Sometimes I’m out in public and I have to look down real quick to make sure I remembered to put on pants.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

I read somewhere on the internet that 87% of what you read on the internet isn’t true, and I believe it.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

The clitoris has 8,000 nerves, if you gonna get on my nerves, get on one of those.

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Nothing prepares you for the day you wake up and realize you have a favorite cardigan.

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I love my new crockpot. Now we can wait longer to eat my horrible cooking.

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The only way the climate is going to change is if it first admits it has a problem, there’s really nothing we can do.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

Made it to Friday, but at what cost? Monday is literally in 20 minutes.

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Thinking about ignoring daily mess by creating new holiday decor mess.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

The healthy food in my fridge should be grateful really. It survives much longer than everything else.

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Of all the things to lose, why couldn’t it have been my appetite and not my mind?

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Being sleepy all day is just part of who I am.