Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Feeling like Floyd in this May weather (illiterate and violent).

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

When I was a kid, no phones or tablets. We just read the cereal box at breakfast.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

NFTs were less about the money and more about the friends you scammed along the way.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

On a first date, saying “agree to disagree” every time they share anything about themselves.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

If you drink enough, any bar can be a karaoke bar.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

The only time anyone should watch the news is to study how psychological manipulation works on the general public.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

All these deadlines, but it’s you I want to meet.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Got fired on my first day working at the drugstore for calling my new coworkers ‘my pharmily’.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

The feminine urge to act clueless while knowing everything.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,580

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Snapchat:

Only difference between me and someone in a psych ward is I’m outside.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

The audacity of my parents’ oldies station now playing 80s music.

Breaking via Threads:

Meetings are great because who doesn’t like being held hostage?

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

You’re over 35. Better go pee before you leave, pee when you get there, pee while you’re there, and pee before you leave.

Trending via Pinterest:

Isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like ‘I don’t know how to hold a pencil.’

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Superwoman: Single. Batman: Single. Wonder Woman: Single. I get it now, I’m single because I’m a superhero.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Me to HR: Okay, but you have to admit that was funny.

Shared recently on Reddit:

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Wearing expensive perfume to work feels like such a waste. This should be under someone’s full body weight, not in a corporate setting.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Reading for pleasure implies the existence of reading for pain. They’re calling it a PhD.

Microwaves have zero chill. We get it, time is up. Calm down.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like my microwave missed its calling as a motivational speaker who only knows one line! ⏰😆

calm, chill, humor, impatience, microwave, time, zero

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Moment of silence for those who received mugs that aren’t microwave- and dishwasher-safe.

0

2 months ago

dishwasher, everyday, everyday life, gift, humor, kitchen, life, microwave, moment, mug, safety, sarcasm, silence
Getting up early would be easier if we could keep our eyes closed.

0

2 months ago

closed, early, easier, eyes, getting, humor, keep, sleep, struggle, waking
The meteorologist who devised the wind chill factor has died. He was 86, but he felt like 75.

0

2 months ago

age, chill, cold, death, died, factor, humor, joke, meteorologist, temperature, weather, wind, wind chill
Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

0

5 months ago

able, anger, being, drama, flip, flip phone, frustration, humor, miss, nostalgia, phone, shut
Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

0

2 months ago

beginning, cars, deer, front, humor, irony, sacrifice, throw, understand, understanding, wildlife
Guys with grey in their beards will do that thing you like.

0

2 months ago

attraction, beard, beards, charm, dating, grey, grey beard, guy, guys, humor, relationship, thing

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on Messenger this month:

Anyone else think it’s weird how cancer kills more people than any other astrological sign.

59 shares on Snapchat this month:

Why does tiredness on the couch not follow me to the bed?

93 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m a big fan of that post-laundry feeling when you’ve got all your A-list clothes back in the game.

86 shares on Discord this month:

I came home to find my boyfriend mopping the floor and my first thought was, “who’d he kill?”

82 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t have any patience because it takes too long.

22 shares on Discord this month:

Some people you look at or hear talking and think to yourself, the wheel may be turning, but the hamster is dead.

47 shares on WeChat this month:

The funniest thing I heard an elder say, “My generation had Wonder Woman, your generation has to wonder if it’s a woman.”

50 shares on Reddit this month:

Me, aged 20: This is internship summer. I will get an internship. I will find a job. I will study. I will read. I will learn piano. I will… Me, nowadays: This summer, I’m going to try all of the ice cream flavors.

30 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m tired and drank a lot of coffee, so now I’m tired but faster.

26 shares on Twitch this month:

One of the benefits of being my friend is that you can come to my house in your pajamas, no make-up, and look like crap and I won’t judge you.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Some people shop for designer heels. I shop for nonstop flight deals.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

Fun fact: The US was originally not meant to be a reality TV show.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

I’ve never wrestled an angry alligator, but I have taken off a wet sports bra in the middle of summer. So, same thing.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Someday I’ll learn how to emotion like a proper human.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

I lied, I’m jealous. I hope every girl who looks at you gets clipped by a meteor.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

Netflix will help you finish the name of the movie you’re typing, and then tell you they don’t have it.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Enjoy it now because you’re only going to get older and fatter.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

Sometimes I sneeze so loud and hard I think I’m a dad.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

In your 20s, you’ll meet a short man. It’s very important you jump over him.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

People without a sense of humor should not be allowed to decide what people with a sense of humor are allowed to laugh at.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

That awkward moment between birth and death.

Going viral on X:

Having leftover pizza for breakfast is an actual blessing.

Spotted on YouTube:

Sex in the snow is wintercourse.

Just landed via Slack:

My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes.

Going viral on WeChat:

My cat and I talked it over and no we don’t think that I’m crazy.

Just landed via Slack:

The shitshow must go on.

Making waves on Messenger:

Shout out to everyone who cooks at 180°C for 20 minutes, no matter what the instructions say.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

These days, I only use Facebook as a birthday calendar.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Microwaves have zero chill. We get it, time is up. Calm down.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Moment of silence for those who received mugs that aren’t microwave- and dishwasher-safe.

Getting up early would be easier if we could keep our eyes closed.

The meteorologist who devised the wind chill factor has died. He was 86, but he felt like 75.

Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

Guys with grey in their beards will do that thing you like.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨