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Commentary:
Ah-choo! 😈 Beware my sneezes, for they are so powerful that they could summon demons from the depths of the Middle Ages! 👻 Who knew my nasal exorcism skills were so legendary? 🤧 #SneezeGoals #PossessedByDemons

age, ages, belief, context, demon, humor, middle, middle age, people, possession, reaction, reason, sneeze

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Yawning is the body’s way of telling you it has only 15% battery remaining.

0

2 months ago

battery, body, energy, humor, sleep, tired, yawning
My daughter’s new Bluetooth karaoke mic has suddenly and mysteriously disappeared, and we are all just so, so sad that we can’t find it.

0

6 months ago

Bluetooth, daughter, disappeared, family, item, just, karaoke, karaoke mic, lost, lost item, mic, mystery, new, sad, sadness
Why do boys never buy the Pro Max iPhones? I swear it’s only girls with big phones.

0

2 months ago

big, boy, boys, buy, girl, girls, humor, i, iPhone, max, never, only, phone, phones, pro, Pro Max, size, stereotype, swear, technology, why
time heals all wounds.” Wrong! Time is chasing me with a knife.

0

3 days ago

chase, chasing, fear, healing, humor, joke, knife, me, pain, time, wound, wounds, wrong
I ran out of toilet paper so I had to start using old newspapers. The Times are rough.

0

2 months ago

bathroom, humor, i, necessity, newspaper, newspapers, old, paper, pun, ran, resourcefulness, rough, rough times, start, times, toilet, toilet paper
If you pick a movie that’s longer than the flight, the pilot gets a notification to fly around for a bit.

0

2 months ago

around, bit, entertainment, flight, fly, humor, movie, notification, pick, pilot, time, travel

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

72 shares on Instagram this month:

Before I drink, I eat liver so the liquor won’t know which liver to attack.

45 shares on WeChat this month:

The older I get, the more I understand why people live in the woods and talk to squirrels.

31 shares on Snapchat this month:

Apparently I’m the reason why I never have any money. I am shocked!

97 shares on Twitch this month:

You are closer to the street than you will ever be to any billionaire.

31 shares on Telegram this month:

Home is where the Wi-Fi connects automatically and no one chews loud.

83 shares on Facebook this month:

I really thought impromptu dance-offs were going to be more common.

26 shares on WeChat this month:

Every Stranger Things scene is just a guy in a wig being like, ‘We have to stop them.’

69 shares on TikTok this month:

Working as a 911 operator but hanging up when someone starts screaming because I’m an empath, and it overwhelms me.

75 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t drink alcohol. I like suffering raw.

62 shares on Instagram this month:

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Drugs don’t ruin lives. Drug tests do.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Іf Empire Strikes Back isn’t a Christmas movie, then why is there so much snow in it?

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

I’m busy watching the vegan couple next door arguing about the Big Mac wrapper I hid in their trash can.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

I missed out on drowning tragically young in a suburban swimming pool.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

If you start a sentence with “Let me reiterate…”, I’m gonna ignore it the second time too.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Men absolutely love buying the same shirt in four almost identical colors and saying, ‘Yep, that’ll do me for the next three years.’

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

I can’t wait to hit my 80s & run for Congress.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

Why does everyone always think that I know what I’m doing? Most of the time I watch myself in amazement and am curious to see what happens.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Passive income? Brothers, I need massive income.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

Twitter hits different, cause it’s like the only social media app you can use effectively while playing music.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I absolutely loooooove getting in the bed. The excitement of finally laying down? Unmatched.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I would do absolutely anything to get 8 hours of sleep, except for going to bed 8 hours before I need to wake up.

Making waves on Threads:

Today in who needs an alarm: my kid woke me up early by scream-whispering WHAT IS DUST?

Making waves on Twitch:

I hate when people are like “you are so nice”. I’m ugly, I have no other choice.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

When I don’t have money, I stop talking to women out of respect.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Emotions? No thanks. I’m trying to cut down.

Making waves on Reddit:

Went to bed with wet hair and woke up looking like I might know a lot about astrophysics.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

A DM? Flirt on the timeline like a real man.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I’m at that point on a Monday where no.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My sneeze is the reason people in the middle ages believed sneezing was caused by demon possession.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Yawning is the body’s way of telling you it has only 15% battery remaining.

My daughter’s new Bluetooth karaoke mic has suddenly and mysteriously disappeared, and we are all just so, so sad that we can’t find it.

Why do boys never buy the Pro Max iPhones? I swear it’s only girls with big phones.

time heals all wounds.” Wrong! Time is chasing me with a knife.

I ran out of toilet paper so I had to start using old newspapers. The Times are rough.

If you pick a movie that’s longer than the flight, the pilot gets a notification to fly around for a bit.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨