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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

You know you’re an introvert when you want to go home before even leaving the house.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

I think I look pretty okay for my age. It’s just when I hold menus two feet from my face that I know the ruse is up.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

If you are influenced by influencers, you’re beyond retarded.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

The true horror genre: my old Facebook statuses.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

She is so narcissistic that her narcissism has narcissism.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

Life is short, flirt with me!

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

When someone asks me why I’m in a wheelchair, I want to say something ridiculous like, “I’m not standing up until I’ve saved a million.”

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Sometimes the best thing about my job is that my chair turns.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

Shout out to the people getting $400 hotel rooms on Feb 14th to do the same two positions they do at home.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

“Autophagy” would be a beautiful name for a girl.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,708

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.

Seen just now on Threads:

Before sleeping, most people will imagine stuff they want to happen. Like sleeping.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Yes, officer I saw the speed limit, I just didn’t see your car.

Broadcasted on X:

Starting is the hardest part. Unless it’s eating chocolate. Then stopping is the hardest part.

Making waves on TikTok:

It sure is strange that after Tuesday the rest of the week spells WTF.

Broadcasted on Slack:

In the 90s, you could tell who won the rap battle by who was still alive.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

Trending via Messenger:

Why do my kids have Veteran’s Day off, they haven’t done shit.

Broadcasted on X:

I’m tired of things costing money.

Going bananas on X:

The most surprising part of adulthood is parenting your parents.

Some days you’re the bat, some days you’re the ball.

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Some days you’re the bat, some days you’re the ball.
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Commentary:
"Life is just one big game of baseball – some days you're hitting home runs 🦇 and other days you're getting fouled out ⚾️. Just remember, even if you're feeling like the ball today, tomorrow you might just become the bat again! 🌟"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on Pinterest this month:

I know my limits. I don’t always obey them, but I know them.

83 shares on TikTok this month:

Getting ghosted by someone who bothered you in the first place is crazy.

74 shares on Twitch this month:

Establish dominance at work by telling your coworkers they look tired before they get a chance to say it to you.

31 shares on Snapchat this month:

The golden rule of three beverages: one to hydrate, one to caffeinate, and one to celebrate.

68 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute.

58 shares on TikTok this month:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

27 shares on Twitch this month:

How do I become a billionaire by 9 a.m. Monday? Please, it’s urgent.

16 shares on Messenger this month:

Used shampoo containing caffeine. My hair is already on its way to work.

12 shares on Facebook this month:

Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.

72 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m quitting my job to do topless tarot readings on the beach.

Trending Topics 📁

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Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m always happy when I come home from shopping and the note on the table reminds me of what I wanted to buy.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Men can stay up til 2 a.m., wake up at 6, be in debt, broke, alone, and still have faith that one day, everything will work out. It’s called being a man.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I want to be a house cat and simply slap the shit out of anything in front of me that I do not understand.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t think my brain is braining properly today.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I assume fish have beautiful names for eachother, unpronounceable by human tongues.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

“Pre” means before, and “post” means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry!

7 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re a cougar!” God forbid a woman gives back to the youth.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes, after I’ve completed a task that wasn’t on my to-do list, I’ll add it and then cross it off for the free dopamine boost.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,718

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Menstruation is bizarre. It’s like something David Lynch would have came up with.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Welcome to adulthood. Everyone’s tired here.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

There’s no reason my stomach should be growling, I just gave it some iced coffee.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you’re up to.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

God forbid a girl wanna kiss and be kissed.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Laptops become possessed with slowness when they see that you are in a hurry.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Putting mental health before my education is a good idea until it affects my education, which affects my mental health, which affects my education.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

My mom didn’t raise a fool. Possibly a psycho, but never a fool.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

My mind is like my web browser. 19 tabs are open, 3 are frozen and I have no idea where the music is coming from.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

How can people lift weights? My arms get tired just by putting my hair up in a ponytail.

Trending via Discord:

My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!

Just landed via X:

Welcome to your 50s. You used to be a lot taller.

Making waves on Twitch:

We are talking about how beautiful and cool you are behind your back.

Broadcasted on X:

I hope your spoon slides into your soup.

Just shared via WeChat:

My bit for Thanksgiving is going to be constantly bringing up politics, but pronouncing every politician’s name slightly incorrectly.

Trending via WeChat:

Roses are pink. I need a drink.

Making waves on YouTube:

“You’re an athlete,” I whisper to myself, as I begin my third attempt to get out of the couch.

Live now on Telegram:

My Saturday was going pretty well until I realized it was Sunday.

Seen just now on Discord:

I’d be a horrible stalker… I’m always late.

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