Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the beauty of sleeping – the closest you can get to being dead without the commitment! 💤😂 It's like hitting the pause button on life, but without the consequences. Win-win indeed! 😴👍"

awake, dead, humor, nice, situation, sleep, sleeping, win-win

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The goal is to make your therapist cry.

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4 months ago

cry, emotional, goal, humor, therapist
If we were both crows, I’d bring you shiny things.

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2 months ago

affection, both, bring, crows, gift, humor, ID, love, relationship, shiny, shiny thing, thing, things
The best essential oils are the ones that drip out of Tacos.

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2 months ago

best, cooking, essential, essential oil, food, food humor, humor, oil, taco
Іf Empire Strikes Back isn’t a Christmas movie, then why is there so much snow in it?

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2 months ago

back, Christmas, Christmas movie, culture, debate, empire, Empire Strikes Back, film, holiday, humor, movie, movie debate, much, pop, pop culture, snow, star, Star Wars, strikes, wars, why, winter
Cheers erupt as woman cuts into perfectly ripe avocado.

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2 months ago

avocado, celebration, cheers, food, humor, kitchen, perfectly, ripe, woman
Sometimes I wish I could turn down the volume on certain people.

0

2 months ago

annoyance, certain, certain person, communication, humor, i, people, person, sometimes, turn, volume, wish

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

72 shares on Discord this month:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

18 shares on Threads this month:

80% of arguments start because someone hasn’t eaten yet.

43 shares on WeChat this month:

Headless mannequins are great because they let you see how you’ll look wearing a new shirt after you’ve been decapitated.

67 shares on TikTok this month:

The word “misread” can be misread as “misread.”

46 shares on Slack this month:

No matter how old you are, when the kitchen roll is empty, you have a telescope.

61 shares on Threads this month:

Animals are 15 minutes old and already know what to do.

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t need a New Year’s resolution, it’s the year’s turn to be better.

87 shares on Pinterest this month:

Girl math is ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife.

22 shares on Messenger this month:

Put my too-weak notice in at the gym.

86 shares on Telegram this month:

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you a car.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

That feeling when it’s Friday, you blink once, and somehow it’s Monday again.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

All we needed to be happy in the 90s was music and cigarettes.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

Did you get that psychic damage I sent you?

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

Now that I have a standing desk, I’m adding manual labor to my resume.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

Have y’all tried calories? They’re so good.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Cleaned the bathroom window. Wasn’t frosted glass at all.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

The week before your period doesn’t make any sense… until you realize it’s the week before your period.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Have nothing to say, I just wanted to appear in your newsfeed.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

I’m a big believer in not going to work on your birthday!

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

I think I’ll spend my savings on a lifetime supply of pasta. Worth every penne.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

Date night idea: fight another couple.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

My life advice is always the same. Wait for karma, but take up kickboxing, just in case.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I wish I was born into wealth so I could have a nice 1-bedroom apartment.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I’m eating sandwiches you haven’t heard of in jeans you can’t pronounce.

Just shared via Snapchat:

There’s a special place in hell for people like you (next to me).

Seen just now on Instagram:

Told my boss I was going to the bathroom but didn’t say which one. Now I’m at home.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

The female ability to be able to guess exactly which girl it is out of his 740 following.

Going viral on X:

Nothing angers me more than tall ghosts in horror movies. No one born in 1782 was that tall. Do your research, screenwriters.

Spotted on Messenger:

Have a good weekend, unless you have other plans.

Live now on Instagram:

This meeting could have been a cake.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Sleeping is nice, because you’re not actually dead and you’re not awake, so its a win-win situation.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The goal is to make your therapist cry.

If we were both crows, I’d bring you shiny things.

The best essential oils are the ones that drip out of Tacos.

Іf Empire Strikes Back isn’t a Christmas movie, then why is there so much snow in it?

Cheers erupt as woman cuts into perfectly ripe avocado.

Sometimes I wish I could turn down the volume on certain people.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨