Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

They should make a separate airport for people who know how to act like they’ve been out in public before.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Men love to show you a YouTube video. It is a sign of deep respect in their culture.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

Don’t forget to look directly into the sun for at least 10 minutes per day because that’s where all the vitamins are.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

I hear the responses my young siblings give my mom, and I’m speechless; they don’t know the commando she was in her prime.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

“People you may know” and it’s someone I would set on fire.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

You should be able to like an email instead of replying to it.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

God knew I would be too powerful if I had conversation skills.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

If you say “awesome sauce” on a first date, you’ll still have that lucky condom in your wallet tomorrow.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Not photogenic, but I probably look soooo good as a distant memory.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Can someone call my keys? I forgot where I put them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,396

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

I knew school was a scam when my business teacher didn’t own a business, and my PE teacher was fat.

Just shared via Threads:

My mother still has some really ugly things from the 90s. My older brother, for example.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Taking a dog named shark to the beach is a bad idea.

Just shared via Facebook:

I’m sick of living through history!

Spotted on Instagram:

I woke up again, it’s pathetic how much death fears me.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Why does the phone ring longer when you’re ignoring the call?

Seen just now on Reddit:

They should invent a rest for the wicked.

Just landed via WeChat:

Unlike men, women would immediately admit their mistakes if they had any.

Spotted on Telegram:

I’ve got the longest to-do list for today, just need to figure out who is going to do it.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

You can’t confuse me. I already don’t know what’s going on.

6 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Why fretting over confusion when I've mastered the art of cluelessness? 🤷‍♂️🧐

clueless, confuse, confusion, going, humor, i, know, me, misunderstanding

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I have friends in high places (birds).

2 months ago

birds, friends, high, high places, humor, i, nature, places, witty
Fries, not lies.

2 months ago

comedy, food, food preference, fry, honesty, humor, ly, preference
I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.

2 months ago

every, frantic, glasses, great, i, morning, need, search, thing
I call my smoke detector Gordon Ramsay, because every time I cook it screams at me.

2 months ago

call, cook, cooking, detector, every, gordon, Gordon Ramsay, humor, i, joke, kitchen, me, ramsay, screams, smoke, smoke detector, time
Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean it won’t be a good time.

3 months ago

adventure, bad, bad idea, enjoyment, fun, good, good time, humor, idea, just, mean, risk, spontaneity, time
Phone addiction got so bad that watching a movie feels productive.

2 months ago

addiction, bad, dependence, distraction, feels, humor, movie, phone, phone addiction, productive, productivity, screen, screen time, tech, tech dependence, time, watching, watching movie

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

18 shares on Threads this month:

I hate when I’m trying to spell a word, and my phone can’t do it either.

29 shares on Messenger this month:

The dead bodies on Mt. Everest remind me that it’s perfectly fine to stay home and be lazy.

30 shares on Messenger this month:

Nephew showed me his toys on FaceTime, and I had no toys to show him back. Humiliating.

81 shares on Telegram this month:

I made coffee and carried it to the couch. I’ve done everything I had planned for this Sunday.

30 shares on WeChat this month:

Sorry for how I acted when there were multiple noises happening at the same time.

64 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s important to set an alarm the first day of school, so you remember to pick up the kids.

41 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Made my last mortgage payment. Yay! I still owe a lot, I’m just not paying anymore.

32 shares on TikTok this month:

I don’t rise and shine. I caffeinate and hope.

22 shares on Reddit this month:

Telling an introvert to go to a party is like telling a saint to go to Hell.

93 shares on YouTube this month:

Never understood when the movie rating says “May contain nudity.” Are there people on the ratings board who aren’t sure if they just saw someone naked?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

In an effort to keep our house clean before Thanksgiving, I’ve asked my family to go live somewhere else.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

The perfect job for me would be the person staining things for detergent commercials.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Just bought a new umbrella for the person that finds it tomorrow.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Ninety percent of my new follows are beautiful women, which tells me one thing: I’ve still got it!

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Sometimes when I get negative feedback I’m like “Hey, only I get to talk to myself that way”.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

AirBnB is fun for when you want to be financially abused by a stranger with a binder filled with rules.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

If I was on Love Island, I would get wasted and drown in the pool, altering the course of every contestant’s life forever.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

The only running I do is to chase the ice cream truck.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

You’re in his DMs, so am I, but I am way funnier.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

Pretty sure the inventor of noise-canceling headphones had a young kid trying to learn an instrument.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Got my dog microchipped, so if he runs away, I can just press a button, and he’ll explode.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

My career plan? Win the lottery and disappear.

Shared recently on YouTube:

How did they call Deadpool’s dog ‘Dogpool’ when ‘Deadpoodle’ was right there?

Live now on WeChat:

I wonder if this is all happening because I opened that umbrella inside.

Just landed via Reddit:

Being anti-AI right now feels like being one of the few unbitten humans in a zombie apocalypse.

Seen just now on Reddit:

My sleeping cycle is completely backwards. In the morning I feel sleepy and at night I can’t fall asleep.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Fun fact: Malcolm X was not his birth name. He was originally Malcolm Twitter.

Spotted on Threads:

Took a break from Twitter for my mental health, so I’d figure I’d come back to ruin it again.

Just shared via TikTok:

I’m not religious but I know there’s a hell because Monopoly exists.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You can’t confuse me. I already don’t know what’s going on.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I have friends in high places (birds).

Fries, not lies.

I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.

I call my smoke detector Gordon Ramsay, because every time I cook it screams at me.

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean it won’t be a good time.

Phone addiction got so bad that watching a movie feels productive.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨