“Still gangsta” I whisper to myself as I drink my chamomile tea with a heating pad on my back.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Whoever was the first to shorten “Richard” down to “Dick” must have really hated that guy.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Hey boy, are you my washing machine? Because neither of you know how long 10 minutes last.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Tupperware is a fun way to store your leftovers until you throw them away.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

How silly of me to forget that I am the love of my life.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Please no more relationships that are supposed to be a lesson. I’m already quite the scholar.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Sometimes I’ll call in, disguise my voice, and insist on speaking to me, or I’ll take my business elsewhere.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

The earlier you wake up, the more time you have to think about why you wish you were still asleep in bed.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

I was in Paris with a boyfriend once and he lit a candle in Notre Dame in order to ask God to raise the price of Bitcoin.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

Waiting for toast to toast takes forever unless you walk away for 10 seconds, then it burns.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

I had a dream about you. You were stupid there, too.