Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

I respect the moon because it controls three of our most precious entities: oceans, wolves & women.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

Lately, when I meet new people, I ask them what their hobbies are instead of what they do for work, and let me tell you, the conversations have been absolutely top tier!

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

“I’d love to go to the moon” I said “but on a full moon day of course, no point going all that way when only half of it’s there”

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

I’m not talking to my husband and I don’t think he even knows it.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

A thing I never realized about being an adult is that you will always be cleaning your kitchen. No matter if you get takeout, no matter if you’re gone all day, you will be cleaning the kitchen.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

No one flirts better than a guy who’s not interested in you.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

No matter how messed up your situation is, someone on Reddit’s already lived it, cried about it, and made a 3-part update with screenshots and farmed 12k upvotes.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Self-care is putting your face on a very soft cat.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Why the hell is my laundry bin always full? I’m not even going anywhere.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,839

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

I’m never really sure what to do with my hands when I go jogging, so I don’t go jogging.

Shared recently on Reddit:

The sun is so successful because it has the perfect bedtime and morning routines.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I am so incredibly tired today. I think my shelf life has expired.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Hobosexual. A person who dates you with the sole interest of having a place to stay.

Making waves on Reddit:

We are all monsters searching for someone to share our lives with.

Seen just now on Twitch:

The masculine urge to make a woman sit through a YouTube video that she will not find funny or entertaining.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

No, I didn’t eat enough protein today, but I did think of you with enough intensity to generate new muscle tissue in my heart.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Overthinkaholic!

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Are you stupid, sand? You could just lay here forever on this beautiful beach, but no, you have to try with all you’ve got, to get into my shoes.

Just landed via Instagram:

Those who run away from me are afraid that they might confess their love to me.

Does bisexual mean twice as sexual or once every other sexual?

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Twice the fun, double the confusion! 🤔😂❤️

bisexual, every, humor, mean, once, orientation, sexual, sexual orientation, sexuality, twice, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Don’t be alarmed at my semicolon usage; I’m a professional.

0

2 months ago

grammar, humor, joke, professional, punctuation, semicolon, usage, writing
Sure, I’m uncomfortable, but only in situations.

0

2 months ago

anxiety, awkwardness, humor, irony, situation, situations, social, social anxiety, sure, uncomfortable
There is nothing worse in life than calling customer service and hearing an Indian accent.

0

2 months ago

accent, call, calling, communication, customer, customer service, frustration, hearing, indian, life, nothing, phone, phone call, service, stereotype, worse
I hate that I’m so indecisive. Actually, I don’t know if hate is the right word.

0

3 months ago

actually, confusion, decision, hate, humor, i, indecisive, know, right, self-deprecation, word
You’ll be fighting for your life financially and that’s when all your toiletries finish at the same time.

0

2 months ago

expenses, fighting, finance, finish, humor, irony, life, same, struggle, time, timing, toiletry
Have you ever met someone and thought that you couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life without them?

0

2 months ago

ever, humor, life, meet, relationship, rest, sarcasm, someone, spend, thought, wait

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

31 shares on Pinterest this month:

I will never understand people who don’t gasp dramatically at rainbows.

24 shares on Slack this month:

Pumpkin spice season comes earlier every year and yet some still deny climate change.

23 shares on WeChat this month:

So proud of my ancestors for crawling out of the sea and evolving lungs. Pretty disappointed in them ever since though.

22 shares on Instagram this month:

Be so funny that everyone forgets that you are ugly!

32 shares on Slack this month:

My bank assures me my money is safe with them, yet they keep their pens chained to desks and most of them are missing.

10 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My friends have canceled our dinner plans two nights in a row. I’m starting to think they don’t like dinner.

28 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t always push on pull doors but when I do, I do it two or three times to confirm how dumb I really am.

16 shares on X this month:

Adulthood is just always being tired and wondering how you hurt your back.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Who would have thought that eating a can of beans would backfire like this?

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

My superpower is embarrassing myself.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Did anyone ask the daylight if it wanted to be saved?

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

“Some men go months without being hugged.” Okay, then they should just hug each other.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

I think something’s missing in my life… Like… 2-3 million dollars.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

The amount of family secrets you uncover as you get older is wild.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Going to the beach as a feet guy must be insane.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Saying “shut up” before skipping the YouTube ad is literally necessary.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

So many spreadsheets and not once did I feel excelled.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Sunsets and women are undoubtedly God’s best creations.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

They should name a personality disorder after me.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

For security reasons, I highly recommend that you leave one of your children home during the holidays to set elaborate booby traps in case of intruders.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Sledding is the best! (until you have to walk back up the hill)

Trending via Telegram:

Men are only nice for 3 weeks, then surprise you with another personality.

Just shared via Threads:

I did nothing wrong. I tried to do nothing and did it wrong.

Shared recently on WeChat:

It’s Monday, but at what cost?

Trending via YouTube:

When your stomach is really mad at you, and you’re not sure which one of your 13 unhealthy lifestyle choices is causing it.

Trending via Telegram:

“I’m great at saving money, as long as I don’t go anywhere, see anyone, or open my eyes.”

Going viral on Threads:

Are you my appendix? Cause you seem kind of useless to me.

Freshly posted on X:

Dear diary, sorry for only ever talking about myself. How are you? Do you have any hobbies?

Seen just now on Reddit:

“Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have” is all well and good until you’re rocking a tutu.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Does bisexual mean twice as sexual or once every other sexual?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Don’t be alarmed at my semicolon usage; I’m a professional.

Sure, I’m uncomfortable, but only in situations.

There is nothing worse in life than calling customer service and hearing an Indian accent.

I hate that I’m so indecisive. Actually, I don’t know if hate is the right word.

You’ll be fighting for your life financially and that’s when all your toiletries finish at the same time.

Have you ever met someone and thought that you couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life without them?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨