Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

The answer is always no, I did not get enough sleep.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

Don’t give up, we must remain silly.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

My favorite color is money.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

Nasa is launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens. They’re calling it the Apollo G.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

I wonder how much time The Weeknd saves not typing that extra e.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Winter. You get up, drink coffee and then it gets dark.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

I want to make you say, “Oh God,” in a way that makes God nervous.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

When they make a Hate Island, somebody link me.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

Behind every funny man is a woman who rolls her eyes.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

244 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,513

Funny Quotes Topics

17,581

Funny Quotes Images

15,513

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,362

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Instagram:

Feeling morally and spiritually adrift without a Sunday HBO show.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Why did Star Wars Episodes 4, 5 & 6 come out before 1,2 & 3? Because in charge of directing, Yoda was.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Non-parents be like: I would simply instruct the toddler to do something he doesn’t want to do, and he would obey.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Rehab is a great place to meet people that like Piña Coladas and getting caught in the rain.

Going viral on WeChat:

Some people can start a task and then just finish it instead of trying to do a hundred things at once, like a squirrel on crack.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Accidentally made eye contact with the sweets at the grocery store and now have to declare bankruptcy.

Seen just now on Telegram:

At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

Spotted on Twitch:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

Seen just now on Instagram:

My hobby is misidentifying dinosaurs so my daughter can correct me.

My my husband’s favorite thing is when I blame him for losing something that’s actually in my hand.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like your husband quickly learned that being the scapegoat is just another "handy" skill in marriage! 🤭👐 #BlameGameChampion

blame, favorite, hand, humor, husband, i, losing, relationship, something, thing

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I am thinking of watching a movie with my boyfriend. Can anyone recommend a good boyfriend?

0

2 months ago

activity, boyfriend, entertainment, fun, fun activity, good, movie, recommendation, relationship
Kinda sucks that the prize for washing your laundry is getting to fold your laundry.

0

2 months ago

chores, domestic, domestic life, fold, folding, getting, humor, irony, laundry, life, prize, sucks, washing
This post is invisible, and only those going to Hell can see it.

0

5 months ago

going, hell, humor, invisible, joke, media, only, post, secret, social, social media, spooky
Are there any medium rappers? They’re always Big or Lil.

0

2 months ago

always, big, comedy, humor, Lil, medium, music, rapper, wordplay
The medicine for headache goes to the stomach to do what, exactly?

0

2 months ago

exactly, headache, humor, medicine, question, stomach
Single bells, single bells, single all the way. Oh, what fun it is to watch those couples fight all day, yay!

0

1 month ago

bell, couple, couples, day, fight, fun, holiday, humor, oh, relationship, single, watch, yay

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

46 shares on Reddit this month:

My mom didn’t raise a fool. Possibly a psycho, but never a fool.

52 shares on Messenger this month:

I fondly remember my days as a younger man when I didn’t care what the weather was going to do.

91 shares on Instagram this month:

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

Me, gently telling my kids that I ate the rest of the ice cream: Your dad ate the rest of the ice cream.

63 shares on Messenger this month:

Lady on the streets, Cheeto crumbs in my sheets.

78 shares on WeChat this month:

Women are like a fitted sheet. No matter what you do or how hard you try, they just never seem to cooperate.

36 shares on TikTok this month:

The shitshow must go on.

47 shares on Facebook this month:

“I asked ChatGPT.” “I asked Grok.” Yeah, well, I just analyzed it from a Marxist perspective, and it was pretty obvious.

28 shares on Reddit this month:

“Help us improve Instagram!” Nice try, fix your own damn website.

53 shares on Telegram this month:

Someone asked me how much I normally spend on a bottle of wine. Answering “usually an hour” wasn’t the right answer. I know this now.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

As someone who lives on earth, rising sea levels are alarming. But as someone who has always wanted to be a mermaid, I’m intrigued.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

According to the amount of bacon I just cooked, I’m 4 people.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

Nobody says, ‘Bless you,’ when you fart.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

If I ever go missing, check the snack aisle. I’m probably just deciding.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

My guardian angel is taking the longest smoking break in recorded history.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

You had me at “We’ll make it look like an accident.”

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

I will never be the person this serving size suggestion wants me to be.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Always be kind. You never know who might own a hot tub.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

Y’all scared to be single, I’m scared to be in another pointless relationship.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

I need the youth to start reading. Even if it’s the tag on your underwear. Read it.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Twitch:

“Cut my life into pieces” screamed the earthworm and threw itself in front of my spade.

Trending via Discord:

It’s a good thing that our phones only convey sight and sound. No offense, but from most of you I would never want to receive a smelfie!

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Hi, I’m a social media user, you might know me from such hits as “I’m leaving this stupid place” and “I’m back everybody.”

Making waves on Telegram:

I have never read a Hacker News thread where any of the commenters seemed as if their life contained joy.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Me: Please let me sleep! Brain: Nope, we have to stay up together and go over every bad life decision we have made so far.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

Spotted on X:

An entire generation is currently studying for jobs that will not exist.

Just landed via Messenger:

Feeling like a bug without his rug.

Shared recently on Telegram:

DUI stands for: don’t Uber, I got this.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My my husband’s favorite thing is when I blame him for losing something that’s actually in my hand.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I am thinking of watching a movie with my boyfriend. Can anyone recommend a good boyfriend?

Kinda sucks that the prize for washing your laundry is getting to fold your laundry.

This post is invisible, and only those going to Hell can see it.

Are there any medium rappers? They’re always Big or Lil.

The medicine for headache goes to the stomach to do what, exactly?

Single bells, single bells, single all the way. Oh, what fun it is to watch those couples fight all day, yay!

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨