Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

One of the biggest struggles of being an adult is deciding what to make for supper. Every. Single. Night.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

I don’t understand how people use plastic wrap successfully.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in such a way that they look forward to the journey.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

Another Monday that no one asked for.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Getting tired without doing anything is an art form.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

God, on inventing the tiger: “Okay, so this is going to be some kind of cat that likes to eat Frosted Flakes.”

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

The introverted urge to spend a week alone at home after many holidays and family gatherings.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Dropped my skinny boyfriend between the bed and the wall like a vape or a TV remote.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

A good French onion soup will have you acting like a pervert.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

220 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,489

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,489

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,635

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Twitch:

The endings of Lost and Game of Thrones each cost me a television.

Going viral on Twitch:

Everyone hates math until their paycheck looks funny, then all of a sudden you know trigonometry.

Spotted on Slack:

Sure sex is cool, but have you ever farted away a stomachache?

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Climbing Mount Everest looks super boring and dumb. You just walk uphill, are cold and at the brink of death. No thanks.

Making waves on Threads:

You can tell they named the aardvark early in the week and the anteater on a Friday.

Breaking via Threads:

Last year I had no valentine, this year I also have no valentine. Consistency!

Going bananas on Telegram:

I’m starting to understand the distant uncle.

Breaking via Snapchat:

If you smoke pot in Saudi Arabia, you risk getting stoned.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I hate it when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.

Trending via Messenger:

I think it’s very sexy of me to still move with love in a world like this.

Ripping the fishnets off my slutty little oranges.

6 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When life gives you oranges, make sure they're ready for the party 🎉🍊👠

cheeky, fishnet, humor, little, orange, oranges, playful, ripping, slutty

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Moose would have been a better name for a cow.

0

2 months ago

animal, better, cow, humor, moose, name
I’ve just turned off the news and put on a serial killer documentary to relax.

0

2 months ago

chilling, documentary, entertainment, humor, irony, just, killer, news, put, relax, relief, serial, serial killer, stress, stress relief, turned
I’ve discovered I have a logic fetish, I just can’t stop coming to conclusions.

0

2 months ago

coming, conclusion, conclusions, fetish, humor, i, just, logic, pun, stop, wordplay
I was about to stop overthinking, then I thought of a giraffe having a sore throat.

0

3 months ago

animal, funny thought, giraffe, having, humor, i, imagination, overthinking, sore, sore throat, stop, thought, throat
Getting a lawn sign so people know what I think today.

0

2 months ago

communication, day, expression, getting, humor, i, know, lawn, lawn sign, opinion, people, sign, think, today
I was guest-starring on The Love Boat when you woke me up. You’re dead to me.

0

2 months ago

boat, comedy, dead, dead to me, guest, guest star, humor, i, irritation, love, me, relationships, sarcasm, show, star, The Love Boat, TV, TV Show, wake, wake up, woke

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

56 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The rainforest cafe won’t be authentic enough for me if they don’t bulldoze 40% of the restaurant while I’m there.

96 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.

92 shares on Discord this month:

That bourbon chicken from the mall only tastes good on that toothpick. You order it, and it’s not the same, I swear.

55 shares on Snapchat this month:

“Twister 3” should be told from a cow’s POV.

35 shares on X this month:

Lord, remove any laziness from my body and push me to my full potential the rest of this year.

77 shares on X this month:

If she says “you are my world” remember there are other planets. Stay alert, kings!

75 shares on Instagram this month:

Went for a run this morning. That bee was huge!

80 shares on Facebook this month:

I mostly choose to stay silent in weird situations but my face has subtitles.

33 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My kids asked me what games I used to play on my iPad as a kid. I told them I used to speak into a fan to sound like a robot.

67 shares on Twitch this month:

Not right now. I’m manifesting.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

Asked a German woman why Germany produced so many legendary physicists / mathematicians, and her response was basically, “Have you considered educating people who aren’t rich?”

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

January 1st always feels like a Sunday, regardless of what day it’s actually on.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

If my dog knew how many photos I have of him sleeping, he’d file a restraining order against me.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

I become the most financially irresponsible person in the world the second I step into a Japanese stationary store.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

My boyfriend just said “I encourage you to try all things” to our cat who was licking up Buffalo sauce.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Men don’t eject their eyes from their sockets and yell awooga anymore.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Meow means woof in cat.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Born to be a hater but forced to understand where you’re coming from.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Tonight, the moon is staring at me.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WeChat:

How do I tell Instagram I don’t want to see guys almost eaten by gators?

Just shared via Telegram:

As a Dad, you always want your kids to be prepared for real life, that’s why trolling them is so vital.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Shazam, but for the name of the person who literally just introduced themself to me.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I hate when someone you love says mean things like, “It’s time to wake up.”

Making waves on Messenger:

50 shades of single.

Live now on Facebook:

Rare earth, this rare earth, that. There’s nothing more rare on this earth than affordable housing in a walkable neighborhood.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Don’t even bother contacting me on the Ouija Board after I die. I barely answer my texts now.

Making waves on Pinterest:

You know you’re the father of teen boys when a shoe print on the ceiling no longer fazes you.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

This too shall pass… It may pass like a kidney stone, but it will pass.

Just shared via X:

Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they are dead.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Ripping the fishnets off my slutty little oranges.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Moose would have been a better name for a cow.

I’ve just turned off the news and put on a serial killer documentary to relax.

I’ve discovered I have a logic fetish, I just can’t stop coming to conclusions.

I was about to stop overthinking, then I thought of a giraffe having a sore throat.

Getting a lawn sign so people know what I think today.

I was guest-starring on The Love Boat when you woke me up. You’re dead to me.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨