lot of mistakes in my life, but adding more cheese than a recipe calls for isn’t one of them.

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2 months ago

calls, cheese, cooking, food, humor, life, lot, mistake, mistakes, recipe
White guys have a slur for other white guys they don’t respect, it’s called ‘buddy.’

0

2 months ago

buddy, disrespect, guy, guys, humor, respect, slur, stereotype, white, white guy
Saying “You’re tearing this family apart” whenever someone argues with me.

0

1 month ago

apart, argument, conflict, drama, exaggeration, family, humor, me, saying, someone, tearing, whenever
What’s a polite way to tell someone you hope they get mauled by a bear?

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2 months ago

bear, dark, dark humor, hope, humor, mauled, polite, polite way, sarcasm, someone, tell

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on Threads this month:

Being single allows you to do a lot of things. For example, standing naked in the kitchen at night and eating cold pizza.

47 shares on Snapchat this month:

I hate the saying: “Get up, the sun is shining!” What am I supposed to do? Photosynthesis?

15 shares on Reddit this month:

Get off the internet and go sniff a flower.

80 shares on Instagram this month:

Did you know that it’s actually possible to say, “I don’t know enough about this to have an opinion”?

83 shares on Reddit this month:

If I like you I keep you close, if not I keep you at a distance so I can mime squishing your head between my thumb and forefinger.

78 shares on Facebook this month:

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.

19 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Good morning to everyone except the people who are missing the ability to read the room.

43 shares on Slack this month:

Half princess, half menace.

85 shares on X this month:

Y’all can keep the nonchalant ones — I want mine weak in the knees about me.

40 shares on TikTok this month:

A more accurate description would be ‘The Darker Web’.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought putting your heart and soul into a relationship would make it work.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

I’m about to start telling people, “As long as that makes sense to you,” when they say shit that doesn’t make sense to me.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

Coffee should just be free for anybody over 30.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Gravestone inscription: “Hey guys, I’m going to be taking a little break from social media”

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

Coconut water taste like it’s been in someone else’s mouth.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Life is strange. We come into the world with nothing, then we struggle for everything, and finally, we leave with nothing.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

They say time is the solution to every problem. I’ve been waiting for five hours already and the room is still messy.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Don’t tell me what to do unless you are naked.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

What electric cars and diarrhea have in common is the fear of not making it home.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

Seen just now on Instagram:

My greatest aspiration is to one day solve a murder on a train.

Shared recently on Telegram:

At bedtime, I ceremonially move the claw clip from my hair to the bag of chips, signifying the end of the day.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Thinking after a concert that the artist liked your city/show the most is like thinking the bartender flirted with you.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Today I told my daughter she’s giving me a headache! She told me “For suggestions and complaints, contact the manufacturer.”

Freshly posted on Slack:

Life is short, unless you’re listening to a kid describing an episode of PAW Patrol.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

The masculine urge to hitch your pants up after making a minor decision.

Breaking via Snapchat:

My only chance at a big house in the country is if I become a rescue dog.

Just shared via Messenger:

Americans can choose from over 1,000 breakfast cereals but only two presidential candidates?

Making waves on Threads:

Have you ever been sitting around overthinking about overthinking, and then wonder why you’re even thinking that?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I hate commas. It’s not my job to tell you when you breathe. Work it out, you’re a grown adult.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

That moment when you cut into a seedless watermelon and find out it’s only allegedly seedless.

I love how a film can be life-changing for one person and boring for another.

Made a lot of mistakes in my life, but adding more cheese than a recipe calls for isn’t one of them.

White guys have a slur for other white guys they don’t respect, it’s called ‘buddy.’

Saying “You’re tearing this family apart” whenever someone argues with me.

What’s a polite way to tell someone you hope they get mauled by a bear?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨