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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Men love when you ask them to explain something to you. It is considered a sign of deep respect in their culture.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

“I’ll just iron my clothes for work in the morning,” he thought in stupid bachelor.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

You okay, babe? You’ve hardly touched the promises you made me.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Hilarious when peoples outgoing voicemail message says they “can’t make it to the phone right now.” You carry the phone with you. It’s the only constant in your life.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

Not pretty enough for Instagram, not funny enough for Twitter. Welcome to WhatsApp status.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Turtles made out of plastic, problem solved.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

I’m trying to quit making sexual innuendos but it’s so hard.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

332 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,925

Funny Quotes Topics

17,098

Funny Quotes Images

14,925

Updated

Dec 13, 2025

Users Online

3,631

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

Going from summer clothes to winter clothes: “Okay!” Going from winter clothes to summer clothes: “I AM NOT READY!”

Spotted on Threads:

Applied for an internship to gain experience and got rejected because I didn’t have relevant experience.

Spotted on Telegram:

Oh no, a login from a new device? And that device is my phone? The one that I use every single day? And the location is my house, you say? Thank you so much for warning me. I will contact Interpol.

Trending via TikTok:

Your in his DMs, I’m on Etsy paying a witch to put a spell on him.

Just landed via X:

Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

Going viral on TikTok:

There are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Before I die, I’m going to arrange for a friend to take my phone, and after the funeral, text everybody to say “thanks for coming” and other assorted messages of appreciation.

Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When you realize true love can come with dinner reservations and no split checks 😂💸❤️

change, dating, girlfriend, money, perspective, relationship, relationships, whole

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Can it still be an emotional support animal if the animal doesn’t want to participate? Asking for my cat.

1 month ago

animal, asking, cat, emotional, emotional support, humor, participation, still, support, want
For the amount of meat you get out of clam, I feel like we could just leave them alone.

1 month ago

alone, amount, clam, feel, food, food humor, funny observation, humor, i, just, leave, leave alone, meat, observation, seafood
Building a snowman so I can punch it in the face.

1 month ago

activity, aggression, building, face, fun, fun activity, humor, i, playful, playful aggression, punch, snowman, winter
If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?

1 month ago

activity, divine, feel, fun, fun activity, God, good, humor, irony, meant, pleasure, procreation, religion, sex, why
90s scientists: we cloned a sheep. we landed a robot on mars. Scientists today: for the last time, the earth is round.

1 month ago

90s, cloning, Earth, flat earth, Flat Earther, humor, last, Mars, robot, round, science, scientists, sheep, time, today
I’m too old to be jingling all the way, I’ll jingle til about five thirty.

1 month ago

age, five, holiday, humor, jingle, old, thirty, time, too

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

If you would just let me help, you’d be in an even worse position than you are now.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Okay, seen enough, someone put a blanket over my cage.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

Everyone has that one friend they’ve known for years and still have no idea what they actually do for a living, but it’s too late to ask.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

I know it’s traditional to start work at 9, but I think we could lower that age to 8.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

Thank God for headphones and day dreaming.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

It’s a paradox that your nose is running and your feet smell.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t need a special occasion to buy a cake.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Your problems are neither sexual nor spiritual, they are gastrointestinal.

Just shared via WeChat:

My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well, he actually said “less McDonald’s”, but I’m pretty sure I know what he meant.

Just landed via WeChat:

Your car antlers tell me everything I need to know about you.

Making waves on Twitch:

“Thank you for choosing Amtrak.” No problem. There are no other trains.

Making waves on Slack:

“What’s love?” Grandma sliding money into my hand like a drug dealer. Yeah, man, that’s love.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Traffic is the fault of the guy immediately in front of you.

Just landed via TikTok:

Lie about the gap in your resume. Tell them you had to help some Hobbits take a ring to Mordor or something.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

Can it still be an emotional support animal if the animal doesn’t want to participate? Asking for my cat.

For the amount of meat you get out of clam, I feel like we could just leave them alone.

Building a snowman so I can punch it in the face.

If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?

90s scientists: we cloned a sheep. we landed a robot on mars. Scientists today: for the last time, the earth is round.

I’m too old to be jingling all the way, I’ll jingle til about five thirty.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Showers are the best places to lose arguments with yourself.

Opening up to a woman is like talking to the police, anything you say can and will be used against you.

What part of “I need to save money” do I not understand?

Pet owners be like “this is my pet Snoopy, but their nicknames are Booboo and Thicky Boy!”

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Stop asking people over 40 what we like to do for fun. You’re not gonna like the answer.

My favorite part of parenting is when the kids are bored enough to entertain themselves, but getting to that point is excruciating.

I have lived way too many lives for people to think they know everything about me.

I love 12 a.m. to 5 a.m. The world is so quiet.

Eventually, kids get old enough to see which parent was the problem.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I told the trees what you did. Be wary when you enter the forest next.

I have everything you could possibly ever need in my purse, except for money.

Long sandwiches should have suitcase handles.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Maybe if we paid our streaming services even more, they could stop jacking up the volume on the commercials they make us watch, even though we are paying for the service.

You can’t tell me there’s anything better than earplugs; I simply will not hear it.

I like to think of myself as an onion. Peel back the many layers and deep down inside you’ll find a smaller, more anxious onion.

The longer I stay home, the more homeless I look.

Accidentally punched myself in the face while trying to pull my blanket up, and if that doesn’t accurately describe my life, I don’t know what does.

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Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Can it still be an emotional support animal if the animal doesn’t want to participate? Asking for my cat.

For the amount of meat you get out of clam, I feel like we could just leave them alone.

Building a snowman so I can punch it in the face.

If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?

90s scientists: we cloned a sheep. we landed a robot on mars. Scientists today: for the last time, the earth is round.

I’m too old to be jingling all the way, I’ll jingle til about five thirty.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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