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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

You can tell a lot about someone based on which Spice Girl they were most attracted to.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

It’s not ‘drinking alone’ if you’re at work.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

The only traditional costume people around me wear is sweatpants.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

Don’t worry. There is still hope for the summer: the rain should get warmer soon.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

If you’re wondering whether something is A.I. or not, A.I. has already won.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

No, they’re not “symptoms of depressions.” They’re Blue’s Clues.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

Diet tip: Your pants can’t get too tight if you never wear any.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,279

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

I hate it when someone gives me a valid solution to my problem and I have to find something new to complain about.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Not to brag, but I was unhinged way before it was cool.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Sometimes I glance over at my boyfriend, and he’s just looking at Google Maps, scrolling around.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Single introverts be like, “If it’s meant to be, my future love will simply teleport into my living room.”

Shared recently on Telegram:

If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s being annoyed by stupidity.

Just landed via X:

Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Breaking via Slack:

Bored as hell. Anyone want to emotionally manipulate each other?

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Is it fall yet? I really can’t suck my stomach in much longer.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Before Facebook, we would hold people hostage inside our homes by showing them photo albums of our vacation.

Breaking via YouTube:

That was the last cup of coffee in my life. From tomorrow I’ll be drinking straight from the pot.

I think some of you are faking your sarcasms.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Your sarcasm detector is either broken or set on stealth mode 😜🔍

faking, humor, i, sarcasm, think

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Twitter is like group therapy but everyone’s yelling and no one’s licensed.

0

2 months ago

discussion, group, group therapy, humor, licensed, media, online, online discussion, social, social media, therapy, Twitter, yelling
At the end of the day, it’s the friend that doesn’t take your ghosting phases personally.

0

2 months ago

day, end, friend, ghosting, humor, personal, phases, relationship, take
Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

0

2 months ago

activity, extrovert, hanging, hanging out, heartbreak, hours, introvert, isolation, punishment, sentence, social, social activity
The prime minister is a minister that is not divisible by any other minister.

0

2 months ago

divisible, humor, joke, language, minister, politics, prime, prime minister, wordplay
I may be sensitive, but everyone else could be a little kinder, too.

0

2 months ago

communication, else, empathy, everyone, feelings, humor, i, kinder, kindness, little, personality, sensitive, too
Isn’t your email address beautifulgirl@mydreams.com?

0

2 months ago

address, communication, email, email address, flirt, humor, identity, internet, line, online, online identity, pickup, pickup line, username

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on TikTok this month:

You either have a full ketchup bottle in your house or an almost empty one. There’s no in-between.

70 shares on Telegram this month:

Play your cards right and we could be wearing matching fanny packs this summer.

16 shares on Discord this month:

Self-discipline is tough because I’m the boss of me, and that guy runs a real loose ship.

25 shares on TikTok this month:

Why are fish the only thing you can monger? Let me monger some other stuff.

29 shares on Messenger this month:

You have to be careful about sending your spouse things on social media. You send too many things, next thing you know chores are being redistributed because of “all the free time you clearly have”.

61 shares on Snapchat this month:

Couldn’t afford a man cave. Had to settle for a gazebro.

46 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m only here to test your patience, but like, in a sexy way.

67 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Why have abs when you can have kebabs?

23 shares on Instagram this month:

Chugging a woman’s entire drink at the bar and then saying “you’re safe, there is nothing in your drink.”

54 shares on Pinterest this month:

Can you turn your swag off for one second and listen?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

I’m not here to make friends, just noise.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

I waste a lot of time putting my phone down to just pick it back up again.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

If someone else makes you a sandwich, it’s always better than if you do it yourself. It’s the same with sex.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Is it still murder if they said, “Some other time,” but I thought they said smother time?

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

The delivery guy absolutely hates it when I call him my pizza mule.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Social media needs to crash for like a year so everybody can snap back into reality.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

Everyone’s “the nicest guy ever” until the cops are in their backyard digging up several bodies.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

I hate it when what’s wrong asks me what’s wrong.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

This family has a lot of nerve wearing all these clothes after I just did laundry.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on YouTube:

I’m just impressed by how ugly I’m willing to look in public these day.

Breaking via WeChat:

I made some bad choices in life, but I never bought a pair of Crocs.

Just landed via Pinterest:

How do they know an animal is extinct? Like, have you really looked everywhere?

Just shared via Slack:

I miss my Dad opening the windows and talking about cross-ventilation.

Seen just now on Threads:

I wish people would stop holding back and use social media to tell us how they really feel.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Foolproof? Yeah, well we’ll see about that.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Life is just a series of obstacles preventing you from reading your book.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

“Well, at least things can’t get any worse” has turned out to be a failure of my imagination.

Just landed via Messenger:

You’re in her DMs. I’m accidentally reposting reels of Tibetan foxes because I don’t know how to use the app anymore.

Making waves on Slack:

It’s hard to sleep knowing that cake is in the fridge.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I think some of you are faking your sarcasms.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Twitter is like group therapy but everyone’s yelling and no one’s licensed.

At the end of the day, it’s the friend that doesn’t take your ghosting phases personally.

Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

The prime minister is a minister that is not divisible by any other minister.

I may be sensitive, but everyone else could be a little kinder, too.

Isn’t your email address beautifulgirl@mydreams.com?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨