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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • There’s going to be a full moon this Christmas! Because mixing family and alcohol together wasn’t enough…
  • People say “go big or go home” like going home is a bad thing. Heck yeah, I want to go home, and I’ll have a nap when I get there.
  • One day there will be condoms with Bluetooth that tell you whether you’re good in bed, how many calories you’ve burned and when the next train leaves.
  • I’m really looking forward to eight hours of thinking about sleep tonight.
  • So proud of my ancestors for crawling out of the sea and evolving lungs. Pretty disappointed in them ever since though.
  • I know there are bigger problems in the world right now, but I’ve just realized I’ve never seen a baby seagull.