Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

Like most people my age, I’m 50.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

I can now tell the hour of the day by which part of my body needs a heating pad.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

I love when my brain cells kiss and I have an idea.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

Tonight, the moon is staring at me.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

I don’t even get disappointed anymore. I’m just like, “Oh, again? Okay.”

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

Somewhere, a therapist you never met knows about you.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

I was googling the best time to visit Italy. It is when you have money.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

If you put a pizza on top of a pizza, you have two pizzas. But if you stack two lasagnas, then you still have one lasagna.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Using my invisible hula hoop really freaks people out.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Whoever said having a crush is when you feel the most like Carrie Bradshaw was so real for that.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,293

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I dreamt this night that I had died and when I woke up, a piece of me was actually already stiff.

Making waves on WeChat:

Flirting with submissives is actually really easy. All you gotta do is send a gif of a small animal and say, ‘This is so you.’

Shared recently on Twitch:

The night before a day off is more satisfying than the actual day off.

Going bananas on Messenger:

I wish I was mysterious, but unfortunately I just can’t keep my mouth shut.

Trending via Slack:

Microdosing Christmas by being present.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Just saw my evil doppelganger speed away in a DeLorean. I’m sure it’s fine.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Some of you are still single because, when someone sends you romantic words, you reply with “hahaha.”

Making waves on Discord:

Don’t talk to me unless you are a ham sandwich.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Your DM doesn’t match the Bible quote in your bio. Uh-oh.

Spotted on Threads:

I’ll be home for Christmas, because that’s where I live.

Do people who spend a fortune on outdoor heating know they can just go inside?

1 week ago

Funny Quotes

Witty quote about outdoor heaters highlighting amusing indoor options, playful and humorous tone.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Why stop at outdoor heating? Let's make outdoor refrigerators a thing too! 😂❄️🍹"

comfort, expense, fortune, heating, humor, indoor, inside, irony, just, know, outdoor, outdoor heating, people, practicality, spend, temperature

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Social Media Stars ⭐

62 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m a pocket full of sunshine, not your dumping ground for grumpiness.

53 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Some people call me crazy. I prefer the term happy with a twist.

66 shares on Discord this month:

I bet my calculator app wrapped would be pretty shameful.

39 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Subtitles are for when you’re eating chips.

59 shares on Instagram this month:

We should just cancel April Fools Day this year. No prank can top reality right now.

21 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I would love to go back to the days when the biggest stress was finding the best hiding place when playing hide and seek.

21 shares on Facebook this month:

I didn’t just turn into a grouchy old woman overnight. It took years of people letting me down, pissing me off, and dealing with idiots to get this good at it.

29 shares on TikTok this month:

Accidentally clicked a post about UFOs, and now my Facebook algorithm thinks I’m a much different person.

33 shares on Snapchat this month:

Smoking will kill you. Bacon will kill you. Ironically, smoking bacon will cure it.

68 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m not a dietitian, but if you eat pizza right at midnight your body doesn’t know if the calories go towards yesterday or today so they don’t count.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Dad Hack: Get your teen’s attention instantly by pre-heating the oven.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

I hear the responses my young siblings give my mom, and I’m speechless; they don’t know the commando she was in her prime.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

How do I get one of those fake corporate jobs where I work remotely, get paid for responding to one email a day, and have a laptop on with Outlook or whatever open?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Some woman is out there right now, pregnant with Leonardo DiCaprio’s next girlfriend.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

The only thing you can count on with some people is that you can’t count on them.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

Performative male is kinda just a rebrand of metrosexual, which is just a way to say a straight guy is a little bit faggy.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Once you are able to find humor in any situation, you’ve either reached enlightenment or you’re just a little unhinged.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

There are people who know when to reply all and when not to reply all, and none of them work at your company.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

I love my cat, but I hope in her next life she’s reincarnated as the owner of a very whiny cat.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Me: “I should treat myself to something.” My bank account: “Dream on.”

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Discord:

Every time I think I’m cooked, God moves mountains for me. That’s so nice of Him.

Live now on Facebook:

It’s not the destination that matters. It’s the snacks you eat on the way.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

How do you tell someone that you will probably end up marrying them, but in a casual way?

Live now on Discord:

When life closes a door, just open it again. It’s a door, that’s how they work.

Trending via YouTube:

Need a professional way to say, “I do not care, don’t mention this to me again.”

Just shared via Twitch:

Extrovert self made too many plans and now introvert self is pissed.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Japan’s greatest tragedy is having the world’s best toilets and no Mexican food. What’s the point of owning a Ferrari if you never take it to the track?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

They should invent a Twitter where the timeline doesn’t refresh against your will.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.

Shared recently on TikTok:

The money I made gradually, you need urgently?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Do people who spend a fortune on outdoor heating know they can just go inside?

If you love someone, let them go. If they come back with snacks, it was always meant to be.

Donuts are beautiful creatures, and they deserve their own week on the nature channels.

I’m soirée for my mispronunciation of French words.

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

Me rereading his texts after we’ve already said goodnight just so I can giggle and blush all over again.

Now hush, Lil Labubu, don’t you cry, everything’s gonna be Dubai.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Do people who spend a fortune on outdoor heating know they can just go inside?

Keep the laugh going 😂

If you love someone, let them go. If they come back with snacks, it was always meant to be.

Donuts are beautiful creatures, and they deserve their own week on the nature channels.

I’m soirée for my mispronunciation of French words.

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

Me rereading his texts after we’ve already said goodnight just so I can giggle and blush all over again.

Now hush, Lil Labubu, don’t you cry, everything’s gonna be Dubai.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨