At the Pride and Prejudice showing booing whenever Prejudice comes on screen.

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My summer body has been pending for about ten years.

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Women swear they be broke… Then, all of a sudden, here comes that Shein delivery.

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Many people mistakenly believe that diamond is the hardest substance on earth, but in reality it is my husband’s stubborn head.

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Petition to change the name of rice cakes to something else as they are 100% rice and 0% cake and I’m tired of all the gaslighting.

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I’ve never seen a McDonald’s or a Burger King under construction. They just show up.

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You ever go to a baseball game and hear a guy yelling, “hot dogs! hot dogs!” over and over again? That’s me, looking for hot dogs.

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I made a graph showing my past relationships. It has an ex axis and a why axis.

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Caught my son chewing on electrical wires. So, I grounded him. He’s doing better currently and conducting himself properly.

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Spotify wrapped is like my annual mental health report and it’s getting worse by each passing year.

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Women are like apples; I like biting them.