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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

Remember when Mustangs were muscle cars and not an embarrassment to the name.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

As parents we have to make sacrifices all the time. Today, I had to eat my kid’s ice cream because she couldn’t finish it.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

They should make a movie that’s good the whole way through.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Bartender asked me to give his place a one-star Google review to keep the vibe lowkey. Insane method.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

The first person to ever throw up was probably like, “Ok, what the hell.”

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

I need a button in Zoom meetings where it just freezes my screen and makes it look like I’m having network issues.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Don’t blame the holidays, you were already overweight in August.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,660

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Before we become friends, could you please sign this NDA.

Just landed via Telegram:

Life is too short. Tell his mom what he did to you.

Just landed via Twitch:

I will marry a man who treats me delicately as if I’m a gift straight from heaven.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Welcome to downtown where the crosswalk signals are merely suggestions and you hope the puddles are water.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Nobody warns you of the devastation two days of stuffing will bring upon your digestive system.

Trending via Telegram:

Clearly I’m not doing Dry January unless you mean sense of humor.

Going viral on Telegram:

Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

5 months ago

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Commentary:
That's why they're always striking up a conversation! 🎳😂💬

actually, after, after work, ball, beef, bowling, bowling ball, friendship, humor, joke, pin, pun, sports, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

A 20% discount sounds great until you realize you can’t afford the other 80%

1 month ago
20, afford, affordability, discount, finance, great, humor, irony, realize, shopping, sounds
A spoonful of peanut butter from the jar will fix me.

1 month ago
butter, comfort, comfort food, fix, food, humor, jar, me, peanut, peanut butter, snack, spoonful
Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

1 month ago
anger, angry, bait, before, frustration, humor, i, me, mood, rage, rage bait, reaction, read, works
What’s a beginner question to ask for someone just getting into being nosy?

1 month ago
ask, beginner, beginner question, being, curiosity, funny question, getting, humor, just, nosy, question, someone
Sorry, can’t. The pears I bought a couple days ago have ripened.

1 month ago
ago, couple, days, excuse, fruit, humor, i, pears, procrastination, ripened, sorry
Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

1 month ago
Adam, babysitter, biblical, eve, even, humor, i, irony, parenting, sometimes, think

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Giant-sized bag of candy: I’m resealable. Me: That won’t be necessary.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

“Time After Time” is my favorite song about doing the dishes.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

My life started becoming a mess when I was put in charge of my own bedtime.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

I am on my second week of biweekly pay so today I will be showing you how to make a quesadilla out of paper towels.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

I deserve a treat when I have a bad week, but I also deserve a treat when I have a good week. I simply always deserve treats.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Life hack: If you never leave the house you don’t have to worry about running into someone you don’t want to talk to.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Took the road less travelled after buying the sat nav less expensive.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

Seen just now on Facebook:

WW3: I can’t fire my weapon unless I first watch a 15-second unskippable ad for Raid Shadow Legends.

Just landed via Reddit:

Satan: “I’d tell you to go to Hell, but I work there and don’t wanna see you everyday.”

Going viral on Facebook:

Did it hurt, when my ice cream outlasted yours?

Live now on Twitch:

Therapy is life letting you speak to the manager.

Just shared via Discord:

The light at the end of the tunnel is only the headlight of the oncoming train.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Cars should have two horns, one for “excuse me, kind friend,” and another for “curse you and your family for generations.”

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Activity Log ✨

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

A 20% discount sounds great until you realize you can’t afford the other 80%

A spoonful of peanut butter from the jar will fix me.

Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

What’s a beginner question to ask for someone just getting into being nosy?

Sorry, can’t. The pears I bought a couple days ago have ripened.

Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

“You’re so understanding,” yeah, because I don’t want to go to prison for the rest of my life.

Do you say “Excuse me” to your pet when you walk by them, or are you rude?

Back in my day there was so much toilet paper and so much eggs that we gathered at night and threw them at the houses of our enemies.

Getting stoned when you have a cat is awesome because it will just walk in and I’m immediately cracking up. Like, look at this dude, I bloody love this guy.

Went fishing and actually caught a fish. So now I gotta deal with this shit.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

So, does anyone know how to end mass religious psychosis, or is it just a thing now until we slowly die off from climate-induced disasters?

“You’re at the age where both 1990 and 2003 are flirting with you.”

If boring was a brand, you’d be the ambassador.

They should invent a day where it all makes sense.

The iPhone alarm is so effective that you wake up before it goes off, so you don’t have to listen to such an unbearable noise.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I would like to see the USA go metric before I die, just so I can enjoy the outrage that would follow.

When they have a dream sequence in a movie, how do they film the person’s dream?

I hate when cashiers feel the need to check if my money is real. If I could make counterfeit money, I wouldn’t be at the Dollar Tree, Karen.

You know it’s a fancy restaurant when you have to point at what you want on the menu because you can’t pronounce the name.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

You’re the human embodiment of an “ugh.”

Need to shave my legs again. Blow-drying takes far too long.

‘Sex with your ex’ is so stupid. If you want to dwell on the past, you can just buy a history book.

My toxic trait is destroying my room every time I get dressed.

So crazy to just be living every day through the slow-motion car crash of escalating fascism, and it’s still like, “Aww, man, I have to go to the dentist.”

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The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

A 20% discount sounds great until you realize you can’t afford the other 80%

A spoonful of peanut butter from the jar will fix me.

Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

What’s a beginner question to ask for someone just getting into being nosy?

Sorry, can’t. The pears I bought a couple days ago have ripened.

Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

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