You’re in his DMs, so am I, but I am way funnier.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

I wonder if this is all happening because I opened that umbrella inside.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

She’s got style. She’s got grace. She dropped her cellphone on her face. She’s a lady.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

To my beloved wife, I leave my circus and my monkeys.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

There are too many movies about vampire hunters and not enough about vampire gatherers.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Theo Von’s entire life is like a raccoon that visits New York City.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

I don’t think fish should be allowed to eat other fish. I don’t know. Just seems weird. That’s like your coworker, dude.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

Because of my looks, everyone only wants one thing from me, that I leave them alone.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

“You tryna hang?” Yeah bro, myself!

Someone from 🇨🇳 has shared:

The pointless tidy-up before a play date.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

In honor of Charles Dickens, I will also be poor this Christmas.