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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Nasa is launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens. They’re calling it the Apollo G.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

I’m not even doomscrolling anymore; I’m just regular scrolling, and everything’s doomed.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Guy who normally applauds when the plane lands right before the pilot crashes it: “Boo!”

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I already want to take a nap tomorrow.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Sometimes the whole point of going out is to then really savor coming back home.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

I mostly keep friendships going because they have my good Tupperware.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

I don’t understand why people have to “get ready for bed.” I am always ready for bed.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Hide and seek, except it’s my husband searching for where he last put his pants.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

I talk a lot of shit for someone who is startled by my own toast popping up while I’m watching it. Every. Single. Time.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2393 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,555

Funny Quotes Topics

15,234

Funny Quotes Images

12,555

56 minutes ago

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

I like people who can admit their mistakes and apologize. In other words, I like very few people.

Seen just now on Threads:

I like when I walk with people and they note that I’m a fast walker. We’re in a race. We’re in a race and you’re losing actually.

Just landed via YouTube:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again because I have a terrible memory.

Trending via Slack:

We used to have “spring, summer, fall, winter”. Today we have “drama, drama, drama, drama”.

Going viral on Messenger:

I’d be less aggressive in the morning if I could drive to work in a tank.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Just shared via Snapchat:

My exorcist thinks we should see other demons.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely fulfilled the prophecy.

Trending via Facebook:

Adding “scroll for two hours” to my To-Do list, so I won’t do it.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Just once I wanna slide down a dinosaur at the end of my workday, is that too much to ask for?

We need a word for that weird feeling you get when you learn what a podcaster looks like.

6 months ago

We need a word for that weird feeling you get when you learn what a podcaster looks like.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the classic case of podcaster perplexity – that moment when your mental image of a podcast host is shattered by reality. 🤯 It's like realizing your favorite radio voice is actually a cat-loving wizard in pajamas. 🧙‍♂️ Let's call it "auditory disillusionment" or maybe just "Shook-casting!" 😂

appearance, feeling, humor, learn, learning, looks, need, podcaster, reaction, surprise, weird, weird feeling, word

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2393 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,555

Funny Quotes Topics

15,234

Funny Quotes Images

12,555

56 minutes ago

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

If at first you don’t succeed, try two more times so your failure is statistically significant.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Welcome to adulthood. Everyone’s tired here.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

The smarter you are, the more important it is for you to figure out how to think less.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

I’m stuck between “I need to save money” and “You only live once.”

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Sleeping nakey nakey nakey just in case Santa wants a different type of cookie tonight.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Blowing kisses to my coworkers so that nobody talks to me today.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

It’s true that I’ve been through the desert on a horse with no name, but for my return trip, I rented a camel named Carl.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

My dentist plays country music, so it’s like a double torture.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

Going viral on Pinterest:

I love your niche references! Are you typically ignored in large groups, by any chance?

Broadcasted on TikTok:

The guy who drills the holes so you can assemble IKEA furniture is clearly having problems at home.

Spotted on YouTube:

Don’t donate your plasma. It’s a big scam, and they’re just using it to make TVs.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’m sick of getting woken up at 6am by the bin men. I just want a nice sleep but they always insist that I get out of the bin before they collect it.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Livin’ la vida vodka!

Freshly posted on TikTok:

They should invent crushes that like you back.

Going viral on Facebook:

I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I don’t want to see you every day.

Seen just now on Twitch:

My kids had to work extra hard this morning but they were able to get the clean house back to it’s normal messy state just in time for the guests to arrive.

Going viral on Discord:

I’m going to try and be less of a people pleaser, is everyone ok with that?

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