Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

I keep forgetting i’m at the age where people will tell me they’re pregnant and my reaction is supposed to be positive.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

I love sleeping so much that it is the first thing I think about when I wake up.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

In medieval Europe, it was pretty easy to amass vast armies eager to go into battle and have their heads chopped off because no one wanted to be alive in medieval Europe.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

My husband and I were doing yard work, but I started a fight so I could storm off into the air conditioning.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Probably the most humiliating thing that can happen when you die is that you come back as a fitted-sheet ghost.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Our pronunciation of the word “colonel” does feel like group psychosis.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

The real flex is becoming the woman he cannot run back to.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

I would cry but my makeup is too expensive.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

I don’t know what millennial needs to hear this, but throw away the box your phone came in. You don’t need it. You will never need it.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,273

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I like to take long walks away from stupid people.

Just landed via Reddit:

You didn’t let me know you got home safely so you better at least be injured or I’m gonna be pissed.

Breaking via Twitch:

I don’t know why hair extensions are exclusive to women, I want to look like a centaur.

Spotted on X:

“Thug life,” I whisper to myself as I check out my sunglasses in the mirror.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Going to the beach is 99% getting ready for the beach and 1% enjoying the beach.

Just landed via Twitch:

I woke up deciding to incorporate the parkour lifestyle into my daily life then reconsidered as I fell over again putting my jeans on.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

With me, it isn’t Netflix & chill. It’s Prime & panic.

Going viral on Slack:

Nobody warns you of the devastation two days of stuffing will bring upon your digestive system.

Trending via X:

I’ll never tell anyone your secret because that would mean talking to people.

Shared recently on Instagram:

My kids couldn’t care less about personal hygiene unless we are running late somewhere.

Sure, my internet service is overpriced and spotty but you can’t put a price on unintentionally being dropped from every Zoom meeting.

2 weeks ago

Funny quote highlighting unreliable internet and accidental Zoom dropouts with a playful vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs reliable internet anyway when you have the thrill of being mysteriously kicked out of every Zoom gathering? 🤷‍♂️ Embrace the unexpected hiatus and let your unreliable connection become the real MVP of your work-from-home experience! 💻🚫 #UnintentionalDrama"

being, connectivity, dropped, every, frustration, humor, internet, meeting, overpriced, price, put, service, sure, technology, Zoom

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

10 shares on Messenger this month:

Sorry, I can’t hang out tomorrow. I hung out with people a week ago and I’m still recovering from that.

86 shares on Facebook this month:

This can’t be the same brain I was using to read 750-page novels in 3 days during middle school.

38 shares on YouTube this month:

My fight or flight response has frequent flyer miles.

25 shares on Threads this month:

Dying and being reincarnated as a beetle, and crawling to my old body’s grave, and digging down and living in my old ribcage.

61 shares on Twitch this month:

If I were a bird, I know who I’d poop on.

57 shares on Twitch this month:

Spending money on disappointing food is a different type of pain.

91 shares on Messenger this month:

October is the situationship of months. So briefly beautiful, but you know the horrors are imminent.

11 shares on Twitch this month:

Can’t believe my neighbor rang my doorbell at 3 a.m. last night… Luckily, I was still up playing the drums.

55 shares on WeChat this month:

Gonna toot my own horn here because I made it through another day without turning any of my feelings into felonies.

94 shares on Threads this month:

Why is adulthood just bills and wondering what to eat?

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m an atheist, so if you send prayers, I’ll send thoughts.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

My love language is caffeine and being left alone until I’m kind again.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

How dare my boss set up a meeting for the time I sneak off early?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I get it, sauce, I also thicken over time.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Drinking through a straw is the opposite of snorkeling.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

You see how in cartoons, when they’re hungry, their friends start looking like a chicken leg? That’s how ovulation feels.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Eight times a day, I ask myself which object in the office will hurt me enough so that I can go home, but at the same time won’t hurt too much.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

“This too shall pass!” Okay, but like, when exactly?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Every time I spend my own money, I feel like somebody needs to reimburse me.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish you could put your whole life on do not disturb.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,357

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

A Twitter swear jar could end world hunger.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

I get all the cardio I need by running out of patience.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Still can’t believe America has a federal holiday to celebrate the hit movie Independence Day.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

For Halloween I will go to the beach dressed as a french fry and let the seagulls destroy me.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

Might start a YouTube channel “will it hurt if I drop it on my foot”.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

“Lmao” has survived and even thrived over the years, but its cousin “rofl” has faded into indignity. The cruelty of fate.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

At my age, you check a friend’s Facebook page to make sure they’re still alive before wishing them a happy birthday.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

May the Force be with you… especially in Monday meetings.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

We can’t use nicknames at work anymore, and I blame Teletubby.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Telegram:

I spend half the day wondering if it’s too late for coffee and the other half wondering if it’s too early for alcohol.

Trending via YouTube:

I don’t want to do exercise, but I want to have done exercise.

Seen just now on Instagram:

(Seeing the guy next to me reading a novel) You know, none of that happened, right?

Freshly posted on Threads:

Grocery shopping before Christmas is a nightmare. My milk expired while I was waiting in line.

Shared recently on WeChat:

When I was a kid, I never expected the future to suck this much.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

My daily exercise routine involves running late, jumping to conclusions and pushing my luck.

Just landed via Slack:

Your Honor, that doesn’t sound like me.

Going viral on Slack:

My problem is I always think I can get ready in 15 minutes when I have repeatedly proven that I can’t.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Ugh, but profoundly.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Eating the sticker on an apple counts as 35% of your daily fiber intake.

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