Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Decisions, decisions… 🤔 Who knew stupidity could be so tempting? 😂 Perhaps the key to eternal happiness lies in embracing the blissfully ignorant side! 🤪 #LifeGoals"

after, careful, choice, consideration, fun, humor, i, ID, life, life choice, stupid, think

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Edging my house plants by putting them next to the window when it rains.

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2 months ago

activity, funny activity, gardening, house, house plant, humor, indoor, indoor plant, light, nature, next, plant, plants, rain, window
One day my sanity went out for smokes and never came back.

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6 months ago

absence, addiction, back, came, day, health, humor, loss, mental, mental health, mind, never, sanity, smoke
Day number 3 without coffee: Lost hearing in my left eye.

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2 months ago

addiction, coffee, day, eye, hearing, humor, left, lost, number, withdrawal
I’m so tired of not being a multimillionaire.

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2 months ago

being, frustration, money, multimillionaire, tired, wealth
You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

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2 months ago

anything, book, boredom, bro, childhood, fair, feel, feelings, humor, i, me, nostalgia, scholastic, Scholastic Book Fair
Asking him what his favorite dinosaur is on the first date to determine compatibility.

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3 months ago

asking, compatibility, date, dating, dinosaur, favorite, first date, humor, question

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

78 shares on X this month:

Psych meds aren’t enough anymore. Hit me with a shovel.

71 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Why would I get married when it’s a well-known fact that only 50% of all marriages end in divorce?

64 shares on Reddit this month:

Walking that line between “The internet is great” and “The internet is a mistake” daily.

16 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m pretty sure I fall under the percentage of people who’ve eaten the sticker on the apple.

63 shares on Instagram this month:

You ever go to a baseball game and hear a guy yelling, “hot dogs! hot dogs!” over and over again? That’s me, looking for hot dogs.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Lost my job to AI (my job was to be loudly and confidently incorrect).

23 shares on Facebook this month:

Oh, I didn’t tell you? Must have been none of your business, then.

25 shares on WeChat this month:

My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.

66 shares on Instagram this month:

The me who snips coupons needs to communicate better with the me who walks into the stores.

85 shares on Telegram this month:

Working out consistently yields results, but mannnnnnn…… the laundry.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Friendship is when you don’t tidy up before visitors arrive.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Millionaires and multi-billion dollar companies be like, “We’re doing our part by asking the poor to donate to the poor.”

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

Moment of silence for those who received mugs that aren’t microwave- and dishwasher-safe.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Statistically speaking, on average, a person has two arms, two legs, one testicle, and one ovary.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

I want to be the kind of person who eats half a grapefruit for breakfast and runs every morning, but I also want to be happy.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Getting to know someone these days is impossible. No one is really single, everyone has something going on, is hung up on their ex or is otherwise damaged in some way.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

My car is making strange noises but it’s just me singing.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Automated phone system: To speak to a representative, please enter the first twelve digits of pi.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

I’m pretty sure I fall under the percentage of people who’ve eaten the sticker on the apple.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on X:

It’s important that everyone takes really good pictures of me this summer.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

All these galaxies and planets, and we ended up on the one with 40 hour work weeks.

Just shared via WeChat:

“You’re so understanding,” yeah, because I don’t want to go to prison for the rest of my life.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I don’t run from my problems. I sit on my couch, play on my phone, and ignore them like all other adults.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Channeling my inner forest ghost: hauntingly fabulous and slightly lost.

Just shared via WeChat:

Gender and sexuality aside, I believe everyone just wants someone who wears short shorts and makes a lot of noise in bed.

Shared recently on Threads:

Stretching my back isn’t enough; I need to take out my spine and wring it out like a towel.

Just landed via WeChat:

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

Making waves on Messenger:

Can everyone log off? I need some time alone right now.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Accidentally became important at work and it’s ruining my life.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

After careful consideration, I think I’d have way more fun if I was incredibly stupid.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Edging my house plants by putting them next to the window when it rains.

One day my sanity went out for smokes and never came back.

Day number 3 without coffee: Lost hearing in my left eye.

I’m so tired of not being a multimillionaire.

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

Asking him what his favorite dinosaur is on the first date to determine compatibility.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨