Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

I’m so grateful when people tell me to drive safe, cause then I remember not to drive off that cliff.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

I miss my kids the most when they go to bed and the mosquitoes go after me because they have no other options.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

Every squad has that person who has to go home early.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

“Well, at least things can’t get any worse” has turned out to be a failure of my imagination.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

Screen time so high, I should send another risky message and then ignore my cell phone for three days.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

We were supposed to have flying cars and other cool stuff, but instead we have AI videos showing Michael Jackson eat at McDonald’s.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

I made a resolution to eat better and exercise in the new year but didn’t specify which year I was referring to.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

According to the amount of bacon I just cooked. I’m a family of 8.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

Victor Frankenstein being only 23 years old when he made the monster is crazy to me, he should have been at the club.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,339

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Slack:

November should have one more day. Just because to me November 31st sounds real. And also I don’t want to pay rent tomorrow.

Making waves on Facebook:

Grant me the serenity to supernaturally change the things I cannot accept.

Shared recently on Slack:

Harmonicas are basically for people who like to hear music while they spit.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I need to know the brand of toothbrush my neighbor has. I hear it buzzing sometimes an hour at a time and she’s clearly enjoying it.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Tryna choke on gummy bears so my tombstone can read ‘killed by a bear’

Live now on Slack:

How do I become a billionaire by 9 a.m. Monday? Please, it’s urgent.

Trending via YouTube:

In the future, there will be grandmas who can’t bake but have tattoos on their backs.

Seen just now on Reddit:

It’s important to remember that even parents make mistakes. In fact, it’s how many of us became parents.

Just landed via Messenger:

Sorry for running at you on all fours, I was excited to see you.

Trending via TikTok:

Pumpkin spice season comes earlier every year and yet some still deny climate change.

Is anyone else really scared for how stupid and illiterate the next generations are gonna be?

3 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Just waiting for the day when kids say "LOL" instead of laughing out loud, oh wait… 📚🤷‍♂️😂

anyone, concern, education, else, fear, future, generation, generations, illiteracy, illiterate, next, scared, stupid, stupidity, youth

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Lost my Thesaurus. Gutted. Really gutted. Like absolutely gutted.

0

2 months ago

gutted, humor, irony, loss, lost, Thesaurus, vocabulary, wordplay
Obituaries should have clickbait titles.

0

2 months ago

clickbait, death, humor, irony, obituary, satire, should, title, titles
Dinosaurs never had coffee, and we see how that turned out.

0

2 months ago

caffeine, coffee, dinosaur, dinosaurs, extinction, humor, irony, prehistoric
The older I get, the more I understand why Grumpy Old Men exist.

0

2 months ago

age-related, aging, comedy, exist, grumpy, humor, i, men, old, old men, older, understand, understanding, why
Quitting my job to focus on being in love.

0

2 months ago

being, focus, humor, job, love, priorities, quitting, relationship, romance
I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

0

2 months ago

2015, after, bed, disaster, experiment, great, honey, i, mishap, relationship, stopped

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on Slack this month:

“I asked Grok.” “I asked ChatGPT.” Well, I asked R2D2, and he said you’re a loser.

99 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Hand sanitizer will find a cut you didn’t even know you had.

30 shares on Telegram this month:

I use karate strictly as a last resort, after I’ve exhausted fleeing and screaming.

19 shares on Slack this month:

Thank god I played a lot of Tetris as a kid or I never would have been able to get everything into the freezer.

90 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“You don’t load the dishwasher right,” I said to my wife just before it permanently became my job.

50 shares on Discord this month:

It’s my birthday, but I’m not gonna post about it for attention like some kind of loser.

34 shares on TikTok this month:

I should’ve been a crow. They get to fly around looking goth as hell and seeking retribution. Instead, I have to go to an office and work on my ‘people skills.’

59 shares on Threads this month:

I need a vacation, but the kind where everyone else leaves, and I have my house to myself for a few days.

80 shares on Telegram this month:

Might mess around and reply, “That sounds like a you problem,” to every work email today.

43 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you take a social media sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last post something fun like “I wonder if there’s a bear in this cave?”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

The week between Christmas and New Year’s should be studied as it is clearly a wormhole, disturbing time and space.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

Not a fan of frozen pizza. Too cold, in my opinion.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Yes, I’d love to learn your family card game. I’m sure it won’t be excruciating at all.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Got a botched circumcision, now my willy wonka.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

I just shaved my legs and man, the next 7 minutes and 34 seconds before it starts growing back is gonna feel amazing.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

Bugs Bunny taught me that my choices aren’t limited to fight or flight, I can also pretend I’m a pretty lady.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

I know how to use an abacus as a tambourine.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

Plot Twist: Your taxes cheated on you.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

My cat just knocked over my coffee mug and looked at me like it was my fault. How dare I put it on the edge of the table?

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Love when a doctor emails me about my “outstanding bill”. If it’s so good, why don’t you pay it?

Live now on Twitch:

Life hack: you don’t need salt if you just cry into your dinner.

Shared recently on Slack:

Every Friday, I’m like, “This weekend I’m getting my life together,” and then… I don’t.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I appreciate the interest, but I’m officially removing myself from the running to be the next James Bond. Thank you for your understanding.

Shared recently on Discord:

A two-step guide to warning someone not to hit their head: 1. Wait until they’ve hit their head. 2. Say “Ooh, mind your head!”

Shared recently on Messenger:

I’m not an idiot anymore, universe, please stop with the lessons.

Seen just now on Threads:

When I said I wanted to be held, I didn’t mean accountable.

Shared recently on Threads:

Have you ever been so stressed that you’re calm?

Trending via Reddit:

The older I get, the more I walk like Charlie Chaplin.

Going viral on YouTube:

Do not EVER text while driving. Please use the giant iPad attached to your dashboard.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Is anyone else really scared for how stupid and illiterate the next generations are gonna be?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Lost my Thesaurus. Gutted. Really gutted. Like absolutely gutted.

Obituaries should have clickbait titles.

Dinosaurs never had coffee, and we see how that turned out.

The older I get, the more I understand why Grumpy Old Men exist.

Quitting my job to focus on being in love.

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨