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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Food gives you energy to nap more.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Sure sex is cool, but have you ever farted away a stomachache?

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

That’s kind of sexy of you to be a little weird.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

I’m starting to think the real hell is just being stuck in an infinite loop of self-doubt and bad life choices.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

I can’t keep up anymore. Happy birthday to everyone for the rest of your life.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Happy birthday to everyone, for the rest of your lives. I can’t do this anymore.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

I’m starting to think that the secret to having a happy life is avoiding people.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

Yeah, sex is cool, but have you ever taken an afternoon nap on the couch?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

There I was, quietly reliving my dream of having my own house, when suddenly I was attacked by insane prices.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

Be careful when you follow the masses sometimes the M is silent.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,459

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

My ideal man is a kindhearted little freak.

Making waves on WeChat:

I love when really expensive products say, “apply generously,” like, of course, you would say that.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Back in my day, we had to walk to the TV to change the channel. Uphill, both ways!

Freshly posted on YouTube:

No revenge, because I don’t even remember what happened.

Trending via Telegram:

When I die, I want to come back as a speed bump so I can piss people off.

Making waves on Facebook:

World domination? I don’t even want to be responsible for myself.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I think one quality that makes me incredibly attractive is that I keep my mouth shut when I have nothing to say.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Forget being the bigger person, I’m going to just start barking at people.

Spotted on YouTube:

Study so hard until Dior is like Shein to you.

Making waves on Slack:

Trying to watch a superhero movie without stressing about the infrastructure damage to the city.

So many true crime podcasts are just like “a young woman went missing, the police took a week to respond, she was last seen with a man the community call Creepy Steve, he has never been questioned”

1 month ago

Witty text highlighting the frustrating clichés of true crime podcasts with a humorous tone.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🕵️‍♂️🔍 Ah, the classic "Creepy Steve" scenario in every true crime podcast! It's like a game of Clue where the suspect's name is practically screaming "Guilty!" from the get-go. But hey, at least we can always rely on the community to have a unanimously agreed-upon nickname for the potential suspect, right? "Creepy Steve" strikes again! 🔎🚨

call, community, creepy, Creepy Steve, crime, humor, just, last, man, missing, never, podcast, police, response, seen, steve, true, true crime, week, woman, young

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on Instagram this month:

I just bought a universal remote. This changes everything.

52 shares on Messenger this month:

I finally got 8 hours of sleep. Took me four days, but whatever.

59 shares on YouTube this month:

Happy new fear!

27 shares on Pinterest this month:

A song that hits so hard it makes you want a cigarette.

87 shares on YouTube this month:

“Grey” is a better spelling than “gray” because “e” is a greyer letter than “a.” I will not elaborate.

18 shares on Threads this month:

In my 20s: I’m gonna live forever! In my 40s: uh oh!

85 shares on Reddit this month:

The horror: “Come on, I’ll introduce you to everyone.”

90 shares on WeChat this month:

The night terrors don’t scare me half as much as the day terrors.

27 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Just worked out for 2 hours straight and 1 hour gay.

73 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I can clean the whole house if I want to, but if someone asks me to do it, suddenly I’m lazy.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Stop giving kids Bible names but no Bible lessons. Moses tried to rob me last night.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve discovered that my visiting family members leave crumbs in the butter. Please keep me in your thoughts during this difficult time.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Dating now is basically choosing which red flag you’re willing to tolerate.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

A single garbageman contributes more to society before lunch than every crypto trader and op-ed writer combined does in their lifetime.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Concert tickets should be 75% off if the artist is really super special to you.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

You ever been in the middle of a conversation and realized this is why you avoid people?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

If we’re walking together, just know I’ll definitely bump into you because I can’t walk in a straight line.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Sure sex is cool, but have you ever farted away a stomachache?

11 folks are currently checking 👀

This summer I’m going cicada mode: emerging briefly from my house and being really loud until I find a mate.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,710

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Imagine you go bowling by yourself and you go sit down, but it’s your turn again.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

I need to stop drinking so much. Did I say drinking? I meant thinking. I definitely need to drink more.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

God, on inventing the tiger: “Okay, so this is going to be some kind of cat that likes to eat Frosted Flakes.”

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

The people who are $30 trillion in debt are giving you a credit score.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

I hate managing money, I was born to splurge.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

I don’t weigh myself because most scales don’t know how heavy all the grudges I’m holding onto are.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

My daily routine. Morning: Feeling tired, cranky and lazy. Afternoon: I could go for a nap. Night: I can’t sleep.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

I wish I could join, but I’m busy plotting revenge because my kids laughed when I showed them I can shake it better than Shakira.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Whoever named rice cakes is probably also responsible for Paris, Texas.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Not going is the new leaving early.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Appliances always know when you’re getting a tax refund.

Just landed via WeChat:

The only reason I’d want to go to heaven is to complain to the manager.

Spotted on Reddit:

Just looked around and realized it’s everyone’s first time living.

Just landed via Snapchat:

The magician told me to “Pick a card! Any card!” So I took his Visa.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

When you wish you could tell someone that won’t stop talking “Okay, we’re out of time today”, just like a therapist.

Going viral on Messenger:

Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

Spotted on Facebook:

The longest and most adventurous journeys begin with the words: “I know a shortcut.”

Trending via Messenger:

I usually don’t flirt, so if I flirt with you, please cooperate.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Marriage is like a phone call at the night: First there’s the ring, and then you wake up.

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