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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

I am a full grown adult. Now listen to me discuss the various plot holes in Paw Patrol.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

You can’t fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on Facebook every day.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

German couples probably have less arguments because there’s an exact word for, “I’m fine, just annoyed you forgot the milk again”.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

It’s all fun and games until your jeans don’t fit any more.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

I shall have another coffee, for I am sleeping standing.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

I deserve a dragon after all I’ve been through.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

I love when people say “be yourself,” like I haven’t already been doing that and scaring everyone off.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

When buying presents I like to think, what would Jesus have got you? So yeah, enjoy your fish sandwich.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2381 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,543

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,543

1 hour ago

3,435

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

And then there are those dates after which you think: “Have I really shaved my legs for this?”

Reported on Snapchat:

Why go to the art museum when I can just stare at you?

Breaking via Pinterest:

I wonder if babies know that we are more terrified of them than they are of us.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I don’t have a nervous system, I am a nervous system.

Just shared via Twitch:

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

Going viral on Discord:

Interesting people are my favorite endangered species.

Seen just now on Threads:

You can recognize working-class kids by the fact that they hang their jacket over the chair in the restaurant and not on the coat hook.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

When Chuck Norris was born, the doctor got slapped.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Alcohol: When you want to run away from your problems without moving.

Reported on Slack:

I really think tossing and turning at night should be counted as exercise.

That thing in video games where you have a great item so you hold onto it but never end up using it? Thats me with fruit.

Jan 23, 2025

That thing in video games where you have a great item so you hold onto it but never end up using it? Thats me with fruit.

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Commentary:
Ah, the ultimate struggle of hoarding virtual loot and pristine produce 🍌🍎🕹️ Don't worry, we've all been there… hanging onto that golden apple like it’s the rarest treasure in the land! Just remember, in both gaming and life, sometimes you just have to take a bite and savor the sweetness! 😉🎮🍇

end, fruit, game, games, gaming, gaming humor, great, hoarding, hold, humor, item, me, never, procrastination, relatable, thing, video, video game, where

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2381 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,543

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,543

1 hour ago

3,441

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

And are the people who find you “hilarious” in the room with us now?

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

The females who don’t go through phones will definitely find out through dreams.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

RIP to everyone killed by the Gods for their hubris, but I’m different. And better. Maybe even better than the Gods.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Phone addiction got so bad that watching a movie feels productive.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Not now, I’m befriending a crow and teaching it how to deliver handwritten love notes.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Being an adult is getting excited about buying new appliances.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

There’s only one way we’ll at least occasionally get normal elected officials and that’s if we pick them by random lottery.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

Not all works of art are in a museum. I, for example, am lying on the couch at home.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Experts say that human interaction is important for brain health but I’m willing to risk it.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I let my cat smell every wine I drink so she can get a job as a sommelier and help pay my rent.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

Anybody else not stopped farting this evening? Asking for a friend.

Just landed via Threads:

Hangman is so great. No better way for a child to learn how to spell than by having to save a man from hanging to death.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Two words have helped me open a lot of doors in my life. Push and Pull.

Just shared via Reddit:

Not only do I turn down my radio to find a house or a parking spot, but I also take off my sunglasses to hear someone better.

Just shared via Reddit:

I’ll stop smoking weed when life stops smoking me.

Just landed via TikTok:

Ladies, don’t date hungry guys. They’re just trying to get into your pantries.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Kendrick inspires me to be a bigger, deeper, more passionate hater.

Trending via Twitch:

“She’s so self-centered.” Who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by saying they look tired.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Nobody has ever been given a cheeseburger and been upset about it.

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