Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Decisions, decisions… 🤔 Who knew stupidity could be so tempting? 😂 Perhaps the key to eternal happiness lies in embracing the blissfully ignorant side! 🤪 #LifeGoals"

after, careful, choice, consideration, fun, humor, i, ID, life, life choice, stupid, think

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Jobs be asking me for 3 references, and I think I might start doing the same. Like, let me talk to 3 happy employees, please.

0

3 months ago

3, asking, doing, employee, employees, happy, hiring, humor, i, interview, job, jobs, let, me, please, reference, references, same, start, talk, think, workplace
My kids have been joking for weeks about a new Pokémon called Puke-Achu and then they got the stomach flu and brought it to life.

0

2 months ago

flu, humor, illness, joke, joking, kids, life, new, parenting, Pokémon, Puke-Achu, stomach, stomach flu, weeks
A peaceful transition of power happening between me and this red wine just now.

0

2 months ago

drinking, happening, humor, joke, just, me, peace, peaceful, power, red, red wine, relaxation, transition, wine
My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

0

2 months ago

bar, beer, beers, consumption, furniture, Gjörfbunkle, humor, i, IKEA, least, meant, opinion, purchase, shopping, should, think, three
I used to schedule naps, but now they’re little surprise parties my body throws at all hours of the day.

0

2 months ago

body, day, exhaustion, fun, hours, humor, i, little, nap, naps, party, rest, schedule, surprise, surprise party, time, used
Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.

0

2 months ago

athlete, cheesecake, dessert, eating, food, humor, i, irony, quark, sad, sadness, whenever

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on Facebook this month:

If you’re looking for another bad decision, I’m here.

50 shares on Snapchat this month:

It’s weird when you realize we are the last generation on this Earth to know what lite was like before social media.

71 shares on Messenger this month:

No one talks about how uncomfortable it is to ask for your own money back.

36 shares on Messenger this month:

Got kicked out of reincarnation club for yelling yolo.

46 shares on Messenger this month:

If you push your belly button and nose at the same time, your brain takes a screenshot.

62 shares on Slack this month:

The first 120 hours after the weekend are always the worst.

86 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you need me, I will be at the library sniffing old books.

64 shares on Discord this month:

I like it when it’s raining, because I can hold my umbrella really low and it makes everyone headless.

45 shares on Telegram this month:

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

64 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m glad cars were invented. Imagine riding a horse at 3 a.m., coming back from the club.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

*Pointing at a mothers shrieking baby* Is this guy bothering you?

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Glad to be born at a time when I got to see what life was like before the internet, and will be dead before AI completely destroys humanity.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

I don’t need to bring anything to a knife fight, because I don’t go to knife fights.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Very disappointed to find out that the universal remote control I bought does not control the universe.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Going to McDonald’s to get the Grinch meal, then going to Burger King to get the Spongebob meal. Then disappearing into the forest for twenty years.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I’m just here to make you wish I wasn’t.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

Even wild things have slow mornings.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

A piece of chocolate contains just enough energy to take another one.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Folding laundry is like packing to stay home.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

The possibility of monsters residing underneath your bed is negated when the mattress is positioned on the floor.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

The ideal man is always thinking of several cool things at once (throwing a football really far, a truck with big wheels, giving a lot of high fives).

Freshly posted on Discord:

My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Long-distance couples be like, “I can’t wait,” and then they wait.

Broadcasted on X:

I live in constant fear of being asked to repeat what you just said after I say I’m listening.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I think during winter we should also get to work less hours in a day, just like the sun.

Breaking via WeChat:

I’m professionally employed and personally unhinged. Balance.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Discovering the Spice Girls broke up not over money and fame but lesbianism.

Trending via Messenger:

Maybe in another life, I’m a spoiled nepo baby — jobless and doing nothing but shopping all day with my equally nepotised friends.

Trending via Slack:

My toxic trait is consistently cutting off the resealable part of the bag of frozen vegetables.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

How long do you actually have to wear a muscle shirt until you get muscles?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

After careful consideration, I think I’d have way more fun if I was incredibly stupid.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Jobs be asking me for 3 references, and I think I might start doing the same. Like, let me talk to 3 happy employees, please.

My kids have been joking for weeks about a new Pokémon called Puke-Achu and then they got the stomach flu and brought it to life.

A peaceful transition of power happening between me and this red wine just now.

My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

I used to schedule naps, but now they’re little surprise parties my body throws at all hours of the day.

Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨