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Commentary:
🤫 When faced with a tricky situation, just remember: nothing says "mature adult" like going straight to the source! 😂💁‍♀️👩‍👦 Brace yourself… mom's on speed dial!

adult, communication, handle, humor, mature, mature adult, mom, reaction, responsibility, telling

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

You are why Superman costumes have warning labels telling you the costume won’t make you fly.

0

2 months ago

costume, costume safety, fly, flying, humor, label, labels, safety, superhero, superman, Superman costume, telling, warning, warning label, why
It’s never too early to start making bad decisions.

0

2 months ago

advice, bad, bad decision, decision, decisions, early, early start, humor, life, life advice, making, never, procrastination, start, too
I get so crabby when strangers waste my time which is unfair to them because I waste almost all of my own time to begin with.

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2 months ago

crabby, humor, i, irony, own, self-reflection, strangers, time, unfair, waste
There should be a way to take back a compliment bestowed upon a person who doesn’t acknowledge it well.

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2 months ago

acknowledgment, back, compliment, humor, interaction, irony, person, sarcasm, self-awareness, should, social, social interaction, take, upon, well
The magician told me to “Pick a card! Any card!” So I took his Visa.

0

2 months ago

card, humor, i, joke, magic, magician, me, pick, told, trick, Visa
I’m not making any resolutions. I think it’s time for the years to be better, not me.

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2 months ago

better, humor, i, making, me, resolution, Resolutions, self-improvement, think, time, year’s

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on Messenger this month:

If my wife and I got divorced and moved to separate states, I’m convinced I would still hear her chewing.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If someone steals your joke, you have to file a LOLsuit.

97 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Having a girlfriend is insane because you can literally go to touch them, and they will let you.

87 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m a big fan of that post-laundry feeling when you’ve got all your A-list clothes back in the game.

55 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Failed relationships can be described as so much wasted make-up.

39 shares on X this month:

Being a writer means having a story you want everyone in the world to read, except anyone who knows you.

14 shares on TikTok this month:

I relate to a rooster because I also want start off my day by screaming.

64 shares on Telegram this month:

Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.

38 shares on YouTube this month:

I only went to medical school to figure out where your arms are supposed to go when you sleep and they didn’t even teach us that.

82 shares on Twitch this month:

Took control of my life today and canceled my AOL subscription.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

He died doing what he did best, trying to get a croc to wear a Croc.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

A funny thing about the Heimlich Maneuver is that it’s impossible to pronounce if you’re choking.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Happy Earth Day. You don’t look a day over 4 billion years and get hotter every year.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m just here trying to spread a little joy while the world burns. Is that so wrong?

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Growing old is a process of saying “it’s probably nothing,” with increasing frequency and increasingly being wrong.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Never in my life have I heard my dad sneeze at an acceptable volume.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

October is the situationship of months. So briefly beautiful, but you know the horrors are imminent.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Quitting a job is not enough. I need them to go out of business when I leave.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

Tequila won’t fix your life, but it’s worth a shot.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

My life is just a series of awkward moments separated by snacks.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

My favorite game is guessing if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor posture, or a brain tumor.

Just landed via X:

I just really hope The Weeknd’s real name isn’t Mnday.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they’re the ones who can sign you into a home.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I’m not sure what everyone at my coworking space does for work, but I’m pretty sure one guy’s job is chewing.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Remember: when a band skips your city on tour, it is always personal and they always hate you specifically.

Breaking via Slack:

Most of my shoulder workout comes from shrugging when people ask me questions.

Making waves on Discord:

People who ask “Can I call you” are so sweet. Like, obviously you cannot, but so sweet.

Just shared via Messenger:

I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time.

Just shared via Twitch:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here pumping gas until the dollar amount ends with 0.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

On the next episode of Hoarders, they visit my subconscious.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’ve decided to handle this like a mature adult, I’m telling your mom.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

You are why Superman costumes have warning labels telling you the costume won’t make you fly.

It’s never too early to start making bad decisions.

I get so crabby when strangers waste my time which is unfair to them because I waste almost all of my own time to begin with.

There should be a way to take back a compliment bestowed upon a person who doesn’t acknowledge it well.

The magician told me to “Pick a card! Any card!” So I took his Visa.

I’m not making any resolutions. I think it’s time for the years to be better, not me.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨