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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

It’s like ten thousand views when all you need is a like.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Too many types of pasta. I can say my fav is Fliccaroni and not one of you can be sure if it’s real. Look at you googling it.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

I hate when people ask me what I’m doing tomorrow, I don’t even know what I’m doing today.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

My only addiction is coffee, which is just like crack but is legal and tastes good.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

My idea of fun is watching something on the TV while I look at relevant Wikipedia articles on my phone.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s Wednesday.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

You can just comment, “You two look nice,” on a photo of three people. It’s free and legal.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They’re so rude.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

32 minutes ago

3,447

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure!

Just shared via Slack:

Really looking forward to the day my teenager starts speaking English again.

Trending via Slack:

The only men you can trust is ramen.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Just because I’m friendly doesn’t mean I like you. It just means that I’m not rude.

Going viral on Telegram:

My insurance company said if my tent is stolen while I’m camping, I won’t be covered.

Reported on Slack:

If at first you don’t succeed then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I’m thinking of maybe killing off a few characters in the book I’m writing. That will really spice up my autobiography.

Spotted on Messenger:

How to have flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Dua Lipa is a fantastic singer AND Mario’s advice to Luigi when he wants to get on a slightly higher platform.

Reported on Twitch:

I want a pet eagle that’s trained to steal people’s sandwiches for me.

Trying to win an argument online is sociopathic. I would concede anything to get a stranger to leave me alone.

Jan 24, 2025

Trying to win an argument online is sociopathic. I would concede anything to get a stranger to leave me alone.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Arguing online is like playing chess with a pigeon – no matter how well you play, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces and strut around like it won anyway. 🐦💻 Better to wave the white flag and call it a day before the pigeons take over the internet!"

alone, anything, argument, concede, i, leave, leave alone, me, online, sociopathic, stranger, trying, win

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

32 minutes ago

3,435

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

My wife screamed “you haven’t listened to a single word I’ve said, have you?!” I was taken aback, what a weird way to start a conversation.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

“New recipe” is code for “less content, but worse ingredients”.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

My personal brand is being the guest at a wedding who can’t dance but puts in a noticeable effort.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

I cannot hear a word you are saying if your hoodie strings are uneven.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Liquor store clerk: “Do you need help?” Me: “Yes, but I decided to come here instead.”

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

Yes, I was behind the DJ booth, but only as a cultural anthropologist.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

My New Year’s resolution is to procrastinate. I’Il start tomorrow.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

I’d like to know what my dog is thinking as he watches me try one outfit after another while getting ready for a party.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

What’s your favorite song about a white boy playing funky music?

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

The echo in my house when it’s clean is unsettling. Better order more stuff.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

Love crawling into bed like it’s a spa retreat, only to wake up like I survived a bar fight.

Trending via WeChat:

People don’t catch bullets with their teeth anymore, get out there and practice.

Live now on Messenger:

Sometimes uncontrollable laughter is all you need to get the millions of thoughts out of your head.

Making waves on Twitch:

I’m the person who requested weather reporters stand in the storms. I have no concept of wind or rain and love seeing needless suffering.

Seen just now on X:

Sex so good, my left hand is making my right hand a sandwich.

Trending via YouTube:

Hello, boyfriend? It’s me, girlfriend, from dating?

Just landed via Discord:

These days, I only use Facebook as a birthday calendar.

Trending via TikTok:

Birthday sex is having sex to celebrate your parents having sex.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Do people who love escape rooms not know about IKEA?

Trending via Messenger:

I only accept apologies in cash.

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