Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looks like this man has a habit of spreading hearts around like confetti at a party. Maybe he needs a lesson in proper heart storage – clearly, he's just not framing them right!"

girl, heart, humor, love, man, picture, relationship

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

2 months ago

communication, confidence, God, humor, information, people, relationship, sex, sex god, tell, want
I don’t remember what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a broke, stressed-out, over-thinker with no clothes that fit.

2 months ago

adulthood, broke, clothes, crisis, fit, grown up, humor, i, identity, identity crisis, over-thinker, overthinker, pretty, remember, self-deprecation, stressed-out, sure, wanted
I’m so unpopular at school they call me “Batteries”. I’m never included in anything.

2 months ago

anything, battery, call, humor, included, joke, loneliness, me, never, school, unpopular
If I was Snow White, you wouldn’t get me with an apple. You’d have to poison a taco or something.

2 months ago

apple, fairy, fairy tale, food, food humor, food preference, humor, i, love, me, poison, preference, romance, snow, Snow White, something, taco, tale, white
My husband cleaned the kitchen for the first time in years. He’s in the living room, dressed in a suit, waiting for the award ceremony to commence.

2 months ago

award, award ceremony, ceremony, cleaned, cleaning, dressed, event, funny situation, humor, husband, kitchen, living, living room, room, situation, suit, time, unexpected, unexpected event, waiting
“Can my boyfriend come?” Will he contribute to our conversation, at least one question?

2 months ago

boyfriend, communication, conversation, humor, interaction, least, question, relationship, social, social interaction

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

93 shares on Pinterest this month:

Once you realize I’m an idiot, my posts start to make a lot more sense.

87 shares on X this month:

Do we barbecue with women or without salad?

96 shares on Telegram this month:

Flies are literally obsessed with flying into a room, then pretending they can’t get out. Grow up.

60 shares on Facebook this month:

I would like to have the peace of mind of a cow. I already have the body.

16 shares on Instagram this month:

I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself, “Wow, this changes everything.”

15 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sorry I was late, I was disassociating in the shower.

100 shares on Messenger this month:

I no longer need an alarm clock because I’m over 40 and have a bladder.

81 shares on X this month:

Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.

71 shares on WhatsApp this month:

To be blocked is to be seen and to be seen is to be loved.

74 shares on Instagram this month:

“Have AI summarize this email for you!” No thanks, I can read what the person actually said in the way they intended.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

As long as you don’t ever give them your real name, they can’t accuse you of not keeping the mystery alive in your relationship.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Can someone please help me, I’m still at the Fyre Festival.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

I had a healthy appendix removed, just to show the other organs that I will not tolerate any bullshit.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I need to hire someone to just constantly slap food out of my hand.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

I miss making out in public and making people feel uncomfortable.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Apparently, when you treat someone the same way they treat you, they get offended!

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

Netflix had enough cash to buy Warner Bros., but cried poor when we shared passwords with our mom.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

The one thing I’ve never had in my car’s glove box is a pair of gloves.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

I hate Valentine’s Day but I do enjoy infant archery.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

According to my calculations, we’re all screwed.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

Getting so tangled in the sex shop bead curtain that they have to put me down like a horse with a broken leg.

Seen just now on Telegram:

If you see me looking zoned out, it’s because I’m having a therapy session with myself in my head.

Trending via Slack:

My new drivers license arrived and when I opened it, I gasped. How’d they get a picture of my mother?

Just landed via Slack:

Evenings after work finish too quickly, one meal, one show, and it’s already tomorrow morning.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I came home to find my boyfriend mopping the floor and my first thought was, “who’d he kill?”

Just landed via Instagram:

Imagine marrying an old man for money and you die first.

Just landed via Telegram:

Regrettably, my children appear to have befriended a child I find annoying.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Can y’all just post your therapist’s advice in the comments so I don’t have to go?

Going viral on YouTube:

I think carefully about what I’m going to say and I still manage to say the wrong thing. It’s truly a gift I have.

Live now on Discord:

I’ve been ghosted enough to add paranormal investigator to my resume.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl’s picture.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

I don’t remember what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a broke, stressed-out, over-thinker with no clothes that fit.

I’m so unpopular at school they call me “Batteries”. I’m never included in anything.

If I was Snow White, you wouldn’t get me with an apple. You’d have to poison a taco or something.

My husband cleaned the kitchen for the first time in years. He’s in the living room, dressed in a suit, waiting for the award ceremony to commence.

“Can my boyfriend come?” Will he contribute to our conversation, at least one question?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨