Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Join the Snack Side, we have cookies! 🍪 Or face the consequences and snack in solitude. The choice is yours… and might we suggest the path with the tastiest rewards! 😂🍿 #SnackWars"

competition, friendship, fun, humor, me, snack, snacking, togetherness

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

When I retire, I’m going to run for office.

0

2 months ago

ambition, career, election, going, humor, i, joke, office, politics, retire, retirement, run
Horoscope: You will give blood generously this week, but it won’t be your idea.

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2 months ago

blood, generosity, give, horoscope, humor, idea, prediction, week
Patience is for beginners. I’d rather freak out straight away!

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2 months ago

away, beginners, freak, freak out, humor, ID, patience, reaction, spontaneity, straight, stress
Good luck sending me mixed signals. Most the time I can’t even understand the direct ones.

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2 months ago

communication, confusion, direct, direct signals, good, humor, i, luck, me, mixed, mixed signals, relationships, sarcasm, signals, time, understanding
Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy: Go shopping and leave them at home with their dad.

0

2 months ago

activity, dad, day, days, energy, fun, fun activity, home, kids, leave, much, rainy, rainy day, shopping, too
Did it make you feel powerful when you didn’t let me merge onto the highway?

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2 months ago

confrontation, driving, feel, frustration, highway, humor, let, me, merge, power, powerful, traffic

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

44 shares on Facebook this month:

Getting the ick because he put the windshield wipers on at a higher rate than was needed.

14 shares on Snapchat this month:

Plot twist: the universe is waiting for you to give it a sign.

43 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Pets don’t talk because the moment they do, the government will tax them.

73 shares on Discord this month:

The best way to use Twitter will forever be as an observer.

84 shares on Facebook this month:

White guys have a slur for other white guys they don’t respect, it’s called ‘buddy.’

24 shares on Discord this month:

Can’t wait for this AI bubble to pop so we can all go back to normal, just like how the internet completely disappeared after the dot-com bubble popped.

40 shares on Reddit this month:

Horror movies should add bloopers, so after watching the main film, you’ll be able to sleep.

38 shares on Discord this month:

If I was pregnant and people asked when I was due, I would say “What do you mean?”

97 shares on WeChat this month:

I will selflessly protect my family from a life of diabetes by eating all the sweets myself.

49 shares on Pinterest this month:

Be the reason why your local woods are haunted.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

I haven’t cleaned my shower in so long, it’s becoming a terrarium. Absolutely gorgeous.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Mid-life crisis? No, no, mid-day crisis. Something happens every day.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

I’m sorry I mistook all our laughs, long nights, sweet texts, and inside jokes as you caring. I’ll think twice before wasting my time again.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

I don’t mind driving in bad weather. I mind other people driving in bad weather.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Mini skirts are so cute and fun, like, oops, my ass is out.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

If all men are the same, why does it take women so long to choose one?

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

The sluttiest thing a man can do is have an ethical dilemma over his lust for you.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

Sorry, can’t. The pears I bought a couple days ago have ripened.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Me at war: You guys mind if I leave a bit early today?

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Sometimes the universe puts you in the same situations again to see if you’re still an idiot.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

Too many losers and not enough people telling them they’re losers.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Dinosaurs are always described as “roaming” the earth, which is patronizing as hell, I bet they had places to go and important shit to do.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Halloween candy isn’t bad for you if you keep it in a salad bowl.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

People just don’t stop, collaborate, and listen like they used to.

Breaking via Instagram:

I want to make fun of Kanye but I’m always losing my shit on the internet too.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I have almost 100,000 miles on my office chair. So I got that going for me.

Making waves on Discord:

No crypto for me, thanks, at least not until I figure out how dollars work.

Just shared via Telegram:

Don’t worry, guys. Together we can eliminate logic and reason on social media. I see some of you are already ahead of the game. Way to go!

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I dunno what I did in a past life but holy crap I’m sorry.

Trending via Reddit:

I was guest-starring on The Love Boat when you woke me up. You’re dead to me.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You’re either snacking with me or snacking against me.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

When I retire, I’m going to run for office.

Horoscope: You will give blood generously this week, but it won’t be your idea.

Patience is for beginners. I’d rather freak out straight away!

Good luck sending me mixed signals. Most the time I can’t even understand the direct ones.

Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy: Go shopping and leave them at home with their dad.

Did it make you feel powerful when you didn’t let me merge onto the highway?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨