Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

My day starts backwards, I wake up tired and I go to bed wide awake.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

What happened to my ankles tonight mosquitologically can never happen again.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Airbnb should have an option if you just want to use someone’s bathroom for a few minutes.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

“You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

I’m a bit of a traditionalist, so on my birthday, I smear my body with embryonic fluid.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a kid that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

If you fall asleep long enough, the steering wheel gives you a pillow.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

What if i just replied “not now kitten daddy’s busy” to all my work emails?

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

They invented the word metallic, because irony was already taken.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

Who needs dystopian fiction when you can watch the news?