Political ads be like: send us money so we can send you more ads.

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At my age, a trail of clothes leading to the bedroom, means I dropped them on the way from the dryer.

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I made coffee and carried it to the couch. I’ve done everything I had planned for this Sunday.

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Not to brag, but my wife just described the dinner I made as “interesting.”

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If you think my posts are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices.

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Ladies, if a man says he will fix something, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.

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How many calories do you burn waiting to hear back?

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The person opposite me has a donut. I do not have a donut. That should be my donut. This person is now my arch nemesis.

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I logged on to Amazon and they said that they have run out of things that I don’t need.

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In England “booster shot” is spelled “borchestershire shot”.

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Our dog snores so loud, we had to rename him Grandpa.