Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Remember, it's all about the rock 'n' roll theatrics! 🤘🎸 Act like every chord is a dramatic battle against gravity and watch the audience be in awe of your musical suffering! 😂 #GuitarHero"

always, attitude, band, guitar, humor, hurt, music, performance, play, sure

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I am never hungrier than when I leave the dentist and told I can’t eat right away.

0

2 months ago

am, away, dentist, eat, eating, food, humor, hunger, i, irony, leave, never, restriction, right, told
If they don’t look at you like you’re magic, disappear like Houdini.

0

2 months ago

attention, disappear, Houdini, humor, magic, mystery, relationship, self-worth
I’m really getting tired of being a responsible adult.

0

3 months ago

adult, adulthood, being, frustration, getting, humor, life, responsibility, responsible, tired
Is it just my dad, or do all fathers watch videos on their phones with the volume full blast, with no concern for anyone else in the house?

0

3 weeks ago

anyone, blast, concern, dad, distraction, else, family, father, full, habit, house, humor, just, loud, phone, phones, video, videos, volume, watch
When I finally snap it’ll be because I had to type my email address in on the TV.

0

2 months ago

address, annoyance, email, frustration, humor, i, technology, TV, type, typing
Currently helping my husband look for his $20 I spent yesterday.

0

2 months ago

couple, funny situation, humor, husband, irony, lost, lost money, money, relationship, search, situation, spending, yesterday

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

78 shares on TikTok this month:

There’s a fat man inside me dying to get out.

87 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t follow washing instructions, you’re my clothes you don’t tell me what to do.

59 shares on X this month:

I’m sick of getting woken up at 6am by the bin men. I just want a nice sleep but they always insist that I get out of the bin before they collect it.

82 shares on Reddit this month:

Are you gonna confess your undying love for me or what, bro?

20 shares on Reddit this month:

I hate when people ask me what I meant by something. Listen, I have no idea. I’m as confused here as you are. We’re both learning what I’m about to say at the exact same time.

85 shares on Discord this month:

This meeting could have been an unread email.

70 shares on X this month:

A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it’s the stupid ones who need advice.

35 shares on Pinterest this month:

I don’t like violence, but I don’t mind if I get hit by luck.

10 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Thinking about stepping down from being an adult, I’m just not in the right headspace for this position right now. I really appreciate the opportunity though.

91 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I wish I could join, but I’m busy plotting revenge because my kids laughed when I showed them I can shake it better than Shakira.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Some people are like ads, just skip.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

On the surface: cool as a cucumber. On the inside: squirrel in traffic.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Nothing prepared me for the part of adulthood where you look like a baby deer learning to walk every time you get out of bed in the morning.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

Get off the internet and go sniff a flower.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

The person opposite me has a donut. I do not have a donut. That should be my donut. This person is now my arch nemesis.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

Toothpaste sure knows how to ruin whatever you’re drinking.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

When I say I’m tired, the “of people” is silent.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

Accidentally used men’s shower gel today, and I can already feel myself lying for no reason.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

WhatsApp needs to remove that “this message was deleted” notification. It’s unnecessary drama.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

The Airbnb reviews never tell you how comfortable the toilets are for falling asleep on.

Just landed via Twitch:

Behind every strong, independent woman… is a dog that follows her to the bathroom.

Freshly posted on X:

I just heard someone refer to Texas as “Howdy Arabia” and I still haven’t stopped laughing.

Just landed via TikTok:

That very depressing moment when you find out the fire alarm that went off at work was just a test.

Making waves on WeChat:

I lied. There’s no sex. Can you help me put this fitted sheet on my mattress?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I put the ‘no’ in ‘I will let u know’.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I’m glad it’s not snowing. I can’t imagine shoveling snow in this heat.

Just shared via Reddit:

All I think about is death and sex.

Just shared via TikTok:

They should invent a day where it all works out.

Going bananas on Telegram:

In honor of the winter solstice, I also will be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If you play guitar in a band, always make sure to look like it hurts to play.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I am never hungrier than when I leave the dentist and told I can’t eat right away.

If they don’t look at you like you’re magic, disappear like Houdini.

I’m really getting tired of being a responsible adult.

Is it just my dad, or do all fathers watch videos on their phones with the volume full blast, with no concern for anyone else in the house?

When I finally snap it’ll be because I had to type my email address in on the TV.

Currently helping my husband look for his $20 I spent yesterday.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨