Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Folks, please have more respect for people with glasses. Because they pay money to see you.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

I made up all these romantic scenarios in my brain and you’re not following the script.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Half princess, half menace.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

I hate managing money, I was born to splurge.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

If you have children, you can experience all human emotions before 9 a.m. on Sundays.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

“I’ll just iron my clothes for work in the morning,” he thought in stupid bachelor.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Cats must think we’re so weird for constantly harvesting their poop.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Everyone is getting idioter.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

I want to be so rich that when I see a spider in my house I won’t kill it, I’d buy another house.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

760 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,922

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,922

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

Can’t, I’m pulling it together.

Trending via TikTok:

Establish dominance by showing up with all your childhood trophies.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

A wise man once said, “Bees don’t waste their time explaining to flies that honey is better than shit.”

Going viral on Messenger:

Some people are like clouds. When they go away it’s much better.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I’m at that age where I can no longer refer to other people as “elderly.”

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Every Reddit relationship post is like “My husband dropped a big piano on my head and when I emerged from the rubble my teeth had been replaced by the keys. Am I in the wrong?”

Just landed via Telegram:

They should invent a way to delete other people’s posts.

Shared recently on Discord:

Santa keeps a pair of mounted antlers over his fireplace to keep the reindeer from unionizing.

Reported on Facebook:

Some people don’t have a permanent handwriting. It depends on their mood and the pen they use.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I’m waiting for the perfect moment to stop procrastinating.

I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations.

I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
☕️ "I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations – it's like a daily ritual of preparing for disappointment with a side of caffeine kick! 😉"

, , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology think time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

760 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,922

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,922

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

I don’t know why doctors only give stickers to kids? Like, hello, I was also brave today.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

A peaceful transition of power happening between me and this cigarette just now.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Tired of being the responsible adult. When can I become the irresponsible adult?

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Men love to show you a YouTube video. It is a sign of deep respect in their culture.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

There is always enough for the needy, there is never enough for the greedy.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 40s, you now respond to every younger person telling you their age with “Jesus Christ”.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

Stop worrying if people like you. They don’t.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

This tape doesn’t even taste like scotch.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

April fools prank: replace all the sugar in your house with cocaine.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Discord:

Teaching myself ukulele! Neighbor keeping the beat on my wall!

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Shoutout to everyone pretending to have it together. Same.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Nobody told me that when you get a husband the ears are sold separately.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I am at the age where I question throwing away a box because, “It’s a really nice box.”

Reported on X:

Nobody could stop me if I wasn’t tired all the time.

Just shared via YouTube:

If I ever say “with all due respect”, please understand that there is none.

Just shared via Discord:

Not arguing with people anymore, I’m just gonna say “it makes sense that you would think that”.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Getting to know someone these days is impossible. No one is really single, everyone has something going on, is hung up on their ex or is otherwise damaged in some way.

Just landed via Reddit:

“I asked ChatGPT.” “I asked Grok.” Yeah, well, I just analyzed it from a Marxist perspective, and it was pretty obvious.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Okay, new plan, I’m going to marry a Kardashian.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴