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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

I know how to use an abacus as a tambourine.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

Oh good. Another day.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

If I had a bf, I’d be a gf.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

God: “Free will was a bad idea. I should have charged for it.”

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Just saw the fattest bird. This guy must get up early as hell.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

What I lack in moves on the dance floor, I more than make up for in dancing around a conversation.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

Me watching any modern ad: How is this ad an ad for the thing it’s an ad for?

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

Whoever’s been in charge of the weather for the last few weeks seems to have fallen asleep on the couch with the remote control in their hand.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

The only thing Flat Earthers have to fear is sphere itself.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,548

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Messenger:

Don’t ever let your computer feel that you’re in a hurry, cause they’re gonna slow down more.

Spotted on Facebook:

Proverbs are so mean. Like, I don’t deserve any worm because I woke up at 11am? Like, no worm at all?

Spotted on Snapchat:

Probably the most empowered I’ve ever felt was that time I stuck a fork in a socket.

Going viral on Twitch:

According to my chocolate advent calendar, tomorrow is Christmas.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I like liking Instagram stories because I like pressing buttons.

Just shared via Telegram:

Starting your most incoherent sentence with “put simply” to deflect blame onto the reader.

Trending via Telegram:

This December is not Decembering like the other Decembers Decembered.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

“You’re always drinking wine!” God forbid a girl enjoys the first miracle of Jesus.

Trending via Discord:

Responding to all selfies with “this should work.”

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

People say opposites attract, but I say find a partner who’s deranged in the same ways you are and double your capacity to be annoying.

I’m sorry your man wears his sunglasses on the back of his head.

0
I’m sorry your man wears his sunglasses on the back of his head.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Looks like his fashion sense is stuck in the '90s 😎🙈 Maybe he thinks it's a 'cool' way to look out for his exes behind him 👀🕶️ #ThrowbackThursday"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t care if it’s cliché, I will always enjoy a ‘small town but something messed up is happening’ story.

26 shares on TikTok this month:

Most women need a little reassurance. Like when she says “oh, you want to see crazy?” Reassure her that you do not.

29 shares on Facebook this month:

Every outdoor cat should be given a little cowboy hat and a gun.

43 shares on WeChat this month:

Contrary to what we currently believe, we don’t choose afternoon naps. Afternoon naps choose us.

31 shares on Telegram this month:

I forgot how weird November is. There’s no afternoon; it’s just night after 3 p.m.

82 shares on Pinterest this month:

Vegan zombies be like: GRAINS!

89 shares on Instagram this month:

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

98 shares on Instagram this month:

I hate when recipes tell you to take something out of the pan and add it back in later. No way bro. It’s staying in there.

33 shares on YouTube this month:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

24 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m the person who requested weather reporters stand in the storms. I have no concept of wind or rain and love seeing needless suffering.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I love it when God gives me money.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

The best part about filling out doctor appointment forms online is when you get there and they say “hello, please fill out these forms!”

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m glad nobody can see the face I make when I’ve just started the washing machine and then spot a sock on the floor.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

With no training whatsoever, I took out myself and the other two people exiting the ski lift in one fell swoop.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I bet there’s a couple of seconds on that medieval torture stretcher rack where it feels incredible.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I told the trees what you did. Be wary when you enter the forest next.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Girl cats get named after ancient goddesses and boy cats get named after Taco Bell menu items.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

My CV is so good, companies are still reading it for 9 months.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember when we were young and said “I’ll sleep when i’m older”? Well, now we can’t when we want to.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,323

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Plot twist: the universe is waiting for you to give it a sign.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

I used to be so graceful, now I am like a puppy with a box stuck on her head.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

If you start liking someone, just block them. Follow me for more relationship advice.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Of course, a wife can complain to her mother-in-law. She has every right to complain to the manufacturer.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

I miss whatever age I was when I thought five dollars was a lot of money.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Men’s jeans have bigger pockets to help them carry all their audacity.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Am I just getting old or are people getting more annoying?

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

No, I wasn’t dancing. I got harassed by a bumble bee.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Disney set unrealistic standards of how often woodland creatures would help me clean and do laundry if I just sang out my window.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Have kids so you can say things you never thought you would like “please don’t vacuum your sister”

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

I love all mythical creatures. Vampires, werewolves, unicorns, kids who listen.

Making waves on Twitch:

Buying books and reading them are actually two entirely different hobbies.

Trending via Reddit:

Twitter is fun because you can tweet about hashbrowns and someone will say you are responsible for genocide.

Trending via Reddit:

Let’s hope those bridges you burn keep you warm at night.

Live now on Discord:

If your family starts fighting on Thanksgiving, go live.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Men be like, “You’ve been different ever since I disrespected you.”

Going bananas on YouTube:

Family fistfights brought to you by Monopoly.

Spotted on Slack:

Asbestos? I’m doing asbestos I can.

Going viral on Reddit:

Back to the Future and chill?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The early bird gets to cry for a little bit longer in the work parking lot.

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