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Commentary:
"Talk about bleeding red, white, and blue! 💙🩸❤️ Hope your period doesn't sway your vote… or vice versa! Stay strong, period warrior! 💪🇺🇸 #PatrioticFlow"

bleed, country, day, election, humor, irony, patriot, period, true

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m so tired. Let’s see all of the horrible things happening in the world today before I try to sleep peacefully.

0

2 months ago

before, happening, horrible, horrible things, humor, i, irony, peaceful, sarcasm, sleep, things, tired, today, try, world
There are real people living amongst us who pay for Discord Nitro.

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2 months ago

discord, Discord Nitro, gaming, humor, living, nitro, online, online service, pay, paying, people, real, service, subscription, us
It’s like 10,000 yawns when all you need is a nap.

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2 months ago

exhaustion, fatigue, humor, nap, need, rest, sleep, yawn
Selfish people are my favorite because you never have to guess their motives.

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2 months ago

favorite, guess, honesty, humor, motive, never, people, person, personality, personality trait, selfish, selfish person, trait
Brainwashing is always considered terrible and horrible. But there are many brains that would benefit from a wash.

0

2 months ago

always, benefit, brain, brains, brainwashing, horrible, terrible, wash
For all those wondering, yes, I am retired. I was tired yesterday, and I am tired again today.

0

3 weeks ago

again, am, exhaustion, humor, i, retired, retirement, tired, today, wondering, yes, yesterday

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on Messenger this month:

The Sims fulfills the millennial fantasy of being able to afford a house in a walkable neighborhood on the salary of a professional carrot peeler.

99 shares on Discord this month:

Having a pool is so neat. All of your friends are suddenly interested to catch up on the hottest days of the year.

95 shares on Facebook this month:

Let’s hope those bridges you burn keep you warm at night.

51 shares on Instagram this month:

My style isn’t even my real style yet. Just wait till my budget matches my vision.

66 shares on Threads this month:

Objection your honor, if the prosecutor doesn’t have anything nice to say then he shouldn’t say anything at all.

74 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m glad nobody can see the face I make when I’ve just started the washing machine and then spot a sock on the floor.

65 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

92 shares on X this month:

My favorite part of parenting is when they’re asleep.

58 shares on Twitch this month:

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

56 shares on TikTok this month:

I say “long story short” and then tell the story with bonus features.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

I’m not saying Lois Lane is a bad investigative journalist, but my friend Greg didn’t wear glasses to work yesterday and I recognized him by lunch time.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Mentally, I’m in a forest screaming. Physically, I’m answering emails with a fake smile and clenched jaw.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Diet hack: Spend your money filling up your gas tank so you won’t have money for groceries.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

Coffee doesn’t solve all my problems. But it definitely stops me from constantly creating new ones.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Flirting is easy until you have to flirt with the person you like.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

I have no need to judge people because of their religion, skin color or sexual orientation. Bad behavior is enough for me.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

Be the lemon you want the world to hand to others.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

Hello! I’m Britain’s greatest spy and my catchphrase is: I tell you my real surname, then my real forename, then my real surname again, in case you missed it.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

I’m delusional but self-aware, I call that Delaware.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

Thank God for headphones and day dreaming.

Going bananas on Slack:

Don’t tell me to trust my gut. Thats where I put my snacks. Clearly that’s where I’m the weakest.

Going viral on Twitch:

Listen, before I had my coffee I didn’t know how awesome I was going to be today either.

Breaking via Messenger:

Having a bathroom switch outside a bathroom and a sibling is a bad combination.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Sleep with each other, or someone else will!

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Getting married soon. Just need a spouse.

Just landed via TikTok:

If I ever find out who stole my identity, I’ll pay all their debts and ruin their credit score just for fun.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Jacket I left on a chair that sometimes looks like a person at night stuns in new evening nightmare.

Just shared via Reddit:

At least life has music.

Spreading quickly via X:

Plants are like “I’ll have a light lunch.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Starting my period on election day because I’m a true patriot who bleeds for this country.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I’m so tired. Let’s see all of the horrible things happening in the world today before I try to sleep peacefully.

There are real people living amongst us who pay for Discord Nitro.

It’s like 10,000 yawns when all you need is a nap.

Selfish people are my favorite because you never have to guess their motives.

Brainwashing is always considered terrible and horrible. But there are many brains that would benefit from a wash.

For all those wondering, yes, I am retired. I was tired yesterday, and I am tired again today.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨