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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a boy that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

Every day, I go to work and draw a little tick on everyone who didn’t say goodbye to me the day before.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

The paintings I always like the most in museums are the ones that have a bench.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

I just realized boobytrap backwards spells partyboob.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

I thought I needed a drink. Turns out what I really needed was a divorce.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

Calling the police when someone unfollows.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

I feel a deep connection to librarians because I also love telling people to shut up.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

A couple of birds are outside fighting. Wait. They’ve quieted down. There’s a third bird. I think he may be their therapist.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

I always ask for a receipt so I can keep them in my purse for 86 years.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

792 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,954

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,954

2 minutes ago

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Reddit:

Yes, I know there is a really special place in hell for me. It’s called a throne.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I feel like a credit card, cause I’m constantly being used irresponsibly.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I hate it when you ask what you thought was a simple question in a meeting at work, and it turns into another meeting.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Sometimes I do something completely out of character, like say no to a slice of pizza, or trust someone.

Spotted on Facebook:

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

Live now on WhatsApp:

You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

There are too many neglected emojis.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Biblical loophole: It’s not premarital sex if you never intend to get married.

Shared recently on Threads:

Laundry has to be the most sinister chore. Always waiting, always lurking.

Making waves on Threads:

Whoever is writing my Rom-Com, can you maybe, I don’t know, START IT?

Unloading the dishwasher in the opposite direction just to feel something.

6 months ago

Unloading the dishwasher in the opposite direction just to feel something.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the rebellious act of reversing the dishwasher unload – a daring endeavor to break free from the monotony of daily tasks! 💪😄 Who knew kitchen chores could spark such excitement and adventure? Take that, ordinary routine! 🍽️♻️ #DishwasherDaring"

chores, direction, dishwasher, domestic, domestic life, feel, feel something, humor, just, life, opposite, opposite direction, relatable, something, unloading

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

792 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,954

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,954

2 minutes ago

3,424

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Being social sucks all my energy.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

When they know you know they did you dirty, they stay gone. And that’s the best thing.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Nothing is smaller than the X on ads to click them away.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

I love Fleetwood Mac, but “thunder only happens when it’s raining” is just not true.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Some people are wise; some are otherwise.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

You’re all badass until that dust bunny in the corner is a real spider.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

I’m looking for a moisturizer to hide the fact that I’ve been tired since 2010.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Sorry, I can’t hang out tomorrow. I hung out with people a week ago and I’m still recovering from that.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

I can’t believe the gall of this bladder.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

They should invent a type of situation that improves.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on LinkedIn:

I am not leaving this house until my hoodie strings are even.

Breaking via Threads:

Every girl’s personal hell is being too excited about their birthday and it ends up being the worst day ever.

Reported on X:

You are my favorite dirty thought.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

If you ever think you can solve a parenting problem by doing the opposite of what didn’t work last time, the universe will just be like “Lol, nice try, dummy!”

Making waves on Facebook:

When you think about it, Jesus really accomplished a lot in the four months between Christmas and Easter.

Broadcasted on X:

Floating on a rock in space, but yeah – 9 to 5 sounds reasonable.

Breaking via Reddit:

People will name their dog Steve and have two kids named Buddy and Rocket.

Freshly posted on Discord:

If I sing “Hello” and you think of “Lionel Richie” and not “Adele,” then you can probably predict the weather with one of your knees.

Making waves on TikTok:

When I say I’m Christmas shopping the “for myself” is silent.

Reported on WhatsApp:

I’m just another dysfunctional train wreck barreling down the tracks with a smile.

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