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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has copied:

Reverse cowgirl because first dates are awkward.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡บ has downloaded:

โ€œIโ€™m not concerned about Netflix buying Warner Brothers. None of this will matter once we evolve gills and start living underwater.โ€

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ผ has copied:

Taking a guy from skinny jeans to linen trousers, thatโ€™s my way of giving back to society.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has bookmarked:

I donโ€™t need coffee, misanthropy fuels me.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has copied:

God: “I told you to love thy neighbor – not start trade wars with them.”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡น has downloaded:

If A-B-C-D didn’t take their sweet time in the alphabet song, LMNOP wouldn’t have to sprint every time.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ธ has copied:

Can the AI bubble just pop already? Everyone hates this crap.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has downloaded:

Iโ€™ll kill the vibe, so you donโ€™t have to.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ญ has downloaded:

I love how spring sprung and then disappeared again.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ป has copied:

I miss when people didnโ€™t talk on speakerphone in public.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,683

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Trending via Instagram:

Please stop fighting with each other on the internet and start fighting with each other in real life. Life is short.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I think something is so beautifully wrong with you.

Making waves on Messenger:

Sorry for acting weird, I am weird, and it will happen again.

Just landed via Messenger:

I’m not fat. I’m just easy to see.

Trending via Facebook:

Apparently, I’m not even going through a lot; I just need money.

Shared recently on Threads:

Who else writes “etc.” knowing damn well you don’t have more examples?

Freshly posted on Threads:

In honor of the winter solstice, I also will be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

Trending via WeChat:

I don’t hate you, I just don’t want to see you alive.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Fruit and vegetables expire faster when you’re the one paying for them.

Shared recently on Discord:

When you have intense chemistry with someone, everyone else feels so bleh.

The day after Christmas is a dangerous morning to be a microwave.

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Commentary:
Sounds like the microwaves have declared December 26th a national day of panic! ๐ŸŒช๏ธ๐ŸŽ„๐Ÿ“ฆ

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Keep the laugh going ๐Ÿ˜‚

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Social Media Stars โญ

22 shares on Snapchat this month:

Moose would have been a better name for a cow.

32 shares on X this month:

Getting married soon. Just need a spouse.

40 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

66 shares on Threads this month:

I think I could actually generate electricity with how irritated I get sometimes.

99 shares on Telegram this month:

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

63 shares on Twitch this month:

Kanye is pretty mean for someone with ‘yay’ in their name.

18 shares on Snapchat this month:

Had to sit with a straight face while my landlord told me I was paying his rent and mortgage for him.

53 shares on X this month:

If you’re a man and don’t feel well or are going through something tough, just remember no one cares.

85 shares on Messenger this month:

If women came with instructions, men wouldn’t read them anyway.

25 shares on Snapchat this month:

How to have flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

24 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

You can learn a lot about a person by observing their every waking movement from a tree outside their house.

8 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I just cleaned the house top to bottom, so now I’m gonna need everybody to stop living here.

14 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Dear brain, please finally learn the difference between hunger and boredom. I’m getting fat.

20 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I can’t be the only person who thinks the presidential debate should be performed as a rap battle.

22 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

When I get married, I want my wedding video to be filmed like it’s an episode of The Office. I want camera zooms, eye contact, side commentaryโ€” all of it.

8 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Studies show young people are having less sex than previous generations. I knew I was ahead of my time.

17 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Let’s be honest. The best moment of the day is when we take off our bra.

25 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Booked an escape room but just to get away from everyone. No plans of escaping.

21 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Dads will insist the Masters is exciting while also napping through it.

25 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Type of hangover that makes you understand why normies spend $25 for a poor soul to bike a bagel to them.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,497

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡บ has viewed:

Being completely ignored on Twitter is associated with higher IQ.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ช has downloaded:

Rich people go to parties. Itโ€™s what they do, and somehow we must all watch videos of it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ท has viewed:

Having a sore throat as a giraffe must really suck.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has shared:

I canโ€™t really explain it but cereal at night tastes better than cereal in the morning.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ซ has viewed:

My mood is currently on “shuffle”.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has shared:

Iโ€™m delusional but self-aware, I call that Delaware.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ด๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

The female brain works like the internet. You can delete something, but it’s never really gone.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡พ๐Ÿ‡ช has shared:

I don’t carry my wallet to work because I’m afraid someone will steal it while I’m sleeping.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has bookmarked:

I wish I loved exercising as much as I love not exercising.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

I get tired from just thinking of everything I have to do.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I miss when there were so many episodes of every show that they all eventually did one where it was hot, and the air conditioning went out.

Spotted on WeChat:

My favorite emails are the ones that say your order has shipped.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I am sick and tired of going to the bathroom. It’s been forty years. It should all be out by now.

Making waves on Twitch:

Those 8 hours at work go by quickly when you call off.

Going viral on Instagram:

My dad must pay my monthly cell phone bill as atonement for his original sin of creating my consciousness.

Shared recently on Reddit:

After weeks of using an anti aging cream, I can now proudly say: I now have very well-maintained wrinkles.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Discord is only good for calling friends on the computer. Please do not waste your time getting caught up in random servers.

Making waves on Discord:

1994: I canโ€™t wait to see what the world is like in 30 years. 2024: God no.

Trending via Snapchat:

Handshakes should be banned. Touch our naked body parts together for all the world to see? Gross!

Shared recently on WeChat:

That moment when you have to restart a song because the conversations in your head got too loud and you missed half the song.

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