Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

I love sleeping so much that it is the first thing I think about when I wake up.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

It’s always “your monthly bill is available,” never “this month is on us.”

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought putting your heart and soul into a relationship would make it work.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

I was at a funeral yesterday and spiced things up by walking over to complete strangers and saying “Ignore what everyone else thinks. I, personally, have no issue with you being here”.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

I have feelings for you but you have to guess which ones.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Don’t tell me about your wild weekend. My TV remote died and I switched the batteries around, and now it’s working.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

My favorite emails are the ones that say your order has shipped.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

Just saw someone my age running and she wasn’t chasing an ice-cream truck.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

I just hit the back arrow on a website, and it took me to a page that said, “Before you leave.” No. I already made the decision.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Guys, please stop wearing NASA shirts, I bet you can’t even name one of their songs.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,614

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

Sure, you can invite more people to the plans we made 2 months ago. The more, the merrier. Also, I’m not going now.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Girl, I’m bored. Let’s start drinking the daily recommended 10-15 cups of water.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Sorry I didn’t get you an anniversary card, babe, but you opted in to paperless affection on our third date.

Spotted on Messenger:

Be the elephant you wish to see in the room.

Broadcasted on X:

Do men know they don’t have to keep their clothing until it disintegrates?

Breaking via Discord:

He called me delusional, but I think he meant delicious.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Uninstalling Instagram can increase your IQ by 10%.

Breaking via Twitch:

I don’t simply want to kill a mosquito; I want to bite them back over and over to make them itch.

Trending via WeChat:

Unless I say otherwise, I am always tired.

Just landed via YouTube:

Your soul is out of balance because you have fallen out of touch with your consumer demographic. Pay more attention to your personalized ads, let them flow through you.

Tequila won’t fix your life, but it’s worth a shot.

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Commentary:
Taking life one shot of wisdom at a time! 🍹😄

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

71 shares on LinkedIn this month:

In my years of experience, people who disagree with me are usually wrong.

41 shares on Facebook this month:

Having hoes in different area codes sounds really exhausting.

30 shares on Slack this month:

God saw you do that.

54 shares on Slack this month:

I identify as a weather forecast: Anything’s possible.

24 shares on Discord this month:

Your secret is safe with me and my sister.

55 shares on Pinterest this month:

Mission Impossible theme song plays in my head when I’m trying to remember a password.

12 shares on Discord this month:

Apple want $3,500 for their Vision Pro. No thanks. I can look like a dork for free.

42 shares on Twitch this month:

Trying to bribe Monday with coffee to get it to act like a Friday.

28 shares on Pinterest this month:

How old were you when you found out people in porn aren’t actually in love?

36 shares on Reddit this month:

Candy cigarettes really used to be a thing and we really bought them and walked around like we were smokers at the tender age of 6.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The biggest lesson employment has taught me is that efficient workers get punished with more work.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Just say, “My future husband would never do that,” and move on.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Career? Never heard of her. I’m majoring in sunshine and snacks.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, I would love to, but I just made a bunch of rules for myself, and I’m actually not allowed to do that.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Today, I want to talk about underperforming continents. Antarctica, explain yourself.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent a political party that doesn’t suck.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Every time I wanna quit, I remember horses don’t stop.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Daylight savings is just a made up holiday to sell more daylight.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Name a better duo than sad and depressed.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Pretty annoying when someone unfollows me before I can conduct their exit interview.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,323

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

Imagine being in the Trojan horse with the lads, pure darkness and giggling like hehehe

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

To think that billions in venture capital have been deployed because it was annoying to copy and paste from ChatGPT.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Hi, I’m a social media user, you might know me from such hits as “I’m leaving this stupid place” and “I’m back everybody.”

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

I briefly stepped away from social media to get an idea of what else is going on in the world. For instance, I didn’t realize I was still married.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

A storm knows it’s laced with destruction, and yet it rages on.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Google AI is awesome because it kills the planet and doesn’t work.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Is it just me or does everything cost like we’re shopping in an airport now?

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Can you lose weight by running away from your feelings?

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

You don’t have to remember details when you don’t lie.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

I wish Amazon would stop finding things I might like.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via TikTok:

I finally figured out my lifelong dream of becoming a human blanket, but my friends still call it napping on their couch.

Breaking via X:

Remember when a series of unfortunate events was a book and not your life?

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Some stupid little amoeba decided to leave the ocean a billion years ago and now I have to worry about Monday.

Trending via Discord:

This call, should’ve been a message in a bottle I never found.

Spotted on Reddit:

The dragon with the girl tattoo.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I remember when asking someone if they were on X meant something completely different.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Fyi, if you like listening to “rain sounds,” they’re almost all recordings of chicken being fried.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

The subtle art of surviving this life with grace and dignity.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

My new phone is being delivered by Amazon, which means that I can track its movements for a day before it tracks mine for five years.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

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